Rightly
Rightly

Rightly

Distance
Distance

Distance

Pained
Pained

Pained

Mom Please
Mom Please

Mom Please

emotions
emotions

emotions

out
out

out

wookiee life day
 wookiee life day

wookiee life day

lighted
 lighted

lighted

dont
 dont

dont

know
 know

know

🔥 | Latest

Kylor3N: Operator: 911What's your emergencyp Responder: My wifes goinginto labor, I don't know what to do. Operator: Is this herfirstborn? Responder: Noths is her husband. We'll be walking around a supermarket or wherever, and he will stop, staring at the watermelon with a look of respect, put his hand on my shoulder and say: "what-a-melon!" 10:43 ICE YOUR BREATHS EXPAND FRIEND Text 4:19 PM 64% K Messages (6) Daddy Contact We just ate Ok so you can be here at How does the turkey I guess through its beak Send Q W E R T Y U I O P A S D F G H J K L Share on Facebook Like zofia-and-sloths listenley tayngerous: A woman is at her father's deathbed. She hasn't seen him in years and now they only have a few moments left. "Dad, I'm sorry," she whispers. "Goodbye, Sorry," he says, "I'm dead 20.3k Guess what Forrest Gump's password is? Son Ugh stop, Dad Okay I'll tell ya. It's 1 forrest Dad lobes Wall of Shame howtobeladad.com SAD consultingtimetravelingdetective Source: dingle-dangle deathbycas: dingle-dangle: A proud new dad sits down to have adrink with his father "Well son, now that you've got a kid of your own, l think it's time to give you this Dad, you don't mean "Yes son, l do" Dad pulls out copy of 1001 Dad Jokes, 5th Edition" Dad I'm honoured...", he says, tears sparkling in his eyes. Hi honoured", replies his father. "I'm dad". 34,229 notes Dad Edit Messages Don't come home me and your mom are getting it on tonight HAHAHA gotta hate autocorrect, right? What do you mean You made a typo right look at your last text No l did not make a typo Guess what time the man went to the dentist? Tooth hurt -y. Dad lobes Wall of Shame howtobeladad.com SAD SON, UR 2 NOW OLD ENUFF FOR THE TALK IM DROWNIN IN IT WRITTEN BY GO TORMNY PICKEALS SEE, SEX IS A LOT LIKE A OCEAN LOL NOW PUT UR HAND uP THIS IS CALLED A HIGH FIVE DRAWN BY VECTORBELLY Dad hurt his wrist and had to go to the hospital where he talked to a doctor. Dad: When this heals will I be able to play the piano? Doctor: Yes, You'll be fine in a few days. Dad: Perfect, I've always wanted to be able to play an instrument. 2:17 PM 82% OO AT&T LTE Contact Messages Today 12:50 PM Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie Today 2:10 PM Ur sick I thought it was a Gouda joke to rethink I am telling the Yes Don't make me out to be some kind of muenster! Delivered On a walk today with my family. We get onto the game what would you do? ask what would you do If fell down a cliff. My sister says call him an ambulance. My dad's reply, "how would that help, he's down a cliff dieing, and I'm shouting, LUCAS YOUR AN AMBULANCE" My dad ladies and gentlemen Shhh Don't skin me like that WHY ALL THESE POTATO PUNS? You could say It's because Potato puns are.. Apeeling. Dad: What do you want for your birthday? Son want a remote control car dad Dad: Say no more son AT&T LTE 8:54 PM News Feed Status o Photo Check In LE News Feed Chris R minutes ago Mie: How much snow is there? Dad: Well it's not really snow, it's more like Snew. Me: Snew? Whats snew? Dad: Not much what's snew with you? can't believe that just happened. 