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Beautiful, Bored, and Head: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
Beautiful, Bored, and Head: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

Bruh, Christmas, and College: October 19 at 11:11am In highschool I wonder why they pushed college on so hard instead of trades? They didn't tell me union plumbers can make $1,600 a week with no OT and NO us DEGREE....or that truck drivers can make 6 bands a week if they buy their own truck w/NO DEGREE? OR that traveling welders can make 100k a year with NO DEGREE. they made it seem like college was the only way to be successful. Like Comment Share and 352 others 495 Shares J I'm a weld Inspector, traveling inspectors can make 6 figures easy. Oct 19 at 11:14am Love 2 Reply Delete plied 3 replies Jo NO That's awesome bro .I'm a truck driver and we can make 6 figures as well with the right company. I just wonder why they ain't tell me about this shit in highschool. They made it seem like college was the only way Oct 19 at 11:16am Edited Like 3 Reply More justgot1: apocalycious: halfmoonhead: themightyglamazon: systlin: roamingaimlesly: triggeredmedia: It’s almost as if schools push and ideology that benefits schools.  Bruh, trades are in high fucking demand right now too. Between now and 2020 there are suppose to be 300,000 more jobs and that’s just for welder. Shit, they’ll pay for you to learn how to do it. I just finished high school and got a untility job in a factory and I have almost no experience. They’re gonna train me for everything plus it has full health benefits. Trades are fucking great. My husband is a welder, and is very very good at it. He got hired by a locksmith company pretty much just by walking in and going “Yes I can weld.” All of the other guys there were great at locksmithing, but none of them were trained welders, and they needed someone who could build custom doors and frames.  They trained him to do lock stuff too, so now he can weld AND pick locks.  The owner of the company, when he handed out Christmas bonuses, looked at him and went “Dude we literally cannot fire you because we’d be screwed so here’s your bonus and also we’re giving you a raise.” Welders are in desperate demand.  Blows kisses to this post. Anyway, learn a trade, unionize, wear your PPE, memorize OSHA’s phone number. My husband went to a fast track auto school and made almost 80k at his last job. Benefits are shit if you’re in a trade with no union but the money can be really good There are construction projects here in Portland, OR that sit around taking months and months longer than they need to because there aren’t enough trades people for all the projects.  It’s interesting to drive past the same apartment building where nothing seems to be happening for like a year, and then suddenly in a few weeks it all seems to finish up at once. I see these posts a lot but I always wonder which trades have a lot of women and/or are friendly to women wanting to enter them? Because that’s still an issue in some trades.
Bruh, Christmas, and College: October 19 at 11:11am
 In highschool I wonder why they pushed college on
 so hard instead of trades? They didn't tell me union
 plumbers can make $1,600 a week with no OT and NO
 us
 DEGREE....or that truck drivers can make 6 bands a
 week if they buy their own truck w/NO DEGREE? OR
 that traveling welders can make 100k a year with NO
 DEGREE. they made it seem like college was the
 only way to be successful.
 Like
 Comment
 Share
 and 352 others
 495 Shares
 J
 I'm a weld Inspector, traveling inspectors can
 make 6 figures easy.
 Oct 19 at 11:14am Love 2 Reply Delete
 plied 3 replies
 Jo
 NO
 That's awesome bro
 .I'm a truck driver
 and we can make 6 figures as well with the right
 company. I just wonder why they ain't tell me
 about this shit in highschool. They made it
 seem like college was the only way
 Oct 19 at 11:16am Edited Like
 3 Reply More
justgot1:

apocalycious:
halfmoonhead:

themightyglamazon:

systlin:

roamingaimlesly:

triggeredmedia:

It’s almost as if schools push and ideology that benefits schools. 

Bruh, trades are in high fucking demand right now too. Between now and 2020 there are suppose to be 300,000 more jobs and that’s just for welder.
Shit, they’ll pay for you to learn how to do it.

I just finished high school and got a untility job in a factory and I have almost no experience. They’re gonna train me for everything plus it has full health benefits.
Trades are fucking great.

