Colour
Colour

Colour

Knocked
Knocked

Knocked

A Little
A Little

A Little

Knocking
Knocking

Knocking

Kl Rahul
Kl Rahul

Kl Rahul

corpses
 corpses

corpses

firstly
firstly

firstly

gritty
gritty

gritty

there
there

there

yall
yall

yall

🔥 | Latest

Bitch, Children, and Fall: arianod: rainbowbarnacle: alexander-lamington: gallusrostromegalus: jhaernyl: botanyshitposts: spirit-of-science: thebloggerbloggerfun: teafortrouble: eteo: fall-for-nothing: trickster-eridan: buttpilgrim: scientificperfection: kittiesinthemorning: I just don’t understand how this happened. But here’s a picture of a lemon from my backyard WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK when life gives yoǘ̻̬͓͎̣̟̩̦͢ ͪ̂̀̆҉̳̘̝̺̀l͇̬̹̞̻̥͕̥̗̒̎ͩ̋ͥ͆e͙̭̭̠̣̠̊́ͩ̂̓̀ṃ̛̍̂͛̈̏o̠̪̪ͤ͗͘n̵͉̣ͭͧ̿ͧ͛̀s̷̠͑ͬͫͦ̅͡ ̸͐ͤ͘҉̦̺M̰̹͙͇ͮ̉ͫͅȦ̻̔̅̇̑ͭ͛͋͘K̠̻̫̤̇̀ͥE͂ͪ͏̱̤͚͕ ̞͔̜̬̑ͯ͑͢ͅŞ͔̦̩̳̣̖ͮ͊ͨA͈̓͂̈́̀̀̚͘C̡̠̟͉ͪ͆̔ͤ͂ͪR̬͙͕ͪ̀͠Ĩ̵̖͚̑̊̓́F͎͕̄Iͬͧ̀̂̑ͪ͟͏̴̪̤ͅC̢̰̝͓̗͛ͬ̔̍̓́́̚̚Ḙ̶̠̰̳̩̳̊ͭͮ̇̇̚̕S̻͖̣̰̒̈͟ it’s back Satan lemon every villain is lemons And finally, dear listeners, a reminder; several concerned citizens have brought to the city’s attention an irregularity surrounding this summer’s citrus harvest. City council would like to remind all enterprising fruit pickers to exercise reasonable caution when acquiring these fruits. Grasp the fruit firmly around its circumference, pull slowly but steadily to avoid damaging the tree, and under no circumstances heed its demands of you. Do not acknowledge or obey the depraved whisperings of the demon fruit. And now: The Weather. This kind of looks like a Buddha’s hand to me they’re a type of Citron, a citrus closely related to lemons. I wonder if whatever causes that twistedness in Buddha’s hands is present but dormant/recessive in other citruses? @botanyshitposts do you know about this? a lot of people having been messaging me about this, and honestly i had no idea that Buddha’s hands existed and it totally seems likely to me??? like honestly that seems like a really plausible explanation, especially because when we look at the demon fruit, the twisty ‘arms’ are going off in all different directions when the only place i can see a twisty arm happening on a lemon is on the top. like if the fruit is developing from the original growth point into a body then why are the offshoots developing the opposite way, from a body into a twisty thing? when in a Buddha’s hand, it totally makes sense because the twisty things are growing outward anyway.  im no pomologist but the similarities in the growth patterns really do reflect in The Demon Fruit.  @gallusrostromegalus WAIT I KNOW THIS ONE! The short version is that Citrus is a slutty, slutty genus of plants that can knock up pretty much any other member of the genus and uh… it’s mots recent relative as of 7 million years ago, becuase why not. Usually that makes for tasty children like tangerines and whatnot, but sometimes Weird Shit happens. All modern citrus are descended from Mandrin oranges, Pumelos and Etrogs, the latter being closest to lemons and which looks like this: It’s big and lumpy and mostly pith but also tasty as hell so Ye Ancient Malay Archipeligo Orchard Guy gets to breeding these for more tasty innards, presumable inventing lemonade in the process.  YAMAOG also finds out that it’s REALLY easy to seriously mess with the overall appearence of the fruit of these very inbred etrogs, and starts breeding all kinds of nonsense, like Bhudda’s palms, Modern Lemons and Grapefruit. YAMAOG also noticed that in addition to the occasional ugly inbred mule child, you can also get really strange looking fruit if the tree gets sick, is malnourished, if any part of the flower is damaged, or if the weather just sucks that year.  In addition to being a Major Slut, Citrus is also a Fussy Bitch. Looking at the Demon Fruit, my best guesses are If you’ve had weird-shaped fruits off that tree before, you might have a very strange hybrid tree like the dachsund-pitbull one of my neighbors owns. If it’s only the one fruit, and your tree is producing otherwise normal lemons, that particular flower or branch took some kind of damage or had a viral infection, which fucked up all the hormones and hence your lemon has gone all Ending-Of-Akira on you. GOOD NEWS FOR BOTH SCENARIOS: unless the fruit looks like it’s actually rotting, it’s safe to eat!  weird fruit shapes in lemons pretty much never makes them dangerous, just maybe a bit more tart than usual. Enjoy a nice glass of demonfruit juice! @motorizedduck relevant
Bitch, Children, and Fall: arianod:

