Safe Zone
Safe Zone

Safe Zone

Friend Zoned
Friend Zoned

Friend Zoned

The Friend Zone
The Friend Zone

The Friend Zone

The Friends
The Friends

The Friends

Friend Zoning
Friend Zoning

Friend Zoning

allen
allen

allen

go to school
 go to school

go to school

boy friend
 boy friend

boy friend

boyfriends
 boyfriends

boyfriends

figures
figures

figures

🔥 | Latest

Bad, Books, and England: a togand toad-are-triends My favorite thing about Thomas the Tank Engine is that in canonically takes place in a train postapocalypse where the island of Sodor is the only safe zone in a totalitarian dysnopia in which steam trains are routinely killed and their body parts are sold or canmbaled for repair If you think I'm kidding you need to read the original books leontroid eenud could you please direct me to a souroei would feel much better if this was validated. frog-and toad-are-friends S It took me so long to find this quote online but i did it because it's so much darker than one might expect from Thomas the Tank Engine Engines on the Other Railway arent sale now. Their controllers are eruel. They dont lke engines any more. They put them on cold damp sidings, and then" Percy nearly sobbed, "Ihey they cecut them up "The Bluebels of England" Stepney the Bluebel Engine. Rex Awdry, Wibert. London Egmont Pubshing 1963. This ilustration, by Gunvor and Peter fidwards, accompanied the above text in the original book, and depicts a pair of unfortunate Cther Railway engines moments before being disassembled with a blowtorch A dainydice HOLY FUCK LOOK AT THE ONE IN THE BACKGROUND THEY TOOK ITS FUCONG FACE OMG trogand toad-are-tiends zidane the early thomas the tank engine books are pretty standard stuff. saccharine bubblegum type stories and ilustrations. you watched the show, is ke that in book form. the second hall of the railway series are so fucking dark and sureal im cominced they were a result of reverend wilbur awdry doing copious amounts of lad and having hallucinations of his own death. frog-and toad-are-triends Eecuse me but the rery fest story in the Railway Series is about an engine who hides in a turnel and refuses to run because he doesn't want to pet his paint job ruined in the rain, so railway management seals off the tunnel They eventually let him out because another engine breaks down or something, but the original plan was to just leave him in there forever ahulamithbond On the show, didnt they also hook up one engine to a generator, so he'd never move again? That was iterally one of the inesIn, Is on some other post on here. I was chilling frog-and to adare-triends a Yes! This also happened in the books, to an engine refemed to only as "No. 2, but the selevision series applied the same scenario to an inwented character named "Smudger", in the episode "Granputf. "Smudges" said Duke Was a show-off. He rode roughly and often came off the rails. I warned him to be careful, but he took no notice Usten, Dukie" he snared. "Who wories about a few spils Ha aid, but Smudger lghed Unil one day. Manager said he was going to make him useful at last. Smudger stopped laughing then" Wwwhy What did he do "He tumed him ito a generator. He's sil there behind our shed. Hell never move again." deducecanse This is so fucked up 4 unclewhisky No, sten Okay, so we see Ralway Management doing all this shit, right, but supposedly ifs so much worse in the Other Ralays?i mea, sure, you might get tumed into generator or bricked into a tunnel for not doing as yoưre told, but at least you're not cut up and sold for parts, right? s not so bod on the island of Sodot right? a Or maybe thara just what Rulway Managament warta the engines to think Maybe the island of Sodor is the real totalitarian regime, and the engine citizens (slaves) are fed propaganda, kustrated in belish araes and sulfurie vellows,about how ilustrated in helish grays and sulfuric yellows, about how bad it is everywhere else, at all the Other Railways. You are lucky to be an engine of Seder. Railmay Management cares about you Tryst Railway Management. Stay on Your Track. It Could Be So Much Worse. connethepaganangel Wet the fuck is this train based 1984 bulshit Source frogand toad are friends 220440 netes Thomas and his friends
Bad, Books, and England: a togand toad-are-triends
 My favorite thing about Thomas the Tank Engine is that in
 canonically takes place in a train postapocalypse where
 the island of Sodor is the only safe zone in a totalitarian
 dysnopia in which steam trains are routinely killed and
 their body parts are sold or canmbaled for repair
 If you think I'm kidding you need to read the original
 books
 leontroid
 eenud
 could you please direct me to a souroei would feel much
 better if this was validated.
 frog-and toad-are-friends
 S
 It took me so long to find this quote online but i did it
 because it's so much darker than one might expect from
 Thomas the Tank Engine
 Engines on the Other Railway arent sale now. Their
 controllers are eruel. They dont lke engines any more.
 They put them on cold damp sidings, and then" Percy
 nearly sobbed, "Ihey they cecut them up
 "The Bluebels of England" Stepney the Bluebel
 Engine. Rex Awdry, Wibert. London Egmont
 Pubshing 1963.
 This ilustration, by Gunvor and Peter fidwards,
 accompanied the above text in the original book, and
 depicts a pair of unfortunate Cther Railway engines
 moments before being disassembled with a blowtorch
 A dainydice
 HOLY FUCK LOOK AT THE ONE IN THE BACKGROUND
 THEY TOOK ITS FUCONG FACE OMG
 trogand toad-are-tiends
 zidane
 the early thomas the tank engine books are pretty
 standard stuff. saccharine bubblegum type stories and
 ilustrations. you watched the show, is ke that in book
 form.
 the second hall of the railway series are so fucking dark
 and sureal im cominced they were a result of reverend
 wilbur awdry doing copious amounts of lad and having
 hallucinations of his own death.
 frog-and toad-are-triends
 Eecuse me but the rery fest story in the Railway Series is
 about an engine who hides in a turnel and refuses to run
 because he doesn't want to pet his paint job ruined in the
 rain, so railway management seals off the tunnel
 They eventually let him out because another engine
 breaks down or something, but the original plan was to
 just leave him in there forever
 ahulamithbond
 On the show, didnt they also hook up one engine to a
 generator, so he'd never move again? That was iterally
 one of the inesIn, Is on some other post on here. I
 was chilling
 frog-and to
 adare-triends
 a
 Yes! This also happened in the books, to an engine
 refemed to only as "No. 2, but the selevision series
 applied the same scenario to an inwented character
 named "Smudger", in the episode "Granputf.
 "Smudges" said Duke Was a show-off. He rode
 roughly and often came off the rails. I warned him to
 be careful, but he took no notice
 Usten, Dukie" he snared. "Who wories about a few
 spils
 Ha aid, but Smudger lghed
 Unil one day. Manager said he was going to make
 him useful at last. Smudger stopped laughing then"
 Wwwhy What did he do
 "He tumed him ito a generator. He's sil there behind
 our shed. Hell never move again."
 deducecanse
 This is so fucked up
 4
 unclewhisky
 No, sten
 Okay, so we see Ralway Management doing all this shit,
 right, but supposedly ifs so much worse in the Other
 Ralays?i mea, sure, you might get tumed into
 generator or bricked into a tunnel for not doing as yoưre
 told, but at least you're not cut up and sold for parts,
 right? s not so bod on the island of Sodot right?
 a
 Or maybe thara just what Rulway Managament warta the
 engines to think
 Maybe the island of Sodor is the real totalitarian regime,
 and the engine citizens (slaves) are fed propaganda,
 kustrated in belish araes and sulfurie vellows,about how
 ilustrated in helish grays and sulfuric yellows, about how
 bad it is everywhere else, at all the Other Railways.
 You are lucky to be an engine of Seder.
 Railmay Management cares about you
 Tryst Railway Management.
 Stay on Your Track.
 It Could Be So Much Worse.
 connethepaganangel
 Wet the fuck is this train based 1984 bulshit
 Source
 frogand toad are friends
 220440 netes
Thomas and his friends