My husband is a welder, and is very very good at it. He got hired by a locksmith company pretty much just by walking in and going “Yes I can weld.”
All of the other guys there were great at locksmithing, but none of them were trained welders, and they needed someone who could build custom doors and frames. 
They trained him to do lock stuff too, so now he can weld AND pick locks. 
The owner of the company, when he handed out Christmas bonuses, looked at him and went “Dude we literally cannot fire you because we’d be screwed so here’s your bonus and also we’re giving you a raise.”
Welders are in desperate demand. 

Blows kisses to this post.

Anyway, learn a trade, unionize, wear your PPE, memorize OSHA’s phone number.  


My husband went to a fast track auto school and made almost 80k at his last job. Benefits are shit if you’re in a trade with no union but the money can be really good 

There are construction projects here in Portland, OR that sit around taking months and months longer than they need to because there aren’t enough trades people for all the projects.  It’s interesting to drive past the same apartment building where nothing seems to be happening for like a year, and then suddenly in a few weeks it all seems to finish up at once.


I see these posts a lot but I always wonder which trades have a lot of women and/or are friendly to women wanting to enter them? Because that’s still an issue in some trades.

justgot1: apocalycious: halfmoonhead: themightyglamazon: systlin: roamingaimlesly: triggeredmedia: It’s almost as if schools push and ...

Comfortable, Deer, and Hello: hello-kitty-senpai There is a specific and terrifying difference between "never were" monsters and "are not anymore" monsters The thing that was not a deer implies a creature which mimics a deer but imperfectly and the details which are wrong are what makes it terrifying The thing that was not a deer anymore" on the other hand implies a thing that USED to be a deer before it was somehow mutated, possessed, parasitically controlled or reanimated improperly and what makes THAT terrifying is the details that are still right and recognizable poking out of all the wrong and horrible malformations hello-kitty-senpai hey I totally forgot the 3rd type, which is "Is Not Anymore And Maybe Never Was" monsters "The thing which was no longer a deer and maybe never was" implies a creature that, at first glance, completely appears to be a deer, but over time degrades very slowly until you realize (probably too late) that it is not a deer anymore, and had you seen it in this state first, you wouldn't have recognized it as a deer at all, and there's a decent chance that it was never actually a deer to begin with but only a very good mimic, and what makes this one scary is the slow change from everything being right to everything being wrong, happening slowly enough that you don't even notice it until its too late, as welll as the fact that something now so clearly not a deer could have fooled you to begin with katekarl And the fourth type, which is, "I dunno, but it sure ain't a deer. Which implies complete confusion about what the creature could be, to the point that even a person as comfortable in this world as someone who would use the word ain't unironically is uncertain, which should horrify you to the deepest depths of your soul. goblinfruit Don't forget the fifth type, the that's a weird looking dog," implying that while the creature has an appearance that slips beyond our ken, that raises the tiny hairs at the back of our necks and limbs, that makes our lungs rattle and hearts constrict,... personality-wise, it is a good boy Source: hello-kitty-senpai 52,450 notes #anymore #never #were #notNever were, not anymore - #Anymore #notNever
Comfortable, Deer, and Hello: hello-kitty-senpai
 There is a specific and terrifying difference between "never were" monsters and
 "are not anymore" monsters
 The thing that was not a deer implies a creature which mimics a deer but
 imperfectly and the details which are wrong are what makes it terrifying
 The thing that was not a deer anymore" on the other hand implies a thing that
 USED to be a deer before it was somehow mutated, possessed, parasitically
 controlled or reanimated improperly and what makes THAT terrifying is the
 details that are still right and recognizable poking out of all the wrong and
 horrible malformations
 hello-kitty-senpai
 hey I totally
 forgot the 3rd type, which is "Is Not Anymore And
 Maybe Never Was" monsters
 "The thing which was no longer a deer and maybe never was" implies a creature
 that, at first glance, completely appears to be a deer, but over time degrades
 very slowly until you realize (probably too late) that it is not a deer anymore, and
 had you seen it in this state first, you wouldn't have recognized it as a deer at all,
 and there's a decent chance that it was never actually a deer to begin with but
 only a very good mimic, and what makes this one scary is the slow change from
 everything being right to everything being wrong, happening slowly enough that
 you don't even notice it until its too late, as welll as the fact that something now
 so clearly not a deer could have fooled you to begin with
 katekarl
 And the fourth type, which is, "I dunno, but it sure ain't a deer. Which implies
 complete confusion about what the creature could be, to the point that even a
 person as comfortable in this world as someone who would use the word ain't
 unironically is uncertain, which should horrify you to the deepest depths of your
 soul.
 goblinfruit
 Don't forget the fifth type, the that's a weird looking dog," implying that while the
 creature has an appearance that slips beyond our ken, that raises the tiny hairs
 at the back of our necks and limbs, that makes our lungs rattle and hearts
 constrict,... personality-wise, it is a good boy
 Source: hello-kitty-senpai
 52,450 notes
#anymore #never #were #notNever were, not anymore - #Anymore #notNever