rainbowbarnacle:

alexander-lamington:

gallusrostromegalus:

jhaernyl:

botanyshitposts:


spirit-of-science:

thebloggerbloggerfun:

teafortrouble:

eteo:

fall-for-nothing:

trickster-eridan:

buttpilgrim:

scientificperfection:

kittiesinthemorning:

I just don’t understand how this happened. But here’s a picture of a lemon from my backyard

WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK

when life gives yoǘ̻̬͓͎̣̟̩̦͢ ͪ̂̀̆҉̳̘̝̺̀l͇̬̹̞̻̥͕̥̗̒̎ͩ̋ͥ͆e͙̭̭̠̣̠̊́ͩ̂̓̀ṃ̛̍̂͛̈̏o̠̪̪ͤ͗͘n̵͉̣ͭͧ̿ͧ͛̀s̷̠͑ͬͫͦ̅͡ ̸͐ͤ͘҉̦̺M̰̹͙͇ͮ̉ͫͅȦ̻̔̅̇̑ͭ͛͋͘K̠̻̫̤̇̀ͥE͂ͪ͏̱̤͚͕ ̞͔̜̬̑ͯ͑͢ͅŞ͔̦̩̳̣̖ͮ͊ͨA͈̓͂̈́̀̀̚͘C̡̠̟͉ͪ͆̔ͤ͂ͪR̬͙͕ͪ̀͠Ĩ̵̖͚̑̊̓́F͎͕̄Iͬͧ̀̂̑ͪ͟͏̴̪̤ͅC̢̰̝͓̗͛ͬ̔̍̓́́̚̚Ḙ̶̠̰̳̩̳̊ͭͮ̇̇̚̕S̻͖̣̰̒̈͟

it’s back

Satan lemon

every villain is lemons

And finally, dear listeners, a reminder; several concerned citizens have brought to the city’s attention an irregularity surrounding this summer’s citrus harvest. City council would like to remind all enterprising fruit pickers to exercise reasonable caution when acquiring these fruits. Grasp the fruit firmly around its circumference, pull slowly but steadily to avoid damaging the tree, and under no circumstances heed its demands of you. Do not acknowledge or obey the depraved whisperings of the demon fruit.

And now: The Weather.

This kind of looks like a Buddha’s hand to me
they’re a type of Citron, a citrus closely related to lemons. I wonder if whatever causes that twistedness in Buddha’s hands is present but dormant/recessive in other citruses?

@botanyshitposts do you know about this?

a lot of people having been messaging me about this, and honestly i had no idea that Buddha’s hands existed and it totally seems likely to me??? like honestly that seems like a really plausible explanation, especially because when we look at the demon fruit, the twisty ‘arms’ are going off in all different directions when the only place i can see a twisty arm happening on a lemon is on the top. like if the fruit is developing from the original growth point into a body then why are the offshoots developing the opposite way, from a body into a twisty thing? when in a Buddha’s hand, it totally makes sense because the twisty things are growing outward anyway. 
im no pomologist but the similarities in the growth patterns really do reflect in The Demon Fruit. 