Thomas and his friends

Tumblr, Control, and Blog: kasperskky YOUR CHILD SEARCHED RESTRICTED TOPICS Sunday, Nov 03, 06:25 PM (time in the child's device time zone) Strairdrac The Netherwatcher searched for "Teaching crabs how to read" which is considered forbidden knowledge under your current parental control settings. DETAILED REPORT Sincerely The Kaspersky team godtsol: F̵̨͙̭̦͈̤̙͙̟̤̩̬̻͍̘̥̫̪̫̺̥̫̩͓͆͆̓́̔̍̍̔̔̓̍̀̋̕͜ͅỌ̵̶̗͕̼̙̲̜̭̬̰͈̥̱̲͇̟͓̫̦̜̬̼͕͎̞͍͙̹͎̟̣̺̫̗̌̊̏́͂̏̾̑̂̓̈́̈͛̀̒̐͒̂̅̾̎̇̽̀͗̾̍̊̾̔̓͊̚͢͝͝ͅR̶̛̛̟̺̺̙͎̹̙̫̲̭̃͋̃͊̏̃̓̅̓̔̈͗̀̄̒̒̒̊̏̔͊̀̈́̕B̴͎̯̘̱̼̤̭̆̏̕͜Ȋ̷̪̞̝̲͓̩̼̤̞̫͖̝̩̈́͐́̃͌̇̂̀͘̚͜͝͠҉̷̢͓̤͖̯̰͎͕̤̹̞̱̯̣̥̘͇̗͇̮̜̣̲̠̺̎̀͊̃̑́̓͑͂͂̕͘D̷̡̧̡͎̠͉͖͚̣̳̯̜͎͙͈͊̈́̓̄̈́̈̓̈́̓͘͘͝͠Ḍ̶̨̖̺̟̮̣̗̩̼̯̗̟̱̝̫͖̂̆̉̔͊̅̽͒̽̆̾̊͑̉̚͝ͅË̸̡͕̣̭͖̘̱̯̏͊̓̊̒̇̏͗̚̚ͅN̴̨̼͇̥̤̮̠̖̰̭̤̞̖̙̟͍͚̣̥͕͒̃̄ ̶̨̛̛̛̼̤̻̪͕͖͖̪͈̲͎̩̟̥͕͌͌̏́̎͋͊̀͒̍̍́̏̕̚͝͠͝ͅK̸̖͔̲͉̲͖̺̥̪͚̰̲̮̘͔͔̳͙̄̍͛͒̈́̂̿̋̓̊̇͐͛̈́̍͊͆͑̆̕͝͠͠ͅN̴̡̨̛͚̬͎̘̼̲̭̺̝̘̭̼͚͙͈͖̥͙̝͕͙̩̖̼͂̂̃̈́̀͒̀̎͛̀́̿͌͋̊̕͠͝ͅǪ̵̪͚̘͇͍͈͉͚͍̅́̃̿͝W̷̨̛͚̭̹̹̘̹̖̟̼̫̎̈́̀̆̀͌͛̋͋̋͒̿̎̌̇̓͘̚͘̕̕͝͠L̵͚̤͇̱̗̟̟͍̈͗͆̒̇̀́͋͛̍͘̕͝͝͝Ȩ̴̰̱̳̟͖̜̼̻͔͎͖̰̤̲̳̽̀̌͌̈́̅̾̓̒͗͗̓̈́̽̉͛̈́̏͐̃͘̕̕͝͝ͅḐ̵͚̠́̍G̸̡̨̛͍̩̮̘̝̩̱͈͓̃̅̽̽̒̀͋̿̀̉̒̏̑͋͊̿́̽̕̕͝Ȩ̶̦̯͓̝͇̗̖̠̜̠̹̰͎͚̗͍̝͌̋̀̃̒̆̍̈́͌
Tumblr, Control, and Blog: kasperskky
 YOUR CHILD SEARCHED