#anymore #never #were #notNever were, not anymore - #Anymore #notNever

Girls, Love, and Smell: The water hears and understands. six CROWS of The ice does not forgive PART 1 SHADOW BUSINESS oost had two problems: the moon and his moustache. He was supposed to be making his rounds at the Hoede house, but for the last fifteen minutes, he'd been hovering around the south-east wall of the Eardens, trying to think of something clever and romantic to say to Anya If only Anya's eyes wete blue like the sea or green like lovely, an emerald. Instead, her e yes were brown dreamy melted chocolate brown! Rabbit fur brown! Just tell her she's got skin like moonlight," his friend Pieter had said. *Girls love that." A perfect solution, but the Ketterdam weather was not cooperating There'd been no breeze off the harbour that day, and a.grey milk fog had wreathed the city's canals and crooked alleys in damp. Even here among the mansions of the Geldstraat, the air hung thick with the smell of fish and bilge water, and smoke from the refineries on the citys outer islands had smeared the night sky in briny hate. The full moon looked less 1ike a jewel than a yellowy blister in need of lancing. Maybe he could compliment Anya's laugh! Except he'd never heard het laugh. He wasn't very good with jokes. Joost glanced at his reflection in one of the glass panels set into the double doors that led from the house to the side gatden. His mother was right. buffonia:               six of crows by leigh bardugo
Girls, Love, and Smell: The water
 hears and
 understands.
 six
 CROWS
 of
 The ice
 does not
 forgive

 PART
 1
 SHADOW
 BUSINESS
 oost had two problems:
 the moon and his moustache. He was
 supposed to be making his rounds at the
 Hoede house, but for the last fifteen minutes, he'd
 been hovering around the south-east wall of the
 Eardens, trying to think of something clever
 and romantic to say to Anya
 If only Anya's eyes wete blue like the sea or green like
 lovely,
 an emerald. Instead, her e yes were brown
 dreamy melted chocolate brown! Rabbit fur brown!
 Just tell her she's got skin like moonlight," his friend
 Pieter had said. *Girls love that."
 A perfect solution, but the Ketterdam weather was not
 cooperating There'd been no breeze off the harbour
 that day, and a.grey milk fog had wreathed the city's
 canals and crooked alleys in damp.
 Even here among the mansions of the Geldstraat, the air
 hung thick with the smell of fish
 and bilge water, and smoke from the refineries on the
 citys outer islands had smeared the night sky in briny
 hate. The full moon looked less 1ike a jewel than a
 yellowy blister in need of lancing.
 Maybe he could compliment Anya's laugh! Except he'd
 never heard het laugh. He wasn't very good with jokes.
 Joost glanced at his reflection in one of
 the glass panels set into the double doors that led from
 the house to the side gatden. His mother was right.
buffonia:               six of crows by leigh bardugo

buffonia:               six of crows by leigh bardugo