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Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Apple, Hipster, and Iphone: the virgin guhnome embraces the free choice nature of FOSS the chad KDE software uncustomisable without can change colourschemes, window decorations and widget styles theming based on CSS, GTK devs had to publicly ask distros to stop theming by default buggy third party on the highly customisable extensions y through settings app CSD instead of su perior menu bars global menu master race can even become like actually listens to it's users "i have no idea what xfce guhnome if you really "your workflow is wrong" is or does sorry" need it to be extensions are secondary, nautilus is a shell of it's most features you need exist by default dolphin blows nautilus out trying to be the apple of former self, removes features i jerk off to of the water the linux DEs this shit updates break extensions and/or remove features uses traditional UI paradigms by default to help completely dependent on extensions for basic features UI refinements come in ease of use, rather than some stupid as well as every release, hipster shit animations lagged up until "innovation better so shut the fuck up" new features can fine tune how GTK apps look and behave on KDE, even down to recent versions no attempt at integrating Qt apps wobbly windows master race the theme, icon set and font MATE, cinnamon and budgie are better, left guhnome in the dust widgets by default no lets you add widgets anywhere in the desktop glorious dragon mascot "muh human interface completely shit all over the guidelines" kde connect integrated by default, mac/iphone btfo has blur and translucency previously good nature of gnome 2 options for nice aesthetics adwaita is horrificly over-padded, makes leverything ook like a tablet UI [OC] the virgin guhnome
Apple, Hipster, and Iphone: the virgin guhnome
 embraces the free choice nature of FOSS
 the chad KDE
 software
 uncustomisable without
 can change colourschemes, window
 decorations and widget styles
 theming based on CSS,
 GTK devs had to publicly
 ask distros to stop theming
 by default
 buggy third party
 on the
 highly customisable
 extensions
 y through settings app
 CSD instead of su perior
 menu bars
 global
 menu master race
 can even become like
 actually listens to it's users
 "i have no idea what xfce
 guhnome if you really
 "your workflow is
 wrong"
 is or does sorry"
 need it to be
 extensions are secondary,
 nautilus is a shell of it's
 most features you need exist
 by default
 dolphin blows nautilus out
 trying to be the apple of
 former self, removes features
 i jerk off to
 of the water
 the linux DEs
 this shit
 updates break extensions
 and/or remove features
 uses traditional UI paradigms by default
 to help
 completely dependent on extensions
 for basic features
 UI refinements come in
 ease of use, rather than some stupid
 as well as
 every release,
 hipster shit
 animations lagged up until
 "innovation
 better so shut the fuck up"
 new features
 can fine tune how GTK apps look
 and behave on KDE, even down to
 recent versions
 no attempt at integrating Qt apps
 wobbly windows master race
 the theme, icon set and font
 MATE, cinnamon and budgie
 are better, left guhnome in the
 dust
 widgets by default
 no
 lets you add widgets anywhere
 in the desktop
 glorious dragon mascot
 "muh human interface
 completely shit
 all over the
 guidelines"
 kde connect integrated by default,
 mac/iphone btfo
 has blur and translucency
 previously good
 nature of gnome 2
 options for nice aesthetics
 adwaita is horrificly over-padded, makes
 leverything ook like a tablet UI
[OC] the virgin guhnome

[OC] the virgin guhnome

Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Animals, Food, and Head: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

Beard, Cum, and Head: [-] from /u sent 7 hours ago Id carry you to the bedroom and throw you on the bed. Then with you on top straddling me, I would run my hands through your hair and pull you close. We would make out until the tension grew too intense. Id flip you off and grab your wrists. With your arms pinned down above your head I start kissing your neck making my way down to your chest. I'd slowly roll your shirt off and then slide my hands up your back just light enough to cause you to shiver. After unclasping your bra and "briefly" ad miring your tits, I'd start squeezing them and playing with your nipples. Kissing and sucking your nipples while occasionally nibbling them all while listening to your breathing grow faster. After taking care of your tits I'd start kissing your chest slowly making my way down to your thighs, lightly running my lips and beard over your skin causing goose bumps to erupt the whole way