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The Weather Channel: robotmango it's ninety-nine degrees outside, four fuck-thousand percent humidity, and my husband was like, "i'm gonna go for a bike ride." and i was like "why. no. why don't put us on the news like that. local fool collapses on unnecessary journey don't do it." so he says he doesn't want to "hide in the house" because the sun is shining. bruh. honeybruh. "the sun is shining" does not cover it. its hot outside. its motherfucking hot as fuck outside. our outdoor plants have been crying into their hands all week. whole cars are melting into the sewer. our fucking patio umbrella developed sentience to ask me for lemonade this mornin awed-frog @robotmango, you need to work for the weather forecast this was both hilarious and so vivid it made me stand up and get some iced tea robotmango this is a great idea, thank you. here goes. my audition tape for the weather channel. dearly beloved. we are gathered here today to have a fucking funeral for the outdoors. it had a good run, with all its creeks and clouds and shit pretty great. now it's ten-thirty at night but still ninety-two asshole-sweating degrees and humid as fuck. everything is hot and slimy, like being a "borrower" that got trapped inside a bottle of shampoo and then accidentally microwaved you can see on my doppler radar that nothing is moving around out there because everything is probably dead. the only alive thing is the mosquito currently trying to drill a hole in my leg. no surprise that all the shitbag mosquitos are fine, since the thermostat of hell is always at the devil's preferred temperature. this forecast has gotten away from me a little, but in conclusion fuck the sun scarylullabies I think I've reblogged this before, but "the thermostat of hell is always at the devil's preferred temperature" is fucking poetry heywetotheotherworld but in conclusion, fuck the sun Why isnt OP on the Weather Channel yet?
The Weather Channel: robotmango
 it's ninety-nine degrees outside, four fuck-thousand percent humidity, and my
 husband was like, "i'm gonna go for a bike ride." and i was like "why. no. why
 don't put us on the news like that. local fool collapses on unnecessary journey
 don't do it." so he says he doesn't want to "hide in the house" because the sun
 is shining. bruh. honeybruh. "the sun is shining" does not cover it. its hot
 outside. its motherfucking hot as fuck outside. our outdoor plants have been
 crying into their hands all week. whole cars are melting into the sewer. our
 fucking patio umbrella developed sentience to ask me for lemonade this
 mornin
 awed-frog
 @robotmango, you need to work for the weather forecast this was both
 hilarious and so vivid it made me stand up and get some iced tea
 robotmango
 this is a great idea, thank you. here goes. my audition tape for the weather
 channel. dearly beloved. we are gathered here today to have a fucking funeral
 for the outdoors. it had a good run, with all its creeks and clouds and shit
 pretty great. now it's ten-thirty at night but still ninety-two asshole-sweating
 degrees and humid as fuck. everything is hot and slimy, like being a "borrower"
 that got trapped inside a bottle of shampoo and then accidentally microwaved
 you can see on my doppler radar that nothing is moving around out there
 because everything is probably dead. the only alive thing is the mosquito
 currently trying to drill a hole in my leg. no surprise that all the shitbag
 mosquitos are fine, since the thermostat of hell is always at the devil's preferred
 temperature. this forecast has gotten away from me a little, but in conclusion
 fuck the sun
 scarylullabies
 I think I've reblogged this before, but "the thermostat of hell is always at the
 devil's preferred temperature" is fucking poetry
 heywetotheotherworld
 but in conclusion, fuck the sun
Why isnt OP on the Weather Channel yet?

Why isnt OP on the Weather Channel yet?

The Weather Channel: gif-finder.com So this guy he's figured out how to scoot on water. I've seen a little segment on the Weather Channel about this.
The Weather Channel: gif-finder.com
So this guy he's figured out how to scoot on water. I've seen a little segment on the Weather Channel about this.

So this guy he's figured out how to scoot on water. I've seen a little segment on the Weather Channel about this.

The Weather Channel: m4ge ollivander Follow robotmango it's ninety-nine degrees outside, four fuck-thousand percent humidity, and my husband was like, Tm gonna go for a bike ride." and i was like "why no. why. don't put us on the news like that. local fool collapses on unnecessary journey don't do it." so he says he doesn't want to "hide in the house" because the sun is shining. bruh. honeybruh. "the sun is shining" does not cover it. its hot outside. its motherfucking hot as fuck outside. our outdoor plants have been crying into their hands all week. whole cars are melting into the sewer. our fucking patio umbrella developed sentience to ask me for lemonade this morning awed-frog @robotmango, you need to work for the weather forecast - this was both hilarious and so vivid it made me stand up and get some iced tea. robotmango this is a great idea, thank you. here goes. my audition tape for the weather channel. dearly beloved. we are gathered here today to have a fucking funeral for the outdoors. it had a good run, with all its creeks and clouds and shit. pretty great. now it's ten-thirty at night but still ninety-two asshole-sweating degrees and humid as fuck. everything is hot and slimy, like being a "borrower that got trapped inside a bottle of shampoo and then accidentally microwaved. you can see on my doppler radar that nothing is moving around out there because everything is probably dead. the only alive thing is the mosquito currently trying to drill a hole in my leg. no surprise that all the shitbag mosquitos are fine, since the thermostat of hell is always at the devil's preferred temperature. this forecast has gotten away from me a little, but in conclusion fuck the sun Source: robotmango 124,122 notes A fuck the sun
The Weather Channel: m4ge ollivander Follow
 robotmango
 it's ninety-nine degrees outside, four fuck-thousand percent humidity, and my
 husband was like, Tm gonna go for a bike ride." and i was like "why no. why.
 don't put us on the news like that. local fool collapses on unnecessary journey
 don't do it." so he says he doesn't want to "hide in the house" because the sun
 is shining. bruh. honeybruh. "the sun is shining" does not cover it. its hot
 outside. its motherfucking hot as fuck outside. our outdoor plants have been
 crying into their hands all week. whole cars are melting into the sewer. our
 fucking patio umbrella developed sentience to ask me for lemonade this
 morning
 awed-frog
 @robotmango, you need to work for the weather forecast - this was both
 hilarious and so vivid it made me stand up and get some iced tea.
 robotmango
 this is a great idea, thank you. here goes. my audition tape for the weather
 channel. dearly beloved. we are gathered here today to have a fucking funeral
 for the outdoors. it had a good run, with all its creeks and clouds and shit.
 pretty great. now it's ten-thirty at night but still ninety-two asshole-sweating
 degrees and humid as fuck. everything is hot and slimy, like being a "borrower
 that got trapped inside a bottle of shampoo and then accidentally microwaved.
 you can see on my doppler radar that nothing is moving around out there
 because everything is probably dead. the only alive thing is the mosquito
 currently trying to drill a hole in my leg. no surprise that all the shitbag
 mosquitos are fine, since the thermostat of hell is always at the devil's
 preferred temperature. this forecast has gotten away from me a little, but in
 conclusion fuck the sun
 Source: robotmango
 124,122 notes
 A
fuck the sun

fuck the sun

The Weather Channel: The Weather Channel memehumor: The internet is horrified by this squirting, digging clam video but no one can look away.
The Weather Channel: The
 Weather
 Channel
memehumor:

The internet is horrified by this squirting, digging clam video but no one can look away.

memehumor: The internet is horrified by this squirting, digging clam video but no one can look away.