5 Likes Like comment Share So I'm Watching the Incredibles with the family and this happened Syndrome "And when everyone is super, no one will be." My Dad "Who is no one and why does he get to be super." My Dad Bursts out laughing Everone else REALLY! Dad X Messages Edit Hey dad do u belive in ghosts?? No son, there is no such things as ghosts. But our maid said that ghost were real Pack your bags Meet me in he car now Y WE DONT HAVE A MAID NED.com Send smart How did Anakin know what gift Obi-Wan was going to give him? He felt his presents. Dad fokes Wall of Shame hortobeadad.com SAO jungwildeandfree: thisismedisa ear in l stubbed my toe and naturally l screamed "mOTHERFUCKER'' and then my dad poked his head out of the livingroom and said "you rang?" hats off for the ultimate dad joke 87 792 notes What did the beach say to the other beach? Oh my god what now? Nothing they just waved Oh. Did you see what i did there? No. Im shore you did. How do you have friends? Don't be such a beach. My kid said to me "Dad,What's ET Short for OTO Whichi replied. because he's got little legs. WHAT DID THE HAT SAY TO THE HAT RACK? YOU STAY HERE ITM GOING TO GO ON AHEAD DRACULA DOESNT HAVE MANY FRIENDS BECAUSE HES A PAIN IN THE NECK MISS THE OLD TELEPHONES THEY WERE KINKY TURNING POINT By ANDYMAN1943 What's that wheel on your belt? WWW.TOONDOO.COM Arrr, it's driving me nuts! WOULD YOU LIKE SOMECHEESE WITH THAT WHINEP "Son, did you hear about that actress who was killed recently...Reese Withers...Wither-something." Son: Witherspoon?" Dad: "No, with a knife. Dad Joke Han Solo adadiokohansolo 13h What is a bounty hunter's favorite cheese? Boba Feta I'm sorry @KyloR3n was that joke to #cheesy for you!? Haha! I WOULD TELL A JOKE ABOUT PIZZA, BUT IT'S A LITTLE CHEESV. CHEERS TO LEGENDARV Heineken THEVD BE BRD IF THEW LUERENT DAD'S CHEERS TO LEGENDARV #DAD JOKES THEV D BE BAD IF THEW WEREn T DAD'S Heineken open your world DAD, Text Did you notice the big leek in the bathroom when you left? 1:03p No 2:11p type a text message 2:51 2:06p DAD JOKES top Aop What are you doing? I'm measuring your patience illustrations eswatercolour ~joke u/Oreosmooshy My dad came back from a business trip in America: ME: So, what's it like in San Francisco? DAD: A lot like Ireland, though everyone wears short-sleeved tops. ME: Why, is it really hot there? DAD: No, Americans wear short sleeves for constitutional reasons. ME: What DAD: Because the second amendment states that all Americans have the right to BARE ARMS!!! laughs uncontrollably tickld IIMTERRIFIEDOFELENATORS 'LL BETAKING STEPS TO AVOID THEM Dad Jokes t by shitty Watercolour You know son, I couldnt find a single shoe shop in town today... They all seemed to sell them in Pairs! Joke by uirandomsnark HAVE YOU MET MY KIOP HE HAS MY EYES! I NEED THEM BACK Why is water the most hipster element? Earth, Because i and Fir fore they In were famou 2:23 PM Verizon 3G Dad Edit Messages Dad, my computer can't find the WiFi printer anymore I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password Why Bob Marley? Because its always Jammin God damn it. Send WHYDIDNTTHE SHRIMP SHAREHISTREASURELUKE DARTHPLEASE THIS ISAVERY SERIOUS- BECAUSE HEWASALITTLESHELLFISH CHECK IT OUT, I'M THE FIRST PERSON EVER TO CLONE MYSELF! THAT'S AMAZING I BET I'M BESIDE MYSELF! YOU'RE PRETTY EXCITED! YOU DID THIS JUST TO MAKE THAT JOKE DIDN'T YOU BEST TWELVE BILLION DOLLARS I EVER SPENT Cyanide and Happiness O Explosm.net a 90% D 10:41 AM Verizon jenna m1213 PHOTO DeC 26, 20172 Dad there's a moth on the outside of the bathroom door can you get rid of it? Pls hurry because I'm going to cry Dad Dad Dec 26, 2012 2:30 PM Dad is dead. You're next. Love, Moth 19 likes jenna ma 1213 This was my sisters text message to my dad and my dad is frekin weird This is my dad His name is Cliff. DANGEROUS CLIFF STAY BACK Dad Hey kids, a train just passed by" Me and my siblings: How do you know?" Dad: It left its tracks It was funny the first time when