ice


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    
        

            

                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        News Australia
        

            
            News Australia
        

    

    

         
News Australia

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Tourist
        

            
            Tourist
        

    

    

         
Tourist

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        to-do-with
        

            
            to-do-with
        

    

    

         
to-do-with

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         blanket
        

            
             blanket
        

    

    

         
 blanket

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         iced
        

            
             iced
        

    

    

         
 iced

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         like comment share
        

            
             like comment share
        

    

    

         
 like comment share

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        were
        

            
            were
        

    

    

         
were

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        yours
        

            
            yours
        

    

    

         
yours

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        ons
        

            
            ons
        

    

    

         
ons

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        kidding
        

            
            kidding
        

    

    

         
kidding

    



                
            

        

    
    

        🔥 | Latest
    

    
    

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Not the ice cream I wanted as a kid, but the ice cream I deserved.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Not the ice cream I wanted as a kid, but the ice cream I deserved.
                
            

            
            
Not the ice cream I wanted as a kid, but the ice cream I deserved.

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: thesassyducks:
This duck visited the ice castles and look at how amazing they are 😱🥶💙
(Source)

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: thesassyducks:
This duck visited the ice castles and look at how amazing they are 😱🥶💙
(Source)

                
            

            
            
thesassyducks:
This duck visited the ice castles and look at how amazing they are 😱🥶💙
(Source)


            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Everyone needs an ice bear in their lives.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Everyone needs an ice bear in their lives.
                
            

            
            
Everyone needs an ice bear in their lives.

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Me no understand off-ice
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Me no understand off-ice
                
            

            
            
Me no understand off-ice

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

                
            

            
            
cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the g...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: lolzandtrollz:

Found This At A Local Ice Cream Shop
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: lolzandtrollz:

Found This At A Local Ice Cream Shop
                
            

            
            
lolzandtrollz:

Found This At A Local Ice Cream Shop

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: I’m eating ice cream in bed right now by _jun_yi_
MORE MEMES
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: I’m eating ice cream in bed right now by _jun_yi_
MORE MEMES
                
            

            
            
I’m eating ice cream in bed right now by _jun_yi_
MORE MEMES

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Wife asked for ice cream. Hers is beans. I’m a terrible person
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Wife asked for ice cream. Hers is beans. I’m a terrible person
                
            

            
            
Wife asked for ice cream. Hers is beans. I’m a terrible person

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Day 12 of quarantine: I traversed the microwave and accidentally spilled ice all over the kitchen floor. Girlfriend was pissed but it’s all water under the fridge now…
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Day 12 of quarantine: I traversed the microwave and accidentally spilled ice all over the kitchen floor. Girlfriend was pissed but it’s all water under the fridge now…
                
            

            
            
Day 12 of quarantine: I traversed the microwave and accidentally spilled ice all over the kitchen floor. Girlfriend was pissed but it’s a...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Ice Cream Shop
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Ice Cream Shop
                
            

            
            
Ice Cream Shop

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: SsSsSsSsSnek by Ice-Juice1
MORE MEMES
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: SsSsSsSsSnek by Ice-Juice1
MORE MEMES
                
            

            
            
SsSsSsSsSnek by Ice-Juice1
MORE MEMES

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Extra YEPperoni on that Pizza by Ice-Juice1
MORE MEMES
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Extra YEPperoni on that Pizza by Ice-Juice1
MORE MEMES
                
            

            
            
Extra YEPperoni on that Pizza by Ice-Juice1
MORE MEMES

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Cold as ice [OC]
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Cold as ice [OC]
                
            

            
            
Cold as ice [OC]

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: quiteliterallyhotsauce:

ICE = Gestapo



pure fucking evil.



    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: quiteliterallyhotsauce:

ICE = Gestapo



pure fucking evil.



                
            

            
            
quiteliterallyhotsauce:

ICE = Gestapo



pure fucking evil.