 RESTRICTED TOPICS
 Sunday, Nov 03, 06:25 PM (time in the child's device time zone)
 Strairdrac The Netherwatcher searched for "Teaching crabs how to read"
 which is considered forbidden knowledge under your current parental control
 settings.
 DETAILED REPORT
 Sincerely
 The Kaspersky team
godtsol:
F̵̨͙̭̦͈̤̙͙̟̤̩̬̻͍̘̥̫̪̫̺̥̫̩͓͆͆̓́̔̍̍̔̔̓̍̀̋̕͜ͅỌ̵̶̗͕̼̙̲̜̭̬̰͈̥̱̲͇̟͓̫̦̜̬̼͕͎̞͍͙̹͎̟̣̺̫̗̌̊̏́͂̏̾̑̂̓̈́̈͛̀̒̐͒̂̅̾̎̇̽̀͗̾̍̊̾̔̓͊̚͢͝͝ͅR̶̛̛̟̺̺̙͎̹̙̫̲̭̃͋̃͊̏̃̓̅̓̔̈͗̀̄̒̒̒̊̏̔͊̀̈́̕B̴͎̯̘̱̼̤̭̆̏̕͜Ȋ̷̪̞̝̲͓̩̼̤̞̫͖̝̩̈́͐́̃͌̇̂̀͘̚͜͝͠҉̷̢͓̤͖̯̰͎͕̤̹̞̱̯̣̥̘͇̗͇̮̜̣̲̠̺̎̀͊̃̑́̓͑͂͂̕͘D̷̡̧̡͎̠͉͖͚̣̳̯̜͎͙͈͊̈́̓̄̈́̈̓̈́̓͘͘͝͠Ḍ̶̨̖̺̟̮̣̗̩̼̯̗̟̱̝̫͖̂̆̉̔͊̅̽͒̽̆̾̊͑̉̚͝ͅË̸̡͕̣̭͖̘̱̯̏͊̓̊̒̇̏͗̚̚ͅN̴̨̼͇̥̤̮̠̖̰̭̤̞̖̙̟͍͚̣̥͕͒̃̄ ̶̨̛̛̛̼̤̻̪͕͖͖̪͈̲͎̩̟̥͕͌͌̏́̎͋͊̀͒̍̍́̏̕̚͝͠͝ͅK̸̖͔̲͉̲͖̺̥̪͚̰̲̮̘͔͔̳͙̄̍͛͒̈́̂̿̋̓̊̇͐͛̈́̍͊͆͑̆̕͝͠͠ͅN̴̡̨̛͚̬͎̘̼̲̭̺̝̘̭̼͚͙͈͖̥͙̝͕͙̩̖̼͂̂̃̈́̀͒̀̎͛̀́̿͌͋̊̕͠͝ͅǪ̵̪͚̘͇͍͈͉͚͍̅́̃̿͝W̷̨̛͚̭̹̹̘̹̖̟̼̫̎̈́̀̆̀͌͛̋͋̋͒̿̎̌̇̓͘̚͘̕̕͝͠L̵͚̤͇̱̗̟̟͍̈͗͆̒̇̀́͋͛̍͘̕͝͝͝Ȩ̴̰̱̳̟͖̜̼̻͔͎͖̰̤̲̳̽̀̌͌̈́̅̾̓̒͗͗̓̈́̽̉͛̈́̏͐̃͘̕̕͝͝ͅḐ̵͚̠́̍G̸̡̨̛͍̩̮̘̝̩̱͈͓̃̅̽̽̒̀͋̿̀̉̒̏̑͋͊̿́̽̕̕͝Ȩ̶̦̯͓̝͇̗̖̠̜̠̹̰͎͚̗͍̝͌̋̀̃̒̆̍̈́͌

godtsol: F̵̨͙̭̦͈̤̙͙̟̤̩̬̻͍̘̥̫̪̫̺̥̫̩͓͆͆̓́̔̍̍̔̔̓̍̀̋̕͜ͅỌ̵̶̗͕̼̙̲̜̭̬̰͈̥̱̲͇̟͓̫̦̜̬̼͕͎̞͍͙̹͎̟̣̺̫̗̌̊̏́͂̏̾̑̂̓̈́̈͛̀̒̐͒̂̅̾̎̇̽̀͗̾̍̊̾̔̓͊̚͢͝͝ͅR̶̛̃͋̃͊̏̃̓̅̓̔̈...