@gallusrostromegalus 

WAIT I KNOW THIS ONE!
The short version is that Citrus is a slutty, slutty genus of plants that can knock up pretty much any other member of the genus and uh… it’s mots recent relative as of 7 million years ago, becuase why not. Usually that makes for tasty children like tangerines and whatnot, but sometimes Weird Shit happens.
All modern citrus are descended from Mandrin oranges, Pumelos and Etrogs, the latter being closest to lemons and which looks like this:
It’s big and lumpy and mostly pith but also tasty as hell so Ye Ancient Malay Archipeligo Orchard Guy gets to breeding these for more tasty innards, presumable inventing lemonade in the process.  YAMAOG also finds out that it’s REALLY easy to seriously mess with the overall appearence of the fruit of these very inbred etrogs, and starts breeding all kinds of nonsense, like Bhudda’s palms, Modern Lemons and Grapefruit.
YAMAOG also noticed that in addition to the occasional ugly inbred mule child, you can also get really strange looking fruit if the tree gets sick, is malnourished, if any part of the flower is damaged, or if the weather just sucks that year.  In addition to being a Major Slut, Citrus is also a Fussy Bitch.
Looking at the Demon Fruit, my best guesses are
If you’ve had weird-shaped fruits off that tree before, you might have a very strange hybrid tree like the dachsund-pitbull one of my neighbors owns.
If it’s only the one fruit, and your tree is producing otherwise normal lemons, that particular flower or branch took some kind of damage or had a viral infection, which fucked up all the hormones and hence your lemon has gone all Ending-Of-Akira on you.
GOOD NEWS FOR BOTH SCENARIOS: unless the fruit looks like it’s actually rotting, it’s safe to eat!  weird fruit shapes in lemons pretty much never makes them dangerous, just maybe a bit more tart than usual.
Enjoy a nice glass of demonfruit juice!



@motorizedduck

relevant

arianod: rainbowbarnacle: alexander-lamington: gallusrostromegalus: jhaernyl: botanyshitposts: spirit-of-science: thebloggerbloggerf...

Be Like, Life, and Mood: Anonymous 08/03/19(Sat)00:42:45 No.53711001 Simple. I want to kidnap a woman and transform her. I want to find some random frumpy woman and knock her out, take her to a secluded area and lock her 169 KB JPG underground. I don't want to hurt her or make her suffer; her room will be nice, she'll get three square meals a day, for all intents and purposes it'll be like a vacation. But every few weeks I'll knock her out with gas and she'll wake up with some new operation done. Whether it be implants, lipo, or anything plastic surgery related I'll do this over the course of 6 months to a year, having her write in a diary about her new body and how she's learning to live with it. By the end she'll look nothing like what she used to, depending on my mood she might have gigantic beshine tits, or maybe a wasp waist. Either way I'll throw her back into the wild to live the rest of her life in a body that isn't hers and start over with a new girl. black-in-kansas: edgarallenbroe: the-mighty-birdy: supreme-leader-stoat: the-mighty-birdy: officialfist: WELL IF THIS AIN’T THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I’VE READ IN A WHILE You’d think with the fact CyberSmith is literally under criminal investigation for child image content violation he’d think it not wise to act so debauched on Tumblr. He doesn’t strike me as the wise type. Me: Let’s see what’s going on with Tumblr todayFirst thing I see: *This shit*Me:
Be Like, Life, and Mood: Anonymous
 08/03/19(Sat)00:42:45 No.53711001
 Simple. I want to kidnap a woman
 and transform her. I want to find
 some random frumpy woman and
 knock her out, take her to a
 secluded area and lock her
 169 KB JPG
 underground. I don't want to hurt her
 or make her suffer; her room will be nice, she'll get
 three square meals a day, for all intents and
 purposes it'll be like a vacation. But every few
 weeks I'll knock her out with gas and she'll wake up
 with some new operation done. Whether it be
 implants, lipo, or anything plastic surgery related
 I'll do this over the course of 6 months to a year,
 having her write in a diary about her new body and
 how she's learning to live with it. By the end she'll
 look nothing like what she used to, depending on
 my mood she might have gigantic beshine tits, or
 maybe a wasp waist. Either way I'll throw her back
 into the wild to live the rest of her life in a body that
 isn't hers and start over with a new girl.
black-in-kansas:

edgarallenbroe:

the-mighty-birdy:
supreme-leader-stoat:


the-mighty-birdy:

officialfist:



WELL IF THIS AIN’T THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I’VE READ IN A WHILE




You’d think with the fact CyberSmith is literally under criminal investigation for child image content violation he’d think it not wise to act so debauched on Tumblr.

He doesn’t strike me as the wise type.

Me: Let’s see what’s going on with Tumblr todayFirst thing I see: *This shit*Me:

black-in-kansas: edgarallenbroe: the-mighty-birdy: supreme-leader-stoat: the-mighty-birdy: officialfist: WELL IF THIS AIN’T THE MOST...