            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Great ice breaker
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Great ice breaker
                
            

            
            
Great ice breaker

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Phallic Ice
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Phallic Ice
                
            

            
            
Phallic Ice

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Apply ice to burned area
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Apply ice to burned area
                
            

            
            
Apply ice to burned area

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: ice age baby 🔫😤
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: ice age baby 🔫😤
                
            

            
            
ice age baby 🔫😤

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Ice Age baby bad apparently
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Ice Age baby bad apparently
                
            

            
            
Ice Age baby bad apparently

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Lemme lick it like ice cream (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Lemme lick it like ice cream (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)
                
            

            
            
Lemme lick it like ice cream (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Lemme lick it like ice cream
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Lemme lick it like ice cream
                
            

            
            
Lemme lick it like ice cream

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Ordered an espresso shot over ice this morning..
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Ordered an espresso shot over ice this morning..
                
            

            
            
Ordered an espresso shot over ice this morning..

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: kiwi ice cream good by Dylanturtlesturtles
MORE MEMES
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: kiwi ice cream good by Dylanturtlesturtles
MORE MEMES
                
            

            
            
kiwi ice cream good by Dylanturtlesturtles
MORE MEMES

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: kiwi ice cream good
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: kiwi ice cream good
                
            

            
            
kiwi ice cream good

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: I wanna hear the ice scream tbh by xhevin19
MORE MEMES
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: I wanna hear the ice scream tbh by xhevin19
MORE MEMES
                
            

            
            
I wanna hear the ice scream tbh by xhevin19
MORE MEMES

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Man of ice! Woman of fire! Bring me the baby!
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Man of ice! Woman of fire! Bring me the baby!
                
            

            
            
Man of ice! Woman of fire! Bring me the baby!

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Man I really like this new ice-cream!
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Man I really like this new ice-cream!
                
            

            
            
Man I really like this new ice-cream!

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Bitches lookin like neopolatin ice cream
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Bitches lookin like neopolatin ice cream
                
            

            
            
Bitches lookin like neopolatin ice cream

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: dynastylnoire:

writernotwaiting:

hellenhighwater:

astolen98saturnsedan:

luadell:

thisnewdevilry:

sputnikcentury:

teapotsahoy:

lovedsomuch:

warsfeils:

anubituf:

harukami:

last-snowfall:

weareallmedie:

firedanceryote:

reptila-tequila:

qeilla:

thefreckledavantgardegoober:

mysticmisfit89:

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”
like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING
Moose are terrifying, you guys.

I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist.
I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside.

If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah. 
Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month. 
Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD.
Moose. MOOSE.

I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this.

The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that.

Moose confirmed for actual kaiju.


Kaiju category: Maple.  


Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive. 

@ssalogel

For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is 

4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant”

And they can run up to 40 miles per hour


A 16 wheeler with fur

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: dynastylnoire:

writernotwaiting:

hellenhighwater:

astolen98saturnsedan:

luadell:

thisnewdevilry:

sputnikcentury:

teapotsahoy:

lovedsomuch:

warsfeils:

anubituf:

harukami:

last-snowfall:

weareallmedie:

firedanceryote:

reptila-tequila:

qeilla:

thefreckledavantgardegoober:

mysticmisfit89:

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”
like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING
Moose are terrifying, you guys.

I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist.
I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside.

If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah. 
Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month. 
Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD.
Moose. MOOSE.

I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this.

The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that.

Moose confirmed for actual kaiju.


Kaiju category: Maple.  


Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive. 

@ssalogel

For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is 

4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant”

And they can run up to 40 miles per hour


A 16 wheeler with fur

                
            

            
            
dynastylnoire:

writernotwaiting:

hellenhighwater:

astolen98saturnsedan:

luadell:

thisnewdevilry:

sputnikcentury:

teapotsahoy:

lov...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Clear as ice.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Clear as ice.
                
            

            
            
Clear as ice.

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Clear as ice. by _Ronin07
MORE MEMES
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Clear as ice. by _Ronin07
MORE MEMES
                
            

            
            
Clear as ice. by _Ronin07
MORE MEMES

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    ice: Cool as ice?
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                ice: Cool as ice?
                
            

            
            
Cool as ice?