I was 9. Now it's funny because it's dad humor "Dad, I'm hungry." "Hello Hungry, I'm dad." Dad, I'm serious." "I thought you were Hungry?" You're kidding me." "No, I'm dad." Me: Dad where are we? Dad: In the car. ITEM DIDN'T SCAN? TELL ME AGAIN HOW YOU THINKIT SHOULD IBF FRE enue memecenter-Com WITHOUT NIPPLES BOOBS WOULD BE POINTLESS ITS HARD TO ENPLAIN PUNS TO KLEPTOMANIACS THEY ALWAYS TAKE THINGS Dad Joke Han Solo Follow Odladjokehansolo What kind of car does a Jedi drive? A Toy-YODA! Ben are you old enough to drive l don't remember 110 207 11:33 PM 13 Jan 2016 HOW'S THE WATER? WET. CHEERS TO LEGENDARV #DAD JOKES THEV'D BE BAD IF THEV WEREn'T DAD'S Holland Imported by HeinekenUSAInc, .a York, NYe2013Heineken Lager Beer Heineken open your world WHAT IS BEETHOVEN'S FAVORITE FRUIT? BA-NA-NA-NA- A SHEEP, A DRUMANDASNAKE FALL DOWN A CLIFF BA-DUMM-TSS I WAS ADDICTED TO THE HOKEY POKEY BUT I TURNED MYSELF AROUND M ign com f HOW DO YOU SPOT THE BLIND GUY ATA NUDIST COLONY ITS NOT HARD CAn Vou GIUE ME A HAND? SURE, BUT I NEED IT BACK WHEN VOU'RE DOME. CHEERS TO LEGENDARV #DADJOKES WANTED TO BUYCAMOUFLAGE PANTS BUTICOULDNTFINDANY A three-legged dog walks into a bar Guess what he said to the bartender? Son Stop, Dad "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw." HOW'S YOUR JOBATTHE CALENDAR FACTORY GOING? IGOTAREDBECAUSEI TOOKACOUPLEOFDAYSoFF. When yo dad come back after 18 years saying "damn that line at Walmart was no joke" dope trvp WITH UELORO. IT'S A TOTAL RIP-OFF. CHEERS TO LEGEnDARV #DADJOKES MYGIRLFRIENDANDIWATCHEDEVERY HARRY POTTERMOVIE BACK TO BACK LUCKILY I WAS THE ONE FACING THE TV TO THE GUY WHO INVENTED TERO ZERO THANKS FOR NOTHING AT&T 3G 9:30 AM Dad Edit Messages Gas is 3.69 out here ...premium is even more Enough With the Saab story Damnit that's goo Send Ive started working as a porn writer but its harder than expected There just so many holes in the plot. WHY DID THE COWBOYGOTO CHURCH HETHOUGHT ITWASASTEAK CENTER Son Dad, are you alright? No. I'm half left. Dad lobes Wall of Shame howtobeladad.com SAD Hey Dad can I work a half-day today Me working for my dads company Half of a day is 12 hours Sure you can but *Troll DadBoss* problem? HOW DOES MOSES MAKE COFFEE? Hebrews it. quickmeme.com What do you call the fear of being trapped in a chimney? CLAUStrophobia. Dad lobes Wall of Shame howtobeadad.com I KNOWITSCHEESY BUT I FEEL GRATE LIHowdoylu Lind Will Smithin the snow- Look Lhe fresh prints Lu LA Son I Have A Joke For u Tell Me I Know You Dont I Dont Get It forev Pussy I Dont Get It FFUU UU U memecenter.com MameCenuera AN ADVIENTURED ALPACA MY BAGS What veggie do star athletes eat to run fast? Accelery ada djks What's the difference between a piano a tuna and glue? Son: What? You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna Son: What about the glue? I knew you'd get stuck there. Dad lobes Wall of Shame howtobeladad.com SAD JOKEDTOSTATICALLYCHARGED 8-YEAR-OLD THAT SHELL NEED TO BE GROUNDED SPENT REST OF EVENING EXPLAININGIWASNT PUNISHING HER Guy Dangerous @Lerky Son: "Mom, Dad.. I'm gay" Mom: *staring at dad Dad: ...*clenches fists Mom: ...don't! Dad: *sweats profusely Mom: Dad: HI GAY, IM DAD MY FIRST TIME USING AN ELEVATOR WAS AN UPLIFTING EXPERIENCE THE SECOND TIME LET ME DOWN Server: Do you want a cup or a bowl? Dad: That's probably a good idea. Otherwise it will just go all over the table. 22 WORDS.COM Dads universally make unfunny jokes and have terrible humor, and I'm just sitting here $100% screaming/crying.
Kylor3N: Operator: 911What's your emergencyp
 Responder: My wifes goinginto labor, I
 don't know what to do.
 Operator: Is this herfirstborn?
 Responder: Noths is her husband.

