✅ 25+ Best Memes About Have a

Friday, Memes, and Cross: Here. The “Hey” is for Jackson Friday Night, the “Whaaaat” goes in Cross The Line, and so does the last sound. Have a great show! https://t.co/RZnqhrLHD9 https://t.co/IZuFh4tB16

Here. The “Hey” is for Jackson Friday Night, the “Whaaaat” goes in Cross The Line, and so does the last sound. Have a great show! https://t....

Crying, Not Crying, and Sorry: m sorry |Do you have a magic spell to return Someone Why dent you ife? tell me about them? oh No. Will that bring them back? For us. For a little While different Stories are a Knd of megic. mna Twistwood Aug 31 at 12:18 AM. A short story i drew based on words by A Small Fiction on twitter. awesomacious: I’m not crying, you’re crying

awesomacious: I’m not crying, you’re crying

Mondays, Say It, and Home: Colley @JamColley Garfield is a cat and doesn't have a job. The only ostensible difference between Monday and any other day is that Jon suddenly isn't around after having been home all weekend. Garfield doesn't hate Mondays, he loves Jon and is too proud to say it. 18/02/2018, 02:05 6,385 Retweets 24.4K Likes Garfield loves Jon

Garfield loves Jon

Sad, Irl, and Me IRL: You need a hobby I have a hobby Being sad isn't a hobby me_irl

me_irl

Af, Dad, and Girls: When the girl you met online is hot Af. But you have a dad bod Don't make me run! Im full of chocolate! All these girls be so fit!

All these girls be so fit!

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Beautiful, Juice, and Lol: mistress-flamecaller: tinymothman plague-sprite This is the single greatest thing I've ever impulse bought. My previous pencil pouch was a realistic juice box but the shock factor on THIS THING IS BETTER. Wait until I pull this out in class i have a mighty need. This is beautiful Photos Source: plague-sprite lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

Beautiful, Juice, and Lol: mistress-flamecaller: tinymothman plague-sprite This is the single greatest thing I've ever impulse bought. My previous pencil pouch was a realistic juice box but the shock factor on THIS THING IS BETTER. Wait until I pull this out in class i have a mighty need. This is beautiful Photos Source: plague-sprite lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Target, The Office, and Tumblr: Do you have a question, Kelly? Yeah, 0 have a lot of questions Number one How dare you? ** ** femestella:Mindy Kaling: I Felt Embarrassed For Being the Diversity Hire on ‘The Office’

femestella:Mindy Kaling: I Felt Embarrassed For Being the Diversity Hire on ‘The Office’

