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Bad, Jesus, and Lol: Today jesus you are rough on pants 331 A get angry with them that have to wear them. 700 AM holy hell, there are better ways to deal with that than to mas- sacre them. Most of us just, stay with me here... Take them off poor things did nothing to you. 740 AM The First step is admitting vou have a problem though. so it sounds like you've accepted your role in this and are ready for the next step. 744 AM Absolutely ready for the next step. Just not sure what that is lol 749 AM we've got to get you out of them and to an environment where you can't hurt them anymore. we in the industry call this place, 'South, I've been there, and you wouldn't believe it. there is not a single pant in sight. the good news is Im an expert at finding this mysterious place. I can guide you out of those pants and in to something far less appropriate 756 AM Sounds like an excellent next step 804 AM I think we need to rehearse before we take any drastic steps I'm going to need to see what I'm getting myself into. 811 AM Rehearsal is a must 812 AM Rehearsals start Monday Anytime that works for you. I do make house calls, but it's going to cost you extra 816 AM Oh darn. Not sure I can afford extra and leave a nice tip В19 АМ Don't worry about the tip, we can work something out а21 AN Oh perfect! 822 AM for my records I'm going to need you to fill out these forms. Full name: Proffered Contact: requested Appointment time Location 824 AM reason for visit 824 AM 9:45pm .I've been naughty.. 8:25 AM ille Oh forgot one. 826 AM Ok I've got you booked in for Monday I will be out of the office this weekend but just in case things get bad and you need to talk, ill keep my phone on me. looking forvward to touching bases with you and getting you out of those pants. 834 A Sounds great. Thanks so much for all the help and support 8:35 AM +pes meesnge She had 5 photos with ripped jeans
Bad, Jesus, and Lol: Today
 jesus you are rough on pants
 331 A
 get angry with them that
 have to wear them.
 700 AM
 holy hell, there are better ways
 to deal with that than to mas-
 sacre them. Most of us just, stay
 with me here... Take them off
 poor things did nothing to you.
 740 AM
 The First step is admitting vou
 have a problem though. so it
 sounds like you've accepted your
 role in this and are ready for the
 next step.
 744 AM
 Absolutely ready for the
 next step. Just not sure
 what that is lol
 749 AM
 we've got to get you out of them
 and to an environment where
 you can't hurt them anymore.
 we in the industry call this place,
 'South, I've been there, and you
 wouldn't believe it. there is not
 a single pant in sight. the good
 news is Im an expert at finding
 this mysterious place. I can guide
 you out of those pants and in to
 something far less appropriate
 756 AM
 Sounds like an excellent
 next step
 804 AM
 I think we need to rehearse
 before we take any drastic steps
 I'm going to need to see what I'm
 getting myself into.
 811 AM
 Rehearsal is a must
 812 AM
 Rehearsals start Monday Anytime
 that works for you. I do make
 house calls, but it's going to cost
 you extra
 816 AM
 Oh darn. Not sure I can
 afford extra and leave a
 nice tip
 В19 АМ
 Don't worry about the tip, we can
 work something out
 а21 AN
 Oh perfect!
 822 AM
 for my records I'm going to need
 you to fill out these forms.
 Full name:
 Proffered Contact:
 requested Appointment
 time
 Location
 824 AM
 reason for visit
 824 AM
 9:45pm
 .I've been naughty..
 8:25 AM
 ille
 Oh forgot one.
 826 AM
 Ok I've got you booked in for
 Monday I will be out of the office
 this weekend but just in case
 things get bad and you need
 to talk, ill keep my phone on
 me. looking forvward to touching
 bases with you and getting you
 out of those pants.
 834 A
 Sounds great. Thanks so
 much for all the help and
 support
 8:35 AM
 +pes meesnge
She had 5 photos with ripped jeans