 We'll be walking around a supermarket or
 wherever, and he will stop, staring at the
 watermelon with a look of respect, put his hand
 on my shoulder and say: "what-a-melon!"

 10:43
 ICE
 YOUR
 BREATHS
 EXPAND
 FRIEND
 Text
 4:19 PM
 64%
 K Messages (6) Daddy
 Contact
 We just ate
 Ok so you can be here at
 How does the turkey
 I guess through its beak
 Send
 Q W E R T Y U
 I O P
 A S D F G H J K L
 Share on Facebook
 Like

 zofia-and-sloths
 listenley
 tayngerous:
 A woman is at her father's deathbed.
 She hasn't seen him in years and
 now they only have a few moments
 left.
 "Dad, I'm sorry," she whispers.
 "Goodbye, Sorry," he says, "I'm
 dead
 20.3k

 Guess what
 Forrest Gump's
 password is?
 Son Ugh stop, Dad
 Okay I'll
 tell ya.
 It's
 1 forrest
 Dad lobes Wall of Shame
 howtobeladad.com
 SAD

 consultingtimetravelingdetective
 Source: dingle-dangle
 deathbycas:
 dingle-dangle:
 A proud new dad sits down to have adrink with his father
 "Well son, now that you've got a kid of your own, l think it's time to
 give you this
 Dad, you don't mean
 "Yes son, l do" Dad pulls out copy of 1001 Dad Jokes, 5th Edition"
 Dad
 I'm honoured...", he says, tears sparkling in his eyes.
 Hi honoured", replies his father.
 "I'm dad".
 34,229 notes

 Dad
 Edit
 Messages
 Don't come home me and your
 mom are getting it on tonight
 HAHAHA gotta hate autocorrect,
 right?
 What do you mean
 You made a typo right look
 at your last text
 No l did not make a typo

 Guess what time
 the man went
 to the dentist?
 Tooth hurt -y.
 Dad lobes Wall of Shame
 howtobeladad.com
 SAD

 SON, UR 2 NOW
 OLD ENUFF FOR THE TALK
 IM DROWNIN IN IT
 WRITTEN BY GO TORMNY PICKEALS
 SEE, SEX IS A LOT
 LIKE A OCEAN
 LOL NOW PUT UR HAND uP
 THIS IS CALLED A HIGH FIVE
 DRAWN BY VECTORBELLY

 Dad hurt his wrist and had to go to the hospital where he talked to a doctor.
 Dad: When this heals will I be able to play the piano?
 Doctor: Yes, You'll be fine in a few days.
 Dad: Perfect, I've always wanted to be able to play an instrument.

 2:17 PM
 82%
 OO
 AT&T LTE
 Contact
 Messages
 Today 12:50 PM
 Did you hear about the
 cheese factory that
 exploded in France?
 There was nothing left but
 de Brie
 Today 2:10 PM
 Ur sick
 I thought it was a Gouda
 joke
 to rethink
 I am telling
 the Yes
 Don't make me out to be
 some kind of muenster!
 Delivered

 On a walk today with my family. We
 get onto the game what would you
 do? ask what would you do If fell
 down a cliff. My sister says call him
 an ambulance.
 My dad's reply, "how would that
 help, he's down a cliff dieing, and
 I'm shouting, LUCAS YOUR AN
 AMBULANCE"
 My dad ladies and gentlemen

 Shhh
 Don't skin me like that
 WHY ALL THESE POTATO
 PUNS?
 You could say
 It's because
 Potato puns are..
 Apeeling.