Target, Tumblr, and Control: kasperskky YOUR CHILD SEARCHED RESTRICTED TOPICS Sunday, Nov 03, 06:25 PM (time in the child's device time zone) Strairdrac The Netherwatcher searched for "Teaching crabs how to read" which is considered forbidden knowledge under your current parental control settings. DETAILED REPORT Sincerely The Kaspersky team godtsol:F̵̨͙̭̦͈̤̙͙̟̤̩̬̻͍̘̥̫̪̫̺̥̫̩͓͆͆̓́̔̍̍̔̔̓̍̀̋̕͜ͅỌ̵̶̗͕̼̙̲̜̭̬̰͈̥̱̲͇̟͓̫̦̜̬̼͕͎̞͍͙̹͎̟̣̺̫̗̌̊̏́͂̏̾̑̂̓̈́̈͛̀̒̐͒̂̅̾̎̇̽̀͗̾̍̊̾̔̓͊̚͢͝͝ͅR̶̛̛̟̺̺̙͎̹̙̫̲̭̃͋̃͊̏̃̓̅̓̔̈͗̀̄̒̒̒̊̏̔͊̀̈́̕B̴͎̯̘̱̼̤̭̆̏̕͜Ȋ̷̪̞̝̲͓̩̼̤̞̫͖̝̩̈́͐́̃͌̇̂̀͘̚͜͝͠҉̷̢͓̤͖̯̰͎͕̤̹̞̱̯̣̥̘͇̗͇̮̜̣̲̠̺̎̀͊̃̑́̓͑͂͂̕͘D̷̡̧̡͎̠͉͖͚̣̳̯̜͎͙͈͊̈́̓̄̈́̈̓̈́̓͘͘͝͠Ḍ̶̨̖̺̟̮̣̗̩̼̯̗̟̱̝̫͖̂̆̉̔͊̅̽͒̽̆̾̊͑̉̚͝ͅË̸̡͕̣̭͖̘̱̯̏͊̓̊̒̇̏͗̚̚ͅN̴̨̼͇̥̤̮̠̖̰̭̤̞̖̙̟͍͚̣̥͕͒̃̄ ̶̨̛̛̛̼̤̻̪͕͖͖̪͈̲͎̩̟̥͕͌͌̏́̎͋͊̀͒̍̍́̏̕̚͝͠͝ͅK̸̖͔̲͉̲͖̺̥̪͚̰̲̮̘͔͔̳͙̄̍͛͒̈́̂̿̋̓̊̇͐͛̈́̍͊͆͑̆̕͝͠͠ͅN̴̡̨̛͚̬͎̘̼̲̭̺̝̘̭̼͚͙͈͖̥͙̝͕͙̩̖̼͂̂̃̈́̀͒̀̎͛̀́̿͌͋̊̕͠͝ͅǪ̵̪͚̘͇͍͈͉͚͍̅́̃̿͝W̷̨̛͚̭̹̹̘̹̖̟̼̫̎̈́̀̆̀͌͛̋͋̋͒̿̎̌̇̓͘̚͘̕̕͝͠L̵͚̤͇̱̗̟̟͍̈͗͆̒̇̀́͋͛̍͘̕͝͝͝Ȩ̴̰̱̳̟͖̜̼̻͔͎͖̰̤̲̳̽̀̌͌̈́̅̾̓̒͗͗̓̈́̽̉͛̈́̏͐̃͘̕̕͝͝ͅḐ̵͚̠́̍G̸̡̨̛͍̩̮̘̝̩̱͈͓̃̅̽̽̒̀͋̿̀̉̒̏̑͋͊̿́̽̕̕͝Ȩ̶̦̯͓̝͇̗̖̠̜̠̹̰͎͚̗͍̝͌̋̀̃̒̆̍̈́͌
Target, Tumblr, and Control: kasperskky
 YOUR CHILD SEARCHED
 RESTRICTED TOPICS
 Sunday, Nov 03, 06:25 PM (time in the child's device time zone)
 Strairdrac The Netherwatcher searched for "Teaching crabs how to read"
 which is considered forbidden knowledge under your current parental control
 settings.
 DETAILED REPORT
 Sincerely
 The Kaspersky team
godtsol:F̵̨͙̭̦͈̤̙͙̟̤̩̬̻͍̘̥̫̪̫̺̥̫̩͓͆͆̓́̔̍̍̔̔̓̍̀̋̕͜ͅỌ̵̶̗͕̼̙̲̜̭̬̰͈̥̱̲͇̟͓̫̦̜̬̼͕͎̞͍͙̹͎̟̣̺̫̗̌̊̏́͂̏̾̑̂̓̈́̈͛̀̒̐͒̂̅̾̎̇̽̀͗̾̍̊̾̔̓͊̚͢͝͝ͅR̶̛̛̟̺̺̙͎̹̙̫̲̭̃͋̃͊̏̃̓̅̓̔̈͗̀̄̒̒̒̊̏̔͊̀̈́̕B̴͎̯̘̱̼̤̭̆̏̕͜Ȋ̷̪̞̝̲͓̩̼̤̞̫͖̝̩̈́͐́̃͌̇̂̀͘̚͜͝͠҉̷̢͓̤͖̯̰͎͕̤̹̞̱̯̣̥̘͇̗͇̮̜̣̲̠̺̎̀͊̃̑́̓͑͂͂̕͘D̷̡̧̡͎̠͉͖͚̣̳̯̜͎͙͈͊̈́̓̄̈́̈̓̈́̓͘͘͝͠Ḍ̶̨̖̺̟̮̣̗̩̼̯̗̟̱̝̫͖̂̆̉̔͊̅̽͒̽̆̾̊͑̉̚͝ͅË̸̡͕̣̭͖̘̱̯̏͊̓̊̒̇̏͗̚̚ͅN̴̨̼͇̥̤̮̠̖̰̭̤̞̖̙̟͍͚̣̥͕͒̃̄ ̶̨̛̛̛̼̤̻̪͕͖͖̪͈̲͎̩̟̥͕͌͌̏́̎͋͊̀͒̍̍́̏̕̚͝͠͝ͅK̸̖͔̲͉̲͖̺̥̪͚̰̲̮̘͔͔̳͙̄̍͛͒̈́̂̿̋̓̊̇͐͛̈́̍͊͆͑̆̕͝͠͠ͅN̴̡̨̛͚̬͎̘̼̲̭̺̝̘̭̼͚͙͈͖̥͙̝͕͙̩̖̼͂̂̃̈́̀͒̀̎͛̀́̿͌͋̊̕͠͝ͅǪ̵̪͚̘͇͍͈͉͚͍̅́̃̿͝W̷̨̛͚̭̹̹̘̹̖̟̼̫̎̈́̀̆̀͌͛̋͋̋͒̿̎̌̇̓͘̚͘̕̕͝͠L̵͚̤͇̱̗̟̟͍̈͗͆̒̇̀́͋͛̍͘̕͝͝͝Ȩ̴̰̱̳̟͖̜̼̻͔͎͖̰̤̲̳̽̀̌͌̈́̅̾̓̒͗͗̓̈́̽̉͛̈́̏͐̃͘̕̕͝͝ͅḐ̵͚̠́̍G̸̡̨̛͍̩̮̘̝̩̱͈͓̃̅̽̽̒̀͋̿̀̉̒̏̑͋͊̿́̽̕̕͝Ȩ̶̦̯͓̝͇̗̖̠̜̠̹̰͎͚̗͍̝͌̋̀̃̒̆̍̈́͌