Books, Doctor, and Elf: can p 2.25, Indexes 1-9 (in case Fava his Own they aver do that was worth remembering? I mean, Doctor Doom is okay, but, ke, he's no Spinerette, eh?) 3000.00 1-3, 18.00, 4-6, 19.00 (does anybody really care? I mean these are just warmed over Kull stories, nght? Or is it Kull who's warmed over Conan? I can never remember.) 100-103, 10.00, 104-106, 11.00, 107-109, 12.00, 110-125, 13.00 100-103, 10.00, 104-106, 11.00, 107-109, 12.00, 110-125 13 00 100-103 realy Sne pleats nightin there the book That's what Fm askin' you ELEKTRA ASSASSIN 1-4, lots and lots of money ELFQUEST you haven't memorized everything yet), 1.25, set 1-9, 10.00, Chronicles (1982) 1.50 AVENGERS 1, forget it! Even if I had one I wouldn't sell it to you. 2. Are you kidding? After the lame offers you made for the old Spider-Man stuff? 3, no way, Jose. 4, And you can forget this one altogether! (Captain Amenica) 5. m goin' straight to the recent stuff again. 140, WHAT...2 HOW...5 150, 2.50, 151, 153, 154, 8.00 (no reason) 200-202, 6, manbe 7 upks a piece. 203, Man 100-1 104-106 1-present, 1,00.00-se9, the ORDERING INSTRUCTIONS: This sd expirem 12.00 110 (1) All orders must be mailed in, temized Derek and/or Kate Smth in the nude We w ont have to This is cur ad so we play by ur e wolves died, and Richard and Wendy got evicted and we need to raise money for (2) Minimum mail order s $1000 00 Why sho them. In fact, don't even buy the sport or something? You thirk we lke comic the comics, just call paying for them, we're out ot here 1-800-ELF-HELP and plecge (3) You must have a street address as wete iocal comic acednact Youm DON'T ASK QUESTIONS! WE'RE HEAVILY INTO THE ZEN SH-SHE-HULK! IT ONLY WORKS IFPOD o YOU DON'T a FOLLOW ME, anG NOW sAndm CON WHERE CHA S THIS 1-6 this ge Comprend RYSTA ! A ha! Hal Ha! Ha! Ha! !Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! to kno ALL OF THINK ABOUT IT!Foreign ak Ou that Canadiaihro PLACE 2/You wa F COMIC BOOKS A Your non y and youd ge at the Mint get a Spi 99211 213, 215, oing to stop HERE for every last FTCKen I'm gonna start jacking up the prices on every book that has the High Evolutionary in it! In fact, I'm gonna jack up the prices on books that even use the "evolution!" 100-103, 1 104-106, 11.00, 107- that stuff? Somebo pay for it! 10.00, 104-10 11.00 110-125 10.00 07-109. 3.00 104-106, S.12.00, $00 100-103. 107 Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! a! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha al Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! You Want this? ewhole set, 18.00 15 12.00, 110-125, 13 Y0-125 T09 3.00 100-103-10.00. 04-106, 11.00, 107-109 00, 110-125, 13.00 03, 10.00, 104-106 107-109, 12.00, 5, 13.00 100-103, 104-106, 11.00, 109, 12.00, 110-125 .00 100-103, 10.00 04-106, 11.00: 107-109 00, 110-125, 13.00 ( 100-103, 10.00, 10 11.00, 107-109, 17 110-125, 13.00 10.00, 104-106 107-109, 12.00 EVIL re they still printing e? I thought they celled it after Miller left. I Ner cared for it much nyway. Expect for the hiddle period.. You know? When he was fighting, like, aliens and stuff? Now that was comics! 100-103, 10.00, 125. 00 07-109, T125, 13.00 03, 10.00, 104-106. 1.00, 107-109, 12.00, 110-125, 13.0O 100-103. 13.001 104 TU125, 13.00 (yeah, I know the price is supposed to go 24 Don’t think about it.

Don’t think about it.

Weed, Help, and Time: That evening 1 borely mannged to caeince yse t awalk Mew Mew The ewing besnd soanded a little straige, ke i was hurt Uoder the car a ltle shadow could be seen dragging its lower body Alte snanching the cat eut it became appareet that nething was clwrty wrarg with is leg Sea call ws made a Sellow cat oer iend The two od s spod of on an E-bibe with the attle guy But nce we g hi hee, might as well help him al the way Se the surgery was agreed to After sone checking the vet eplned the als stuatin, whch wio nat the bat Herieg how sach a smat aninal needed gery ade my haart sank Os the wy out, a fw things bean to wany ae ి "Befare being addopted the hitnen will sill need foster c. What if1 grow attached? e jast iagining snene Am I realy to have a c? It's a b athy d l all tht ba adopting the o at this po respensibüty "What II cat take gsod care of it 's not smethinglon hack aut wsily Dos the ot vea rame im, na He's jstastray It seems w gs more ratiosal that Whea tae vot asked for a naneintentialy aded gving one Somybe there want be to much attachnent aher all how I sed to be thisking te myselt. P prudaf this peroal rewth MEW Dut n the day of visiting the kitten ter a successfal sorgery Icould only think of one weed the whele time Cap crap crap crap Wholesome Comic

Wholesome Comic

Cute, Love, and Meme: When you make a meme of your cute doggo but it only gets 5 upvotes But she's a precious girl either way and we still love her hope you have a good day guys

hope you have a good day guys

Never, You, and Really: WHEN YOU HAVE A CONNECTION WITH SOMEONE IT NEVER REALLY GOES AWAY.