 Dad: What do you want for your birthday?
 Son
 want a remote control car dad
 Dad: Say no more son

 AT&T LTE
 8:54 PM
 News Feed
 Status
 o
 Photo
 Check In
 LE News Feed
 Chris R
 minutes ago
 Mie: How much snow is there?
 Dad: Well it's not really snow, it's more like
 Snew.
 Me: Snew? Whats snew?
 Dad: Not much what's snew with you?
 can't believe that just happened.
 5 Likes
 Like
 comment
 Share

 So I'm Watching the Incredibles with the family and this happened
 Syndrome "And when everyone is super, no one will be."
 My Dad "Who is no one and why does he get to be super."
 My Dad Bursts out laughing
 Everone else
 REALLY!

 Dad X
 Messages
 Edit
 Hey dad do u belive in ghosts??
 No son, there is no such things
 as ghosts.
 But our maid said that ghost
 were real
 Pack your bags
 Meet me in
 he car now
 Y
 WE DONT HAVE A MAID
 NED.com Send
 smart
 How did Anakin know what
 gift Obi-Wan was going
 to give him?
 He felt his
 presents.
 Dad fokes Wall of Shame
 hortobeadad.com SAO

 jungwildeandfree:
 thisismedisa
 ear in
 l stubbed my toe and naturally l
 screamed "mOTHERFUCKER'' and
 then my dad poked his head out of
 the livingroom and said "you
 rang?"
 hats off for the ultimate dad joke
 87 792 notes

 What did the beach say to
 the other beach?
 Oh my god what now?
 Nothing they just waved
 Oh.
 Did you see what i did
 there?
 No.
 Im shore you did.
 How do you have friends?
 Don't be such a beach.

 My kid said to me "Dad,What's ET
 Short for OTO Whichi replied.
 because he's got little legs.

 WHAT DID THE HAT SAY TO THE HAT RACK?
 YOU STAY HERE ITM GOING TO GO ON AHEAD

 DRACULA DOESNT HAVE MANY FRIENDS
 BECAUSE HES A
 PAIN IN THE NECK

 MISS THE OLD
 TELEPHONES
 THEY WERE KINKY

 TURNING POINT
 By ANDYMAN1943
 What's that wheel on your belt?
 WWW.TOONDOO.COM
 Arrr, it's driving me nuts!

 WOULD YOU LIKE SOMECHEESE
 WITH THAT WHINEP

 "Son, did you hear about that actress
 who was killed recently...Reese
 Withers...Wither-something."
 Son: Witherspoon?"
 Dad: "No, with a knife.

 Dad Joke Han Solo
 adadiokohansolo 13h
 What is a bounty hunter's favorite cheese?
 Boba Feta
 I'm sorry @KyloR3n was that joke to
 #cheesy for you!? Haha!

 I WOULD TELL A JOKE ABOUT
 PIZZA, BUT IT'S A LITTLE
 CHEESV.
 CHEERS TO LEGENDARV
 Heineken
 THEVD BE BRD IF THEW LUERENT DAD'S
 CHEERS TO LEGENDARV
 #DAD JOKES
 THEV D BE BAD IF THEW WEREn T DAD'S
 Heineken
 open your world

 DAD, Text
 Did you notice the big leek in
 the bathroom when you left?
 1:03p
 No
 2:11p
 type a text message
 2:51
 2:06p

 DAD JOKES
 top
 Aop
 What are you doing?
 I'm measuring
 your patience
 illustrations eswatercolour ~joke u/Oreosmooshy

 My dad came back from a business trip in
 America:
 ME: So, what's it like in San Francisco?
 DAD: A lot like Ireland, though everyone wears
 short-sleeved tops.
 ME: Why, is it really hot there?
 DAD: No, Americans wear short sleeves for
 constitutional reasons.
 ME: What
 DAD: Because the second amendment states
 that all Americans have the right to BARE
 ARMS!!! laughs uncontrollably
 tickld