godtsol:F̵̨͙̭̦͈̤̙͙̟̤̩̬̻͍̘̥̫̪̫̺̥̫̩͓͆͆̓́̔̍̍̔̔̓̍̀̋̕͜ͅỌ̵̶̗͕̼̙̲̜̭̬̰͈̥̱̲͇̟͓̫̦̜̬̼͕͎̞͍͙̹͎̟̣̺̫̗̌̊̏́͂̏̾̑̂̓̈́̈͛̀̒̐͒̂̅̾̎̇̽̀͗̾̍̊̾̔̓͊̚͢͝͝ͅR̶̛̃͋̃͊̏̃̓̅̓̔̈͗...

80s, Africa, and Books: GUIDE TO FIGURING OUT THE AGE OF AN UNDATED WORLD MAP (ASSUMING ITS COrMPLETE, LABELEDN ENGUSH, AND DETAILED ENOUGH) DO ANY OF THESE EXIST? NO INDEPENDENT CANADA US TERRITORY OF ALASKA TOKYO ISTANBUL OR CONSTANTINOPLE? START DOES THE SOVET UNION EXIST? CONSTANTINOPLE NETHERSTANBUL THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE? 15 MOST OF WEST AFRICA A GIANT FRENCH BLOB? SAUDI YES 1805 OR EARUER (BEFORE THIS POINT THE MODERN IDEAOF ACOMPLETE POLITICAL MAP OF THEWORLD GETS HARD TOAPPLY ARABIA? THE SOVIET UNION? NO ZAIRE? OR HONG KONG (UK DOES THE OTTOMAN 1922-1932 YES EPIRE EXIST? SOUTH AFRICA? NO YES HOW MANY VIETNAMS ARE THERE? 992-96 AUSTRIA HUNGARY? NORTH KOREA? SAINT TRIMBLES ISLAND SERBIA/MONTENEGRO ARE.. ONE COUNTRY TO COUNTRIES NOT IS JAN MAYEN PART OF THE KINGDOMOF NORUAY? THE UNITED STATES? NO YES HOU SURE ARE YOU THAT THIS MAP IS IN ENGLISH? WHAT? PAKISTAN? BANGLADESH? YES NOIMADE THAT ONE UP LENINGRAD? NOYES 1919-23 1124-29 HOU MANY SUDANS ARE THERE? RHODESIA? EAST TIMOR? NO YES 972-75 ALBANIA? CAN YOU SEE THE FAMIUAR CONTINENTS? NO YES 1910-12 1915-18 1997-2001 2002-06 TEXAS IS.. PARTOF MEXICO INDEPEN-THE US DENT 834-45 2007- HOW MANY GERMANYS ARE THERE? TUO CAMBODIA? PARTOF THIS SOUNDS LIKE A PHYSICAL MAP OR SATELLITE PHOTO "COLORADO OR "DANGER-RADIOACTIVE EXCLUSION ZONE-AVOID? DANGER YES ONE ONE, BUT ITS HUGE 1941-45 IS CRIMEA DISPUTED? ISNORUAY PART OF SUEDEN? YES 18%-1905 1906-09 h-9h6l YES, THATS IT ERITREA IS PARTOF.. EHОРА 1952-53 FLORIDA IS PARTOF.. COLORADO 204-2 PERSIA OR IRAN? 2012-13 RIVERS SIRION OR ANDUIN? ITALY SPAIN THE US RAN PERSIA DOES THE UARNING MENTION THE SPIDERS? IS LAKE CHAD MISSING? 1935-40 1930-34 IS BOLIVIA LANDLOCKED? JIMMY CARTER IS. BENGATTACKED BY A T FINE GANT SUMING RPESIT APRIL 20 1979 VENEZUELA ANDOR ECUADOR? NO YES 1818-29 1830-33 THE UNITED ARAB REPUBLIC? NO 1954-57 1958-60 PARAGUAY? CANADA IS.. MISSING FINE A PIECE 1948 YES 1806-10 18-17 2023 ORLATER 2022 CAIR PARAVEL? 1884-95 THE SINAI IS PART OF WHAT COUNTRY? ISRAELT MOSTLY ISRAEL MOSTLY EGYPT EGYPT 1980 IS THE ARAL SEA MISSING? 15 THE AREA SOUTH OF LAKE VICTORIA. TANGANYIKA 1961-64 MOSSFLOUER? MORDOR? BUDA AND PEST OR BUDAPEST? 1981 1976-79 DOES RUSSIA BORDER THE SEA OF JAPAN? TANZANIA BRITISH 1965-71 960 1970s-90s 20O0st REDUALL WHATS THE CAPITALOF MICRONESIA? KOLONIA BUDA AND BUDAPEST PEST PAUKIR 1873-83 1858-67 IS THE WORLD ON THE BACK OF A TURTUE? NO DISCWORLD THE TOUN ON 1-25 BETUEEN ALBUQUERQUE AND EL PASO IS.. HOT SPRINGS TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES 1868-72 NOMENOR? YES NO LATE SECOND AGE BELERIAND? REPUBLIC OF THE UPPER VOLTA OR BURKINA FASO? THE USS SOUTHERN BORDER LOOKS. WEIRD FIRST EARLY AGE SECOND AGE NORMAL 854-56 1948-49 1950-52 UPPER VOLTA BURKNA FASO 1982-84 846-53 ARE YOU SURE THIS IS A MAP? CALORMEN? 