She had 5 photos with ripped jeans

Animals, Deer, and Fucking: I HAVE TINY CRUSTACEANS STUCK IN MY GILLS! I'M HUNGRY FOR SEA BUGS! WHITETIP SHARK CLEANER WRASSE I NEED SOMEONE TO CARRY MY POLLEN TO OTHER FLOWERS I NEED NECTAR TO EAT! TICKSEED FLOWERS BUCKEYE BUTTERFLY l'M LOOKING FOR A BIG MEAL, BUT I NEED HELP FINDING A DEER I WANT TO EAT VENISON, BUT I'M TOO SMALL TO HUNT DEER! COMMON RAVEN COYOTE I NEED SOMEONE TO KEEP ANTS FROM EATING MY EGGS! I WANT A HOME WITH A BODYGUARD AND FREE ANT DELIVERY INCLUDED! COLOMBIAN LESSERBLACK TARANTULA DOTTED HUMMING FROG M. TILLERY - CYANEUS.COM /w/Av[ paramud: personal-scientist: draconym: themaishi: draconym: Mutualistic pairs for an “Odd Couples” Valentine’s program at my work. (Why do so many of my big work projects revolve around Valentine’s programs?) Also, by “sea bugs,” I obviously meant “gnathiid isopod larvae.” The himan one is not as good as the rest If you mean the mutualism between humans and honeyguides, I respectfully disagree. Human/honeyguide mutualism is one of the most sophisticated interspecies relationships in the animal kingdom. While humans have domesticated many other animals for their labor, the honeyguide remains entirely wild while electing to partner up with humans. Both humans and honeyguides have each developed specific calls to signal to one another that they are on the hunt, and these calls greatly increase the likelihood of success. According to this paper: The production of this sound increased the probability of being guided by a honeyguide from about 33 to 66% and the overall probability of thus finding a bees’ nest from 17 to 54%, as compared with other animal or human sounds of similar amplitude. That’s fucking bonkers, you guys!!! There are people out there who over the course of human history have created a sound to communicate with birds, and the birds themselves have a Human Call they use to communicate with us. There is no other wild animal you can just make noises at and immediately communicate that you want it to come help you!!! What’s more, many scientists consider this relationship more exploitative on the honeyguide’s end than on our end! That’s unprecedented!! These birds have essentially negotiated a trade deal with humanity!!!! This is the stuff of fantasy movies, except it’s real. Here’s an article from The Guardian about the broader implications of this kind of relationship with wild animals. It’s a good read: Apart from with our gut bacteria, we humans don’t really have any mutualistic relationships with other creatures. There is no special tune that we can sing to magically attract nearby hedgehogs into our gardens to feast on slugs. There will never be a special wink that fishermen can offer otters, encouraging them to catch fish that we might then de-bone for them, in return for some of the catch. The world is poorer for this. OKAY BUT the noise we make at honeyguides is one of my favorite noises there is, and if y’all haven’t heard the “BRRR-HM?” call that hunters use to summon honeyguides you are SERIOUSLY missing out. There’s an audio clip on the Audobon Society’s article about them [link] @metalpaca
Animals, Deer, and Fucking: I HAVE TINY CRUSTACEANS
 STUCK IN MY GILLS!
 I'M HUNGRY FOR SEA BUGS!
 WHITETIP SHARK
 CLEANER WRASSE
 I NEED SOMEONE TO CARRY
 MY POLLEN TO OTHER FLOWERS
 I NEED NECTAR TO EAT!
 TICKSEED FLOWERS
 BUCKEYE BUTTERFLY
 l'M LOOKING FOR A BIG MEAL,
 BUT I NEED HELP FINDING A DEER
 I WANT TO EAT VENISON, BUT
 I'M TOO SMALL TO HUNT DEER!
 COMMON RAVEN
 COYOTE
 I NEED SOMEONE TO KEEP
 ANTS FROM EATING MY EGGS!
 I WANT A HOME WITH A BODYGUARD
 AND FREE ANT DELIVERY INCLUDED!
 COLOMBIAN LESSERBLACK TARANTULA
 DOTTED HUMMING FROG
 M. TILLERY - CYANEUS.COM
 /w/Av[
paramud:

personal-scientist:
draconym:

themaishi:

draconym:

Mutualistic pairs for an “Odd Couples” Valentine’s program at my work. (Why do so many of my big work projects revolve around Valentine’s programs?)
Also, by “sea bugs,” I obviously meant “gnathiid isopod larvae.”