 IIMTERRIFIEDOFELENATORS
 'LL BETAKING STEPS
 TO AVOID THEM

 Dad Jokes t
 by shitty Watercolour
 You know son, I couldnt
 find a single shoe shop
 in town today...
 They all seemed to
 sell them in Pairs!
 Joke by uirandomsnark

 HAVE YOU
 MET MY KIOP
 HE HAS
 MY EYES!
 I NEED
 THEM BACK

 Why is water the most
 hipster element?
 Earth,
 Because i
 and Fir
 fore they
 In
 were famou

 2:23 PM
 Verizon 3G
 Dad
 Edit
 Messages
 Dad, my computer can't
 find the WiFi printer
 anymore
 I renamed it to Bob
 Marley, same password
 Why Bob Marley?
 Because its always
 Jammin
 God damn it.
 Send

 WHYDIDNTTHE SHRIMP
 SHAREHISTREASURELUKE
 DARTHPLEASE THIS ISAVERY SERIOUS-
 BECAUSE HEWASALITTLESHELLFISH

 CHECK IT OUT, I'M THE FIRST
 PERSON EVER TO CLONE MYSELF!
 THAT'S AMAZING
 I BET
 I'M BESIDE MYSELF!
 YOU'RE PRETTY EXCITED!
 YOU DID THIS JUST TO MAKE
 THAT JOKE DIDN'T YOU
 BEST TWELVE BILLION
 DOLLARS I EVER SPENT
 Cyanide and Happiness O Explosm.net

 a 90% D
 10:41 AM
 Verizon
 jenna m1213
 PHOTO
 DeC 26, 20172
 Dad there's a moth on the
 outside of the bathroom
 door can you get rid of it?
 Pls hurry because I'm
 going to cry
 Dad
 Dad
 Dec 26, 2012 2:30 PM
 Dad is dead. You're next.
 Love, Moth
 19 likes
 jenna ma 1213 This was my sisters text
 message to my dad and my dad is frekin
 weird

 This is my dad
 His name is Cliff.
 DANGEROUS CLIFF
 STAY BACK

 Dad
 Hey kids, a train just passed by" Me and my siblings: How do you
 know?" Dad: It left its tracks
 It was funny the first time when I was 9. Now it's funny because it's dad
 humor

 "Dad, I'm hungry."
 "Hello Hungry, I'm dad."
 Dad, I'm serious."
 "I thought you were Hungry?"
 You're kidding me."
 "No, I'm dad."

 Me: Dad where are we?
 Dad: In the car.

 ITEM DIDN'T SCAN?
 TELL ME AGAIN HOW YOU
 THINKIT SHOULD IBF FRE
 enue
 memecenter-Com

 WITHOUT NIPPLES
 BOOBS WOULD BE POINTLESS

 ITS HARD TO ENPLAIN PUNS TO
 KLEPTOMANIACS
 THEY ALWAYS TAKE THINGS

 Dad Joke Han Solo
 Follow
 Odladjokehansolo
 What kind of car does a Jedi drive?
 A Toy-YODA!
 Ben are you old enough to drive l don't
 remember
 110
 207
 11:33 PM 13 Jan 2016

 HOW'S THE WATER?
 WET.
 CHEERS TO LEGENDARV
 #DAD JOKES
 THEV'D BE BAD IF THEV WEREn'T DAD'S
 Holland Imported by HeinekenUSAInc, .a
 York, NYe2013Heineken Lager Beer
 Heineken
 open your world

 WHAT IS BEETHOVEN'S
 FAVORITE FRUIT?
 BA-NA-NA-NA-

 A SHEEP, A DRUMANDASNAKE
 FALL DOWN A CLIFF
 BA-DUMM-TSS

 I WAS ADDICTED TO
 THE HOKEY POKEY
 BUT I TURNED
 MYSELF AROUND
 M ign com f

 HOW DO YOU SPOT THE BLIND
 GUY ATA NUDIST COLONY
 ITS NOT HARD

 CAn Vou GIUE ME A HAND?
 SURE, BUT I NEED IT BACK
 WHEN VOU'RE DOME.
 CHEERS TO LEGENDARV
 #DADJOKES

 WANTED TO BUYCAMOUFLAGE PANTS
 BUTICOULDNTFINDANY

 A three-legged dog walks
 into a bar
 Guess what he
 said to the bartender?
 Son Stop, Dad
 "I'm lookin'
 for the man
 who shot
 my paw."