1985-88 THE FOREST EASTOF THE MISTY MOUNTAINS IS.. IS IT TRYING HOU FAR EAST DO THE AMERICAN PRAIRIES REACH? THE MISSISSIPPINEBRASKA 1830s-80s (NUMBER OF YEMENS)+(NUMBER OF GERTMANYS) FOUR 1989-EARLY 1990 TO BITE YOU? ? INDIANA UNAT PRAIRIES? GREENJOODI MRKJOOD THE GREAT EARLY THIRD AGE THE UOOD OF GREENLEAVES THREE MID-1990 BEFORE 1830 LATE THIRD AGE FOURTH AGE LATE1990-199 DID YOU MAKE IT YOURSELF? WEIRD RECURSIVE HEAVEN? 15 THERE A BIG LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF SOUTHERN CAUFORNIA? (CREATED BY MISTAKE) I5 THERE A BIG LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF GHANA? (CREATED ON PURPOSE) NO 1920s-505 LOTTA 1SLANDS? IF YOU LET IT GO UHAT DOES IT DO? I5 IT LARGER THAN A BREADBOX? YES TUBA STAPLER THE SAME BERUNA FORDBRIDGE HISSES AND RUNS AWAY CAT SCREECHES AND FLAPS ARDUND THE ROOn BREAKING THINGE5 YES ONE OF THE THE RANDOM LAST LATER BOOKS BATE NO YES ABOUT ITS VERY NICE. THANK YOU RELION PRINCE UEHE CASPIAN WARDROBE DALIN TREACER YES SEAGULL BREADBOX 1860s-1900s 1960s-70s 1910s land-of-maps: this helps a lot
80s, Africa, and Books: GUIDE TO FIGURING OUT THE AGE OF AN UNDATED WORLD MAP
 (ASSUMING ITS COrMPLETE, LABELEDN ENGUSH, AND DETAILED ENOUGH)
 DO ANY OF THESE EXIST?
 NO INDEPENDENT CANADA
 US TERRITORY OF ALASKA
 TOKYO
 ISTANBUL OR CONSTANTINOPLE?
 START
 DOES THE SOVET
 UNION EXIST?
 CONSTANTINOPLE NETHERSTANBUL
 THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE?
 15 MOST OF WEST AFRICA
 A GIANT FRENCH BLOB?
 SAUDI
 YES
 1805 OR EARUER
 (BEFORE THIS POINT
 THE MODERN IDEAOF
 ACOMPLETE POLITICAL
 MAP OF THEWORLD
 GETS HARD TOAPPLY
 ARABIA?
 THE
 SOVIET
 UNION? NO
 ZAIRE?
 OR HONG KONG (UK
 DOES THE OTTOMAN
 1922-1932
 YES
 EPIRE EXIST?
 SOUTH AFRICA?
 NO
 YES
 HOW MANY VIETNAMS
 ARE THERE?
 992-96
 AUSTRIA
 HUNGARY?
 NORTH KOREA?
 SAINT
 TRIMBLES
 ISLAND
 SERBIA/MONTENEGRO ARE..
 ONE COUNTRY TO COUNTRIES
 NOT IS JAN MAYEN PART OF
 THE KINGDOMOF NORUAY?
 THE UNITED
 STATES?
 NO YES
 HOU SURE ARE
 YOU THAT THIS MAP
 IS IN ENGLISH?
 WHAT?
 PAKISTAN?
 BANGLADESH?
 YES
 NOIMADE
 THAT ONE UP
 LENINGRAD?
 NOYES
 1919-23 1124-29
 HOU MANY SUDANS
 ARE THERE?
 RHODESIA?
 EAST TIMOR?
 NO
 YES
 972-75
 ALBANIA?
 CAN YOU SEE
 THE FAMIUAR
 CONTINENTS?
 NO YES
 1910-12 1915-18
 1997-2001 2002-06
 TEXAS IS..
 PARTOF
 MEXICO INDEPEN-THE US
 DENT
 834-45
 2007-
 HOW MANY GERMANYS ARE THERE?
 TUO
 CAMBODIA?
 PARTOF
 THIS SOUNDS LIKE
 A PHYSICAL MAP OR
 SATELLITE PHOTO
 "COLORADO OR
 "DANGER-RADIOACTIVE