Elf, Target, and Tumblr: BAOPu #9 ELF CARE TO DO LIST WRITE DOWN X THE THouGHT5 THAT HAUNT You READ WHEN You CAN'T HAVE A CONVERSATION BRING HOME FLOWERS, □ TALK O THINK STILL BE klND NO MATTER WHAT 0 □TRY NOT TO LIE □ ToucH EVEN TO YOURSELF cwote: take care of yourself today and every day :)

cwote: take care of yourself today and every day :)

Fucking, History, and Clue: Friend: This isn't Caesar Salad Me: You Don't have a Fucking Clue About History History Bitc–

History Bitc–

Dank, Fucking, and Memes: Friend: This isn't Caesar Salad Me: You Don't have a Fucking Clue About History History Bitc– by pychiticatitsfinest MORE MEMES

History Bitc– by pychiticatitsfinest MORE MEMES

Soul, May, and Steal: i may not have a soul but i'll suck until i steal yours X Redheads these days

Redheads these days

A Dream, Work, and Capitalism: Selam @selamisandwich The greatest scam capitalism ever pulled was convincing us that a job was a part of our dreams kb @_therealkaybee 30 Jul i don't even think i have a "dream job" anymore. i just literally don't want to work. Show this thread Meirl

Meirl

Animals, Monster, and Sex: foreverdreamsofnever: stvky: rainymeadows: somethingpointy: Vampire doctors that can smell if you have a blood disease. Werewolf therapy animals for sick kids. Nature sprite and nymph nurses that always make sure people have pretty flowers to brighten up their white rooms. Fauns that go around and sing and dance for patients so that they smile. Nice monster hospitals would be amazing Someone write a book about this. Sirens that help people with sex addiction Why isn't this television. Id read and watch the shiit outta this.

Id read and watch the shiit outta this.

Lol, Tumblr, and Blog: You didn't say you I don't,I have a had a girlfriend wife awesomesthesia: Lol

awesomesthesia: Lol

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Boyfriend, Who, and Finally: FINALLY HAVE A BOYFRIEND WHO DOESN'T TREAT MY WEIRDNESS AS A BURDEN I’m mentally disabled and finally with someone who understands my oddities :,)

I’m mentally disabled and finally with someone who understands my oddities :,)

Android, Beautiful, and Cars: Ditz McGee @DitzMcGeee 1969: i bet in 50 yrs, we'll have a cars. on Mars, & flying colony 2019: Henzi Rémoulade's SAY CHEESE cookbook CHEESE PRINTER popnp To create beautiful meals for your family, just say "Cheese!" Heen R WORST BUY e&Ty 7:36 PM 24 Jun 19 Twitter for Android

Betty White, Poop, and Queen: shen the bird @Shen the_Bird me: y'know when someone else is in the stall next to you and you have a stand off where you both refuse to poop first, i feel like that's what betty white and the queen are doing but about dying my dentist: i said stop talking

Being Alone, Android, and Disney: Macaulay Culkin @Incredible Culk I have a big problem with this petitio... I'm actually 39 years old. Lawrence Ward @LawrWard 3d Disney are remaking Home Alone. This is a petition for them to re-cast 38 year old Macauley Culkin as 9 year old Kevin McCallister and have nobody in the film acknowledge it. Show this thread 1:11.07 Sep 19 Twitter for Android 12.3K Retweets 112K Likes Macaulay Culkin@Incredibl... 17h Also, you spelled my name wrong... Otherwise I'm 100% behind this idea. L578 163 14.6K Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin

Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin

Alive, Clothes, and Comfortable: I know you're sad, so I won't tell you to have a good day. Instead, I advise you to simply have a day. Stay alive, feed yourself well, wear comfortable clothes, and don't give up on yourself just yet. It'll get better. Until then, have a day.