The himan one is not as good as the rest 

If you mean the mutualism between humans and honeyguides, I respectfully disagree. Human/honeyguide mutualism is one of the most sophisticated interspecies relationships in the animal kingdom.
While humans have domesticated many other animals for their labor, the honeyguide remains entirely wild while electing to partner up with humans. Both humans and honeyguides have each developed specific calls to signal to one another that they are on the hunt, and these calls greatly increase the likelihood of success. According to this paper:
The production of this sound increased the probability of being guided 
by a honeyguide from about 33 to 66% and the overall probability of thus
 finding a bees’ nest from 17 to 54%, as compared with other animal or 
human sounds of similar amplitude.
That’s fucking bonkers, you guys!!! There are people out there who over the course of human history have created a sound to communicate with birds, and the birds themselves have a Human Call they use to communicate with us. There is no other wild animal you can just make noises at and immediately communicate that you want it to come help you!!!
What’s more, many scientists consider this relationship more exploitative on the honeyguide’s end than on our end! That’s unprecedented!! These birds have essentially negotiated a trade deal with humanity!!!! This is the stuff of fantasy movies, except it’s real.
Here’s an article from The Guardian about the broader implications of this kind of relationship with wild animals. It’s a good read:

Apart from with our gut bacteria, we humans don’t really have any 
mutualistic relationships with other creatures. There is no special tune
 that we can sing to magically attract nearby hedgehogs into our gardens
 to feast on slugs. There will never be a special wink that fishermen 
can offer otters, encouraging them to catch fish that we might then 
de-bone for them, in return for some of the catch. The world is poorer 
for this.



OKAY BUT the noise we make at honeyguides is one of my favorite noises there is, and if y’all haven’t heard the “BRRR-HM?” call that hunters use to summon honeyguides you are SERIOUSLY missing out. 
There’s an audio clip on the Audobon Society’s article about them [link]


@metalpaca

paramud: personal-scientist: draconym: themaishi: draconym: Mutualistic pairs for an “Odd Couples” Valentine’s program at my work. (Why ...

Being Alone, Batman, and Friends: HIS PARENTS DIED WHEN HE WAS SO YOUNG SHOT KILLED RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM HIS WHOLE PLANET WAS DESTROYED HE'S THE LAST OF A HOLOCAUST HE WAS RAISED ALONE HE GREW UP IN THE DIRT A KID IN A HUGE MANSION FINDING OUT SLOWLY HOW DIFFERENT HE WAS WITH HIS MEMORIES OF HIS MOTHER AND FATHER A STRANGER DISCOVERING EVERY DAY HOw STRANGE HE WAS HE HAD LOVE, AND THEY TOOK IT FROM HIM НЕ SHOULD BE A KILLER HE HAS THE POWER TO TEAR THE HE SHOULD WANT TO TEAR THE WORLD APART FOR WHAT IT DID WORLD APART AND HE COULD WITH A PINKIE. HIS WORLD. WE'RE IT'S NOT NOT HIS PEOPLE. WE SHOULD BE ANTS TO HIM IMAGINE THAT. ALWAYS BEING ON THE OUTSIDE THE PAIN THAT WOULD COME FROM ALWAYS BEING ON THE OUTSIDE AND YET HE TOOK THAT PAIN THAT SHOCK OF DEATH AND YET HE TOOK THAT PAIN AND BECAME THE SYMBOL OF HOPE AND HE TURNED IT INTO HOPE I HAD THE LOVE OF PARENTS, I HAD MA AND PA THE WHOLE WAY I'M JUST A RICH KID FROM THE CITY I KNEW MY PARENTS I KNEW WHO I WAS, WHAT I HAD TO BE. I HAD A CHILD HOOD FULL OF LAUGHING AND LEARNING I HAVE POWERS. I HAD TO DO THIS ALL HE HAS ARE HIS WITS AND HIS CHOOSES TO I DIDN'T HAVE ANY CHOICE BUT TO BE WHO I AM AND HE DO THIS WILL HE HAD EVERY CHOICE -AND HE BECAME WHO HE IS. EVERYONE WANTS TO BE HIM EVERY KID IS INSPIRED BY HIM HE'S JUST A BETTER MAN THAN I AM HE'S A BETTER MAN THAN I AM. acutelatios: samalexandxr: - He got engaged. He didn’t call me. Okay. That’s his way of telling me… We’re not friends. Not really.   - You can’t be friends with him. Not when you’re… He doesn’t need to congratulate me. Look at me. Who am I compared to him?   - He is who he is. He doesn’t need a friend. He doesn’t need… He isn’t like me.   - He’s Superman.   - He’s Batman. Batman #36 (2017) HOLY SHIT I THINK THIS IS THE NEXT PANEL?
nsfw
Being Alone, Batman, and Friends: HIS
 PARENTS
 DIED WHEN
 HE WAS SO
 YOUNG
 SHOT
 KILLED
 RIGHT IN
 FRONT OF
 HIM
 HIS WHOLE
 PLANET WAS
 DESTROYED
 HE'S THE
 LAST OF A
 HOLOCAUST
 HE WAS
 RAISED
 ALONE
 HE GREW
 UP IN THE
 DIRT
 A KID
 IN A HUGE
 MANSION
 FINDING
 OUT SLOWLY
 HOW DIFFERENT
 HE WAS
 WITH HIS
 MEMORIES OF
 HIS MOTHER AND
 FATHER
 A STRANGER
 DISCOVERING
 EVERY DAY HOw
 STRANGE HE
 WAS