down. When I knew you were ready Id rip off your pants to find a soaking wet spot marking where your pussy has been waiting. I'd slowly peel off your panties to reveal your glistening pussy aching to be eaten. Id slowly outline your pussy with my finger while occasionally rubbing your clit. Once I thought you were teased enough Id slowly slide a finger or two in your tight pussy, sliding in and out changing speed depending you harder and harder all the while your juices quickly and generously coating my fingers. Slowly stoppingi can sense that you want more! Then Id lean in to start kissing and sucking on your pussy lips and clit. I'd begin to lightly trace your lips with my tongue and make my way to your clit. After a while I'd add more or less pressure with my tongue to increase the intensity, pulling you back in as you squirm away from pleasure. Light traces, circular motions, figure eights, and pauses for good measure. As your breathing grows heavier and heavier I feel your pussy begin to pulse and twitch, Id continue to roll and gyrate my tongue on your clit and wont stop until you beg me to. Occasionally I stop to kiss and bite your thighs and continue fingering you, curling my fingers and motioning precisely to hit your gspot every thrust while still focusing on eating you out...Your legs wrap around me and pull me in. Your heavy breathing and moans become ecstasy as your skin grows flush, your muscles tense, and your pussy begins to convulse. As you moan harder and harder I keep eating your pussy and licking your clit as you cum. This continues in waves and I keep going only getting more determined, letting you cum as many times as you liked. Finally when you've had enough I'd slowly lick up all of your cum and juices, enjoying the taste of you on my lips, as your pussy twitches against my tongue. on your writhing. Occasionally I'd stop to suck your cum off my fingers. Id continue to fuck Permalink Delete Report Block User Mark Unread Reply Reddit is amazing
Beard, Cum, and Head: [-] from /u
 sent 7 hours ago
 Id carry you to the bedroom and throw you on the bed. Then with you on top straddling me, I would run my hands
 through your hair and pull you close. We would make out until the tension grew too intense. Id flip you off and grab
 your wrists. With your arms pinned down above your head I start kissing your neck making my way down to your
 chest. I'd slowly roll your shirt off and then slide my hands up your back just light enough to cause you to shiver. After
 unclasping your bra and "briefly" ad miring your tits, I'd start squeezing them and playing with your nipples. Kissing
 and sucking your nipples while occasionally nibbling them all while listening to your breathing grow faster. After taking
 care of your tits I'd start kissing your chest slowly making my way down to your thighs, lightly running my lips and
 beard over your skin causing goose bumps to erupt the whole way down. When I knew you were ready Id rip off your
 pants to find a soaking wet spot marking where your pussy has been waiting. I'd slowly peel off your panties to reveal
 your glistening pussy aching to be eaten. Id slowly outline your pussy with my finger while occasionally rubbing your
 clit. Once I thought you were teased enough Id slowly slide a finger or two in your tight pussy, sliding in and out
 changing speed depending
 you harder and harder all the while your juices quickly and generously coating my fingers. Slowly stoppingi can sense
 that you want more! Then Id lean in to start kissing and sucking on your pussy lips and clit. I'd begin to lightly trace
 your lips with my tongue and make my way to your clit. After a while I'd add more or less pressure with my tongue to
 increase the intensity, pulling you back in as you squirm away from pleasure. Light traces, circular motions, figure
 eights, and pauses for good measure. As your breathing grows heavier and heavier I feel your pussy begin to pulse
 and twitch, Id continue to roll and gyrate my tongue on your clit and wont stop until you beg me to. Occasionally I
 stop to kiss and bite your thighs and continue fingering you, curling my fingers and motioning precisely to hit your
 gspot every thrust while still focusing on eating you out...Your legs wrap around me and pull me in. Your heavy
 breathing and moans become ecstasy as your skin grows flush, your muscles tense, and your pussy begins to
 convulse. As you moan harder and harder I keep eating your pussy and licking your clit as you cum. This continues in
 waves and I keep going only getting more determined, letting you cum as many times as you liked. Finally when
 you've had enough I'd slowly lick up all of your cum and juices, enjoying the taste of you on my lips, as your pussy
 twitches against my tongue.