MeIRL, Bed, and Because: me sweating in bed because i must have a blanket no matter the temperature Meirl

Meirl

Cats, Children, and Crazy: iedic WANTED: to BORROW an orange cat Wanted: to BORROW an orange cat for 24-48 hours, to have a lasagna dinner with Garfield- loving 4-year-old and 2-year-old children. Will return cat happy and cared for. Cat will not be required to eat lasagna if contraindicated. Please. No feral cats. And please take your cat back at the end. Not looking to adopt. Thank you, An increasingly desperate (but not craży) mom of-two with no friends that own orange cats Call or text: theoldmegisdead: hurricane-overseas: the-at-symbol: 30-minute-memes: Wanted: Orange Cat https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.thisisinsider.com/garfield-cat-dinner-party-2018-8 A woman successfully borrowed an orange cat for a Garfield-themed dinner party for her kids, and should really win ‘Mom of the Year’ This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen This is so pure

theoldmegisdead: hurricane-overseas: the-at-symbol: 30-minute-memes: Wanted: Orange Cat https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.thisisinsider.co...

Betty White, Poop, and Queen: shen the bird @Shen the_Bird me: y'know when someone else is in the stall next to you and you have a stand off where you both refuse to poop first, i feel like that's what betty white and the queen are doing but about dying my dentist: i said stop talking Meirl

Meirl

Betty White, Dank, and Memes: shen the bird @Shen the_Bird me: y'know when someone else is in the stall next to you and you have a stand off where you both refuse to poop first, i feel like that's what betty white and the queen are doing but about dying my dentist: i said stop talking Meirl by english_gritts MORE MEMES

Meirl by english_gritts MORE MEMES

Cold, Hate, and Right: When I have a cold: Right nostril Left nostril: I hate being ill…

I hate being ill…

Empathy, Superpower, and You: YOU HAVE A SUPERPOWER AND IT'S CALLED EMPATHY.

Animals, Apparently, and Bad: THE DAIRY INDUSTRY WANTS TO MAKE IT ILLEGAL FOR PLANT BASED MILK LABELS TO USE THE WORD MILK. COW'S MILK CASHEW MILK ALMOND MILK THEY SAY THEY WANT TRUTH IN ADVERTISING. OKAY, LETS DO THAT PLANTBASEDNEWS.ORG ORIGINAL SOURCE: MILK HURTS PBN thebluehue22: dairyisntscary: champawattigress: agro-carnist: sebbysheepie: I fully agree with giving nut milks a new name. Because they can be confused with dairy milk and for those of us with nut allergies it could be deadly over those that just have lactose intolerance and have a bad stomachache. However making a label showing you killing a cow don’t make sense as dairy wouldn’t be giving milk if they where shot.. mind you if your trying to say that dairy is evil then you should also point out the issues with the nut milks as well. A large poison symbol perhaps for those of us that it would kill. Or the “may cause cancer” on the fortified ones. Apparently when you shoot a calf in the head, milk comes out instead of blood and brain matter. Who knew? So, should we also change the cashew milk bottles pic so that it better represents the atrocious conditions of the workers who have to shell each nut by hand? Maybe a cigarette box style image of their mangled blistered palms? Or just some text to let people know that these people (mostly women) are often paid as little as two pounds a day for their labour? Or are y’all just totally transparent about how little of a shit you give about people nowadays? MoSt cAsHewS sRe fEd tO liVesToCk dOnTcHa kNow vegans only care about animals, not the horrible conditions HUMAN WORKERS ARE PUT THROUGH. A lot of them are also really shit at caring about animals if we’re being honest.

thebluehue22: dairyisntscary: champawattigress: agro-carnist: sebbysheepie: I fully agree with giving nut milks a new name. Because they...