 HE HAD
 LOVE, AND
 THEY TOOK IT
 FROM HIM
 НЕ
 SHOULD BE
 A KILLER
 HE HAS
 THE POWER
 TO TEAR THE
 HE SHOULD
 WANT TO TEAR
 THE WORLD APART
 FOR WHAT IT
 DID
 WORLD
 APART
 AND HE
 COULD
 WITH A
 PINKIE. HIS WORLD. WE'RE
 IT'S NOT
 NOT HIS PEOPLE. WE
 SHOULD BE ANTS
 TO HIM
 IMAGINE
 THAT. ALWAYS
 BEING ON THE
 OUTSIDE
 THE PAIN
 THAT WOULD
 COME FROM ALWAYS
 BEING ON THE
 OUTSIDE
 AND
 YET HE TOOK
 THAT PAIN
 THAT
 SHOCK OF
 DEATH
 AND YET
 HE TOOK THAT
 PAIN AND BECAME
 THE SYMBOL OF
 HOPE
 AND
 HE TURNED
 IT INTO
 HOPE

 I HAD
 THE LOVE OF
 PARENTS, I HAD
 MA AND PA
 THE WHOLE
 WAY
 I'M JUST
 A RICH KID
 FROM THE
 CITY
 I KNEW
 MY PARENTS
 I KNEW WHO I
 WAS, WHAT I
 HAD TO
 BE.
 I HAD
 A CHILD
 HOOD FULL OF
 LAUGHING AND
 LEARNING
 I HAVE
 POWERS. I
 HAD TO DO
 THIS
 ALL HE
 HAS ARE HIS
 WITS AND HIS CHOOSES TO
 I DIDN'T
 HAVE ANY CHOICE
 BUT TO BE WHO
 I AM
 AND HE
 DO THIS
 WILL
 HE
 HAD EVERY
 CHOICE
 -AND
 HE BECAME
 WHO HE
 IS.

 EVERYONE
 WANTS TO BE
 HIM
 EVERY KID
 IS INSPIRED
 BY HIM
 HE'S JUST
 A BETTER MAN
 THAN I AM
 HE'S
 A BETTER
 MAN THAN
 I AM.
acutelatios:

samalexandxr:


- He got engaged. He didn’t call me. Okay. That’s his way of telling me… We’re not friends. Not really.  
- You can’t be friends with him. Not when you’re… He doesn’t need to congratulate me. Look at me. Who am I compared to him?  
- He is who he is. He doesn’t need a friend. He doesn’t need… He isn’t like me.  
- He’s Superman.  
- He’s Batman.
Batman #36 (2017)


HOLY SHIT I THINK THIS IS THE NEXT PANEL?

acutelatios: samalexandxr: - He got engaged. He didn’t call me. Okay. That’s his way of telling me… We’re not friends. Not really.   - Yo...