Ass, Beliebers, and Charlie: Kari Bowling Tumblr Boring The internet must hate us XD Like Comment Unfollow Post Share 2 hours ago 2 people like this Kennedy Brook Williams Imao i had mine for like 15 minutes and i just deleted it,! about an hour ago . Like、A1 Amber Renee Burchett shut the hell up. tumblr is life 2 minutes ago Like Kari Bowling no, I made one and 5 minutes later i deleted it xDD about a minute ago Like Amber Renee Burchett do not speak of tumblr in any of this sort about a minute ago Like Kari Bowling Im sorry? a few seconds ago Like Amber Renee Burchett ill post this on there and they'll find a few seconds ago Like Write a comment evilcatv: m8snn: blue10273: 24nowait25: spirit-money: lexxiechan: samfuckingb3ttl3y: music-geek1222: pocket-full-of-cher: certainlynotwitty: loveot0my: fuckyeahfalling-in-reverse: fifty-shades-of-cumberbatch: 69ocock: garnetgivealittlelove: burningbridges97: your-heart-has-spoken-so-let-go: until-the-earth-is-free: dumbledoctor: geekerypokery: enjoi-life-now: thatfunnyblog: We found you potterheads, grab your wands whovians, hop in your TARDISes supernatural fans, get the shotguns sherlockians, hire your consulting criminals tributes, knock an arrow avengers fans, assemble lotr fans, unsheath Sting we’ve got a few people to track down Les Mis fans, build a barricade? Yes? Gleeks, grab your slushies Rizzles fans, grab your guns and scalpels Wizards and Witches, time to kick muggle ass. NCIS fans, grab your gear. Castle fans, alakazam that jackass The Last Airbender fans master your bending Assassin’s Creed fans, ready your hidden blades. Falling In Reverse fans, get Charlie. BVB Army, get on your warpaint. Slash gash Terror Crew, grab your chainsaws. VE! Coven, show your fangs. Directioners, get the fucking glitter beliebers,get the supras. Of Mice and Men fans, get squidgy. Motionless In White fans, get Officer Peppercorn and some PCP. Pierce The Veil fans, get the Sheepcat. Sleeping With Sirens fans, get Sam Link.. Naruto fans, grab your kunai Bleach fans, ready your zampakuto Homestucks get your Strife Specibus no fucking way its the actual post I’m shaking this post was never meant to be seen outside of screenshots and jokes this is one of the worst posts on tumblr every single one of them is deactivated, it’s a fucking graveyard, a memorial park My eyes cannot comprehend what i saw here
Ass, Beliebers, and Charlie: Kari Bowling
 Tumblr Boring
 The internet must hate us
 XD
 Like Comment Unfollow Post Share 2 hours ago
 2 people like this
 Kennedy Brook Williams Imao i had mine for like 15 minutes and i
 just deleted it,!
 about an hour ago . Like、A1
 Amber Renee Burchett shut the hell up. tumblr is life
 2 minutes ago Like
 Kari Bowling no, I made one and 5 minutes later i deleted it xDD
 about a minute ago Like
 Amber Renee Burchett do not speak of tumblr in any of this sort
 about a minute ago Like
 Kari Bowling Im sorry?
 a few seconds ago Like
 Amber Renee Burchett ill post this on there and they'll find
 a few seconds ago Like
 Write a comment
evilcatv:


m8snn:

blue10273:

24nowait25:

spirit-money:

lexxiechan:

samfuckingb3ttl3y:

music-geek1222:

pocket-full-of-cher:

certainlynotwitty:

loveot0my:

fuckyeahfalling-in-reverse:

fifty-shades-of-cumberbatch:

69ocock:

garnetgivealittlelove:

burningbridges97:

your-heart-has-spoken-so-let-go:

until-the-earth-is-free:

dumbledoctor:

geekerypokery:

enjoi-life-now:

thatfunnyblog:

We found you



potterheads, grab your wands
whovians, hop in your TARDISes
supernatural fans, get the shotguns
sherlockians, hire your consulting criminals
tributes, knock an arrow
avengers fans, assemble
lotr fans, unsheath Sting
we’ve got a few people to track down



Les Mis fans, build a barricade? Yes?

Gleeks, grab your slushies
Rizzles fans, grab your guns and scalpels
Wizards and Witches, time to kick muggle ass.

NCIS fans, grab your gear.