Good, Hair, and Time: AI @alllisun It's like... you WANT long hair but short hair is so in and trendy rn. But every time you have short hair you want long hair, and when you have long hair you have this wild desire to just CHOP IT ALL OFF. Anyway, have a good day.

Memes, 🤖, and You: I'm just a porpoise Here to say you have a purpose https://t.co/NuZRukYJt1

https://t.co/NuZRukYJt1

Target, Tumblr, and Best: HEy I'M NEW T THIS FANDOM. WELCOME! WE'RE SMALL BUT WE HAVE SOME FANART AND FANFICS HAVE A Look AROUND FANFICS ExCUSE ME. MERCH I NetD TO 60 BACk to y LUIFE Now WHERE'S THE MERC FAN PIC EXIT THERE is No ExiT ask-link-the-hylian-champion: starfleetrambo: leejean33: bea-the-hufflepanda: moriartyfortheevening: fandomsincluded: I will never not reblog this Accurate. This is the best post I’ve ever seen accurate Guys, OP here. Please stop deleting my captions. How are the rest supposed to know that the receptionist is Satan YALL STOP DELETING CAPTIONS THIS WAS AN IMPORTANT DEVELOPMENT

ask-link-the-hylian-champion: starfleetrambo: leejean33: bea-the-hufflepanda: moriartyfortheevening: fandomsincluded: I will never not...

Phone, One, and You: Shaheryar @Alamaiqball Stop checking your phone every minute, no one loves you. You have a lot of nerve being right

Gif, Smooth, and Lamborghini: 9:59 Gmail < Hannah Today 9:28 PM Damn. Do you have a favourite place? Costa Rica, but that'Ill probably drop to second after I've visited your place Today 9:48 PM Damn that was smooth Don't worry it gets rough Does it really? Safe word is Lamborghini Isnt that a bit too long? You'll be saying that once I drop my pants How are you this smooth Send Type a message GIF (« Smooth

Smooth

MeIRL, Bed, and Because: me sweating in bed because i must have a blanket no matter the temperature Meirl

Meirl

Bed, Because, and Sweating: me sweating in bed because i must have a blanket no matter the temperature

I Bet, School, and House: Thanos @Slim_Thanos "When are you graduating?" "What have you studied?" "Do you have a house?" "I bet you're as intelligent as you were in high school and doing a great course"

Orgy, Shit, and Wow: me walking into an orgy /demroenez Wow, I have a lot of people to disappoint. Ah shit, here we go again

Ah shit, here we go again

Amazon, Fire, and Money: X $ Ecosia, a search engine that use 80% of their profits to plant trees, is planting 1 Million trees in Brazil after the Amazon Rainforest fire tragedy The Happy Broadcast G I don't want to play with you anymore howaboutfondue: filthygrandpa: The only way we can help Guys! They also have a shop where you can buy t-shirts that provide them money for planting the trees in Brazil! Also each t-shirt you buy is 20 planted trees! Check out their shop!! Please reblog this, they need as much help as they can get.

howaboutfondue: filthygrandpa: The only way we can help Guys! They also have a shop where you can buy t-shirts that provide them money fo...

Beautiful, Juice, and Lol: mistress-flamecaller: tinymothman plague-sprite This is the single greatest thing I've ever impulse bought. My previous pencil pouch was a realistic juice box but the shock factor on THIS THING IS BETTER. Wait until I pull this out in class i have a mighty need. This is beautiful Photos Source: plague-sprite lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

Beautiful, Juice, and Lol: mistress-flamecaller: tinymothman plague-sprite This is the single greatest thing I've ever impulse bought. My previous pencil pouch was a realistic juice box but the shock factor on THIS THING IS BETTER. Wait until I pull this out in class i have a mighty need. This is beautiful Photos Source: plague-sprite lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

lol-coaster: Fish Zipper Pouch

Heart, Can, and Them: you treat them like they have a heart like yours but not everyone can be as soft and as tender you don't see the person they are you see the person they have the potential to be you give and give till they pull everything out of you and leave you empty

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🔥 | Latest