 on your writhing. Occasionally I'd stop to suck your cum off my fingers. Id continue to fuck
 Permalink Delete Report Block User Mark Unread Reply
Reddit is amazing

Reddit is amazing

Avon, Bad, and Bitch: 12 hrs 12 hrs . PSA- I AM BEYOND FED UP. STOP INVITING ME TO THIS BULLSHIT Lolz I love you and this post #bossbabe If you invite me to your MLM group/party or if you invite me to join one, you're honestly stupid and know absolutely nothing about me. NO, I do not want to join/buy products or services from Arbonne, Young Living, Tibet River, Stella and Dot, Scentsy, WFG, Beachbody, Avon, Lularoe, Mary Kay, lip-sense, Jockey, It Works, Limelife by Alcone, doTerra, Herbalife, Monet etc. (I probably missed some but they're DEFINITELY included) i2 11h Like Reply MLM? Most good companies have paid sick time as well as bereavement pay. None of this is important to you? - And finally: yes you get own home but is it really worth it when you piss off everyone around you? So when you actually want to leave the "comfort of your own home" you won't have anyone to do anything with other than your fellow "boss babes". What happens when you no longer want to be part of the MLM and you have pushed away all your friends and family and no longer have anyone? work from the comfort of your Hahahaha love you to #bossbabe keep being you 11h Like Reply Are all the products shit? Absolutely not (Often their products aren't that bad, just grossly overprice). However when you get down to the core of it, their businesses and selling tactics are manipulative, predatory and shady. I refused to participate or promote in a company that literally sets you up to fail from the beginning. Write a reply... Honestly, if you want to unfriend me because of this, I don't care. Not only will it clean up my timeline from all the annoying posts you're required to post. But also I don't want to see any of that shit because it pisses me off EVERYTIME I see it so really, it will stop making me avoid social media (especially Facebook) like the plague. I've held this in too long and my friends are tired of hearing me bitch so I'm finally saying something. Reading this makes me a bit sad. I am so sorry this has been your experience!!! I'll be honest, being in the industry I can tell you why people have reached out to you...they have products that they genuinely love, and they think you would love, or they think you being a positive and wonderful person News flash: -you are not your own boss. can you set the price of products? Or make decisions regarding any other components of the actual running of the business? - 99% of people who join an MLM will lose money (there is research to back this up which I can provide the report for) - yes you make your own hours however what about job security? What if the company gets sued and is forced to shut down? What if you get sick and can no longer post to social media or work? Or retirement? Or your child gets sick and you need to spend time focused on that, not on your would benefit from the business *end rant* opportunity. Social Marketing isn't for everyone, and the industry isn't perfect, but really what industry is?! I cannot speak for other companies but I can speak for Arbonne so if you do every want to chat I hope everyone has a wonderful day MI M? Most anod comnanies have naid sick time as well as Write a comment... GIF privately always open This is pretty harsh unfortunate that this has been your experience because the industry has changed so much, but I think you could have worded this a little more kindly. Treat people how you want to be treated. If people have reached out to you it's because they see something really amazing in you so instead of getting annoyed try to switch your mindset around it, do your research on and it's really Awe. I am so sorry you feel this way about Network Marketing. Your thoughts and opinions are totally valid, I'm sure you're not the only one who feels this way! I'm in the industry and i myself get annoyed with invites/messages. I'm making every effort to change the stigma around MLM because it really can be a wonderful thing, when approached authentically. I can't speak for other companies but I can speak for IF YOU HAVE TO RECRUIT AND BUY PRODCUT the actual business model and take it as a LimeLife and what we stand for and compliment spamming people is against our policies. 2 2d Like Reply 9h Like Reply We're never gonna get anywhere if you keep bottling up your feelings your therapist thanks for your however I don't see how I was treating people badly? I would expect people to treat me the exact same way if I joined an MLM and started selling? So I mean... I am treating people the way I want to be opinions 8h Like Reply YOU ARE A CUSTOMER NOT A BUSINESS OWNER Imao she got sick of me coming in and ranting every time (those "friends" aka my therapist) treated???? 2h Like Reply Also I have done PLENTY of research on the business model. You think I Write a comment... GIF would speak on something publicly if I hadn't done research? Write a comment... GIF And the huns swarm.. 👀
Avon, Bad, and Bitch: 12 hrs
 12 hrs .