Castle fans, alakazam that jackass

The Last Airbender fans master your bending

Assassin’s Creed fans, ready your hidden blades.

Falling In Reverse fans, get Charlie.

BVB Army, get on your warpaint.
Slash gash Terror Crew, grab your chainsaws.
VE! Coven, show your fangs.

Directioners, get the fucking glitter

beliebers,get the supras.

Of Mice and Men fans, get squidgy.

Motionless In White fans, get Officer Peppercorn and some PCP.
Pierce The Veil fans, get the Sheepcat.
Sleeping With Sirens fans, get Sam Link..

Naruto fans, grab your kunai
Bleach fans, ready your zampakuto

Homestucks get your Strife Specibus


no fucking way its the actual post


I’m shaking this post was never meant to be seen outside of screenshots and jokes

this is one of the worst posts on tumblr


every single one of them is deactivated, it’s a fucking graveyard, a memorial park


My eyes cannot comprehend what i saw here

evilcatv: m8snn: blue10273: 24nowait25: spirit-money: lexxiechan: samfuckingb3ttl3y: music-geek1222: pocket-full-of-cher: certainl...

Ass, Bored, and Confused: 18 02:56 ....ll Thread James Dator @James.. 17 May In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu Reeves story 615 ti 19.2K 54.3K James Dator @James.. 17 May Keanu came to the movie theater I worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was working on the Matrix series at the time. It's a quiet, Wednesday morning almost nobody is seeing movies. 6 C t524 8,415 James Dator @James.. 17 May I'm working the box office, bored as hell and suddenly this dude walks up in jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize it's Keanu Reeves 7 1450 8,840 James Dator @James 17 Mayv He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell," the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking star struck I do what any sensible 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to give him my employee discount. This means he needs to sign my sheet and therefore I have his autograph 5 8,595 t439 James Dator @James. 17 May "I don't work here," Keanu says. Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm flustered and just charge him the normal price. Kicking myself after for not getting his autograph 9 8,300 t 410 James Dator @James.. 17 May 2 minutes later there's a knock on the door behind me that leads into the box office. I assume it's my manager. It's Keanu. 94 t 409 8,297 17 May "I realized you probably wanted my autograph," he says. "So I signed this." He hands me a receipt from the concessions stand that he signed on the back. He then casually throws an ice James Dator @James... cream cone in the trash can and sees his movie 26 t 639 13.8K James Dator @James Dator realize later that he bought an ice cream cone he didn't want, just to get receipt paper so he could scribble his autograph for a 16-year-old idiot. 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes awesomacious: Sweet Keanu
Ass, Bored, and Confused: 18
 02:56 ....ll
 Thread
 James Dator @James.. 17 May
 In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu
 Reeves story
 615
 ti 19.2K 54.3K
 James Dator @James..
 17 May
 Keanu came to the movie theater I
 worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was
 working on the Matrix series at the time.
 It's a quiet, Wednesday morning
 almost nobody is seeing movies.
 6 C
 t524
 8,415
 James Dator @James..
 17 May
 I'm working the box office, bored as hell
 and suddenly this dude walks up in
 jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding
 helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian
 looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30
 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize
 it's Keanu Reeves
 7
 1450
 8,840
 James Dator @James 17 Mayv
 He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell,"
 the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking
 star struck I do what any sensible
 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to
 give him my employee discount. This
 means he needs to sign my sheet and
 therefore I have his autograph
 5
 8,595
 t439
 James Dator @James. 17 May
 "I don't work here," Keanu says.
 Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm
 flustered and just charge him the normal
 price. Kicking myself after for not getting
 his autograph
 9
 8,300
 t 410
 James Dator @James..
 17 May
 2 minutes later there's a knock on the
 door behind me that leads into the box
 office. I assume it's my manager. It's
 Keanu.
 94
 t 409
 8,297
 17 May
 "I realized you probably wanted my
 autograph," he says. "So I signed this."
 He hands me a receipt from the
 concessions stand that he signed on the
 back. He then casually throws an ice
 James Dator
 @James...
 cream cone in the trash can and sees his
 movie
 26
 t 639
 13.8K
 James Dator
 @James Dator
 realize later that he bought an
 ice cream cone he didn't want,
 just to get receipt paper so he
 could scribble his autograph for a
 16-year-old idiot.
 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone
 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes
awesomacious:

Sweet Keanu

awesomacious: Sweet Keanu