 HOW'S YOUR JOBATTHE
 CALENDAR FACTORY GOING?
 IGOTAREDBECAUSEI
 TOOKACOUPLEOFDAYSoFF.

 When yo dad come back after 18 years
 saying "damn that line at Walmart was
 no joke"
 dope trvp

 WITH UELORO. IT'S A TOTAL
 RIP-OFF.
 CHEERS TO LEGEnDARV
 #DADJOKES

 MYGIRLFRIENDANDIWATCHEDEVERY
 HARRY POTTERMOVIE BACK TO BACK
 LUCKILY I WAS THE ONE
 FACING THE TV

 TO THE GUY WHO INVENTED TERO
 ZERO
 THANKS FOR NOTHING

 AT&T 3G
 9:30 AM
 Dad
 Edit
 Messages
 Gas is 3.69 out
 here ...premium is even
 more
 Enough With the Saab
 story
 Damnit that's goo
 Send

 Ive started working as a
 porn
 writer but its harder than expected
 There just so many holes in the
 plot.

 WHY DID THE COWBOYGOTO
 CHURCH
 HETHOUGHT ITWASASTEAK
 CENTER

 Son
 Dad, are
 you alright?
 No. I'm
 half left.
 Dad lobes Wall of Shame
 howtobeladad.com
 SAD

 Hey Dad can
 I work a
 half-day
 today
 Me working for my dads company
 Half of a day
 is 12 hours
 Sure you can
 but
 *Troll DadBoss*
 problem?

 HOW DOES MOSES MAKE COFFEE?
 Hebrews it.
 quickmeme.com

 What do you
 call the fear
 of being
 trapped in
 a chimney?
 CLAUStrophobia.
 Dad lobes Wall of Shame
 howtobeadad.com

 I KNOWITSCHEESY
 BUT I FEEL GRATE

 LIHowdoylu Lind Will Smithin the snow-
 Look Lhe fresh prints
 Lu LA
 Son I Have A Joke For u
 Tell Me
 I Know You Dont
 I Dont Get It
 forev
 Pussy
 I Dont Get It
 FFUU
 UU U
 memecenter.com
 MameCenuera

 AN ADVIENTURED
 ALPACA MY BAGS

 What veggie do star athletes eat to run fast?
 Accelery
 ada djks

 What's the difference
 between a piano
 a tuna and glue?
 Son: What?
 You can tuna piano,
 but you can't
 piano a tuna
 Son: What about the glue?
 I knew you'd get stuck there.
 Dad lobes Wall of Shame
 howtobeladad.com
 SAD

 JOKEDTOSTATICALLYCHARGED
 8-YEAR-OLD THAT SHELL NEED TO
 BE GROUNDED
 SPENT REST OF EVENING
 EXPLAININGIWASNT
 PUNISHING HER

 Guy Dangerous
 @Lerky
 Son: "Mom, Dad.. I'm gay"
 Mom: *staring at dad
 Dad: ...*clenches fists
 Mom: ...don't!
 Dad: *sweats profusely
 Mom:
 Dad: HI GAY, IM DAD

 MY FIRST TIME USING AN ELEVATOR
 WAS AN UPLIFTING EXPERIENCE
 THE SECOND TIME LET ME DOWN

 Server: Do you want
 a cup or a bowl?
 Dad: That's
 probably a good idea.
 Otherwise it will just
 go all over the table.
 22 WORDS.COM
Dads universally make unfunny jokes and have terrible humor, and I'm just sitting here $100% screaming/crying.

Dads universally make unfunny jokes and have terrible humor, and I'm just sitting here $100% screaming/crying.