 EXCLUSION ZONE-AVOID?
 DANGER
 YES
 ONE ONE, BUT ITS HUGE
 1941-45
 IS CRIMEA
 DISPUTED?
 ISNORUAY
 PART OF SUEDEN?
 YES
 18%-1905 1906-09
 h-9h6l
 YES, THATS IT
 ERITREA IS PARTOF..
 EHОРА
 1952-53
 FLORIDA IS PARTOF..
 COLORADO
 204-2
 PERSIA OR IRAN?
 2012-13
 RIVERS SIRION
 OR ANDUIN?
 ITALY
 SPAIN
 THE US
 RAN
 PERSIA
 DOES THE UARNING
 MENTION THE SPIDERS?
 IS LAKE
 CHAD MISSING?
 1935-40
 1930-34
 IS BOLIVIA
 LANDLOCKED?
 JIMMY CARTER IS.
 BENGATTACKED BY A T FINE
 GANT SUMING RPESIT
 APRIL 20 1979
 VENEZUELA
 ANDOR
 ECUADOR?
 NO YES
 1818-29 1830-33
 THE UNITED
 ARAB REPUBLIC?
 NO
 1954-57 1958-60
 PARAGUAY?
 CANADA IS..
 MISSING FINE
 A PIECE
 1948
 YES
 1806-10 18-17
 2023 ORLATER
 2022
 CAIR PARAVEL?
 1884-95
 THE SINAI IS PART OF WHAT COUNTRY?
 ISRAELT MOSTLY ISRAEL MOSTLY EGYPT EGYPT
 1980
 IS THE ARAL
 SEA MISSING?
 15 THE AREA SOUTH OF LAKE VICTORIA.
 TANGANYIKA
 1961-64
 MOSSFLOUER?
 MORDOR?
 BUDA AND PEST
 OR BUDAPEST?
 1981
 1976-79
 DOES RUSSIA BORDER
 THE SEA OF JAPAN?
 TANZANIA
 BRITISH
 1965-71
 960
 1970s-90s 20O0st
 REDUALL
 WHATS THE CAPITALOF MICRONESIA?
 KOLONIA
 BUDA AND BUDAPEST
 PEST
 PAUKIR
 1873-83
 1858-67
 IS THE WORLD ON THE
 BACK OF A TURTUE?
 NO
 DISCWORLD
 THE TOUN ON 1-25 BETUEEN
 ALBUQUERQUE AND EL PASO IS..
 HOT SPRINGS TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES
 1868-72
 NOMENOR?
 YES NO
 LATE
 SECOND AGE
 BELERIAND?
 REPUBLIC OF THE UPPER
 VOLTA OR BURKINA FASO?
 THE USS SOUTHERN BORDER LOOKS.
 WEIRD
 FIRST EARLY
 AGE SECOND AGE
 NORMAL
 854-56
 1948-49
 1950-52
 UPPER VOLTA BURKNA FASO
 1982-84
 846-53
 ARE YOU SURE
 THIS IS A MAP?
 CALORMEN?
 1985-88
 THE FOREST EASTOF THE
 MISTY MOUNTAINS IS..
 IS IT TRYING
 HOU FAR EAST DO THE AMERICAN PRAIRIES REACH?
 THE MISSISSIPPINEBRASKA
 1830s-80s
 (NUMBER OF YEMENS)+(NUMBER OF GERTMANYS)
 FOUR
 1989-EARLY 1990
 TO BITE YOU?
 ?
 INDIANA
 UNAT PRAIRIES?
 GREENJOODI MRKJOOD
 THE GREAT
 EARLY
 THIRD AGE
 THE UOOD OF
 GREENLEAVES
 THREE
 MID-1990
 BEFORE
 1830
 LATE
 THIRD AGE FOURTH AGE
 LATE1990-199
 DID YOU MAKE
 IT YOURSELF?
 WEIRD
 RECURSIVE
 HEAVEN?
 15 THERE A BIG
 LAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF
 SOUTHERN CAUFORNIA?
 (CREATED BY MISTAKE)
 I5 THERE A BIG LAKE IN
 THE MIDDLE OF GHANA?
 (CREATED ON PURPOSE)
 NO
 1920s-505
 LOTTA
 1SLANDS?
 IF YOU LET IT GO UHAT DOES IT DO?
 I5 IT LARGER
 THAN A BREADBOX?
 YES
 TUBA STAPLER THE SAME
 BERUNA
 FORDBRIDGE
 HISSES AND
 RUNS AWAY
 CAT
 SCREECHES AND FLAPS
 ARDUND THE ROOn
 BREAKING THINGE5
 YES
 ONE OF THE THE
 RANDOM LAST
 LATER BOOKS BATE
 NO YES
 ABOUT
 ITS VERY NICE.
 THANK YOU
 RELION PRINCE
 UEHE CASPIAN
 WARDROBE
 DALIN
 TREACER
 YES
 SEAGULL
 BREADBOX
 1860s-1900s
 1960s-70s
 1910s
land-of-maps:

this helps a lot

land-of-maps: this helps a lot

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Shit, Target, and Tumblr: meglm: Previously on “The ADVENTURE Zone!”  These ruff boys went through some shit!
Shit, Target, and Tumblr: meglm:

Previously on “The ADVENTURE Zone!” 
These ruff boys went through some shit!

meglm: Previously on “The ADVENTURE Zone!”  These ruff boys went through some shit!

Comfortable, Gangsta, and Head: toggl.com YOU WANT TO WORK FOR A So LET'S POP THE HOOD AND SEE WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE IT TAKES TO TECH COMPANY? KEEP THE ENGINE RUNNING: KITCHEN FOUNTAIN OFFICE OF NINJA Qurifed GROWTH OUTDO LAND 9HAXIMUM lead ENPUTO 3 CFO developer face PRODUCT 5 LEAD Snace free REVELATION FRONT EN6 1) 0BM/SEO LEADGEN CAMP SUPPORT (8 CEO NERF GUN WAR ZONE 2 CUSTOMER SOCIAL MEDIA HIPSTER incoming tickets 10 SERVERS IN-HOUSE DESIGNER 11 BACKEND 9ENGINEER 15 MART VIRKUS THE CAST овм/SEO 1) LEADGEN 2 CUSTOMER Front line troops with nerves of steel. Customer support Black wizards of the Internet, skilled in the dark art of commandos have an uncanny ability to say "no" without it sounding like "no". Mostly peaceful. generating clicks, traffic and conversions. What, you think you found this comic by chance? 3 CFO HIPSTER The vault keeper. Tasked with maintaining fiscal responsibility. Also has to say "no" a lot, but lets silly expense requests slide occasionally to maintain peace and illusion of democracy Communicates in GIFS exclusively Social media hipsters are the only people who think "tweeting" counts as a skill on LinkedIn (and will ask to endorse it relentlessly). 6FRONT-N DEVS 5 LEAD A.K.A. "not actual engineers" in backend vocab. Heavily into classic rock or gangsta rap (or both). Obscurity of their hobbies is only matched by that of their T-shirt slogans. The buck stops here. Has keyboard shortcuts for phrases like "do it", "how hard can it be?" and "no." Not very peaceful. </Head Bady В СЕо OFFICE A.K.A. "The Big Cheese" CEOS feel most comfortable Ever wonder where your plane tickets, free snacks and gadgets come from? That's the work of an Office Ninja. The best Ninjas operate when facing challenges, so expect big changes (or a surprise product launch) when things start working too smoothly without ever being noticed. 9 KEND 10 SERVERS The non-glamorous techie. A watchful protector and a silent knight they keep the business up and running. He's the hero the company deserves (but not the one it needs) The only ones working 24/7. Go servers! 11) DESIGNER Arare beast, as most creatives prefer to roam free, hopping from one project to another. It's best to give them creative control to reduce chance of escape or violent rebellion. toggl.com Mart Virkus@ blog.toggl.com more general IT Company than programming but I hope it still fits here
Comfortable, Gangsta, and Head: toggl.com
 YOU WANT TO WORK
 FOR A
 So
 LET'S POP THE HOOD
 AND SEE WHAT KIND OF
 PEOPLE IT TAKES TO
 TECH COMPANY?
 KEEP THE ENGINE RUNNING:
 KITCHEN
 FOUNTAIN
 OFFICE
 OF
 NINJA
 Qurifed GROWTH
 OUTDO
 LAND
 9HAXIMUM
 lead
 ENPUTO
 3 CFO
 developer
 face
 PRODUCT
 5 LEAD
 Snace
 free
 REVELATION
 FRONT EN6
 1) 0BM/SEO
 LEADGEN
 CAMP
 SUPPORT
 (8 CEO
 NERF GUN
 WAR ZONE
 2 CUSTOMER
 SOCIAL MEDIA
 HIPSTER
 incoming
 tickets
 10 SERVERS
 IN-HOUSE
 DESIGNER 11
 BACKEND
 9ENGINEER
 15 MART VIRKUS
 THE CAST
 овм/SEO
 1) LEADGEN
 2 CUSTOMER
 Front line troops with nerves
 of steel. Customer support
 Black wizards of the Internet,
 skilled in the dark art of
 commandos have an uncanny
 ability to say "no" without it
 sounding like "no". Mostly
 peaceful.
 generating clicks, traffic and
 conversions. What, you think
 you found this comic by
 chance?
 3 CFO
 HIPSTER
 The vault keeper. Tasked with
 maintaining fiscal
 responsibility. Also has to say
 "no" a lot, but lets silly expense
 requests slide occasionally to
 maintain peace and illusion of
 democracy
 Communicates in GIFS exclusively
 Social media hipsters are the only
 people who think "tweeting" counts
 as a skill on LinkedIn (and will ask to
 endorse it relentlessly).
 6FRONT-N
 DEVS
 5 LEAD
 A.K.A. "not actual engineers" in
 backend vocab. Heavily into
 classic rock or gangsta rap (or
 both). Obscurity of their hobbies
 is only matched by that of their
 T-shirt slogans.
 The buck stops here. Has
 keyboard shortcuts for
 phrases like "do it", "how hard
 can it be?" and "no." Not very
 peaceful.
 </Head
 Bady
 В СЕо
 OFFICE
 A.K.A. "The Big Cheese"
 CEOS feel most comfortable
 Ever wonder where your
 plane tickets, free snacks and
 gadgets come from? That's
 the work of an Office Ninja.
 The best Ninjas operate
 when facing challenges, so
 expect big changes (or a
 surprise product launch)
 when things start working
 too smoothly
 without ever being noticed.
 9 KEND
 10 SERVERS
 The non-glamorous techie.
 A watchful protector and a silent
 knight they keep the business
 up and running. He's the hero
 the company deserves (but not
 the one it needs)
 The only ones working 24/7.
 Go servers!
 11) DESIGNER
 Arare beast, as most creatives
 prefer to roam free, hopping
 from one project to another. It's
 best to give them creative control
 to reduce chance of escape or
 violent rebellion.
 toggl.com
 Mart Virkus@ blog.toggl.com
more general IT Company than programming but I hope it still fits here

more general IT Company than programming but I hope it still fits here