 PSA- I AM BEYOND FED UP. STOP INVITING ME TO THIS
 BULLSHIT
 Lolz I love you and this post #bossbabe
 If you invite me to your MLM group/party or if you invite me
 to join one, you're honestly stupid and know absolutely
 nothing about me. NO, I do not want to join/buy products or
 services from Arbonne, Young Living, Tibet River, Stella and
 Dot, Scentsy, WFG, Beachbody, Avon, Lularoe, Mary Kay,
 lip-sense, Jockey, It Works, Limelife by Alcone, doTerra,
 Herbalife, Monet etc. (I probably missed some but they're
 DEFINITELY included)
 i2
 11h Like
 Reply
 MLM? Most good companies have paid sick time as well as
 bereavement pay. None of this is important to you?
 - And finally: yes you get
 own home but is it really worth it when you piss off everyone
 around you? So when you actually want to leave the
 "comfort of your own home" you won't have anyone to do
 anything with other than your fellow "boss babes". What
 happens when you no longer want to be part of the MLM
 and you have pushed away all your friends and family and
 no longer have anyone?
 work from the comfort of your
 Hahahaha love you to
 #bossbabe keep being you
 11h Like
 Reply
 Are all the products shit? Absolutely not (Often their
 products aren't that bad, just grossly overprice). However
 when you get down to the core of it, their businesses and
 selling tactics are manipulative, predatory and shady. I
 refused to participate or promote in a company that literally
 sets you up to fail from the beginning.
 Write a reply...
 Honestly, if you want to unfriend me because of this, I don't
 care. Not only will it clean up my timeline from all the
 annoying posts you're required to post. But also I don't want
 to see any of that shit because it pisses me off EVERYTIME I
 see it so really, it will stop making me avoid social media
 (especially Facebook) like the plague. I've held this in too
 long and my friends are tired of hearing me bitch so I'm
 finally saying something.
 Reading this makes me a bit sad. I am so
 sorry this has been your experience!!! I'll be
 honest, being in the industry I can tell you
 why people have reached out to you...they
 have products that they genuinely love, and
 they think you would love, or they think you
 being a positive and wonderful person
 News flash:
 -you are not your own boss. can you set the price of
 products? Or make decisions regarding any other
 components of the actual running of the business?
 - 99% of people who join an MLM will lose money (there is
 research to back this up which I can provide the report for)
 - yes you make your own hours however what about job
 security? What if the company gets sued and is forced to
 shut down? What if you get sick and can no longer post to
 social media or work? Or retirement? Or your child gets sick
 and you need to spend time focused on that, not on your
 would benefit from the business
 *end rant*
 opportunity. Social Marketing isn't for
 everyone, and the industry isn't perfect, but
 really what industry is?! I cannot speak for
 other companies but I can speak for
 Arbonne so if you do every want to chat
 I hope everyone has a wonderful day
 MI M? Most anod comnanies have naid sick time as well as
 Write a comment...
 GIF
 privately
 always open
 This is pretty harsh
 unfortunate that this has been your
 experience because the industry has
 changed so much, but I think you could
 have worded this a little more kindly. Treat
 people how you want to be treated. If
 people have reached out to you it's because
 they see something really amazing in you so
 instead of getting annoyed try to switch
 your mindset around it, do your research on
 and it's really
 Awe. I am so sorry you feel this way about
 Network Marketing. Your thoughts and
 opinions are totally valid, I'm sure you're not
 the only one who feels this way! I'm in the
 industry and i myself get annoyed with
 invites/messages. I'm making every effort to
 change the stigma around MLM because it
 really can be a wonderful thing, when
 approached authentically. I can't speak for
 other companies but I can speak for
 IF YOU HAVE TO
 RECRUIT
 AND BUY PRODCUT
 the actual business model and take it as a
 LimeLife and what we stand for
 and
 compliment
 spamming people is against our policies.
 2
 2d Like Reply
 9h Like Reply
 We're never gonna get anywhere if you
 keep bottling up your feelings your
 therapist
 thanks for your
 however I don't see
 how I was treating people badly? I
 would expect people to treat me the
 exact same way if I joined an MLM and
 started selling? So I mean... I am
 treating people the way I want to be
 opinions
 8h Like Reply
 YOU ARE A CUSTOMER NOT
 A BUSINESS OWNER
 Imao she got sick of me
 coming in and ranting every time
 (those "friends" aka my therapist)
 treated????
 2h Like Reply
 Also I have done PLENTY of research
 on the business model. You think I
 Write a comment...
 GIF
 would speak on something publicly if I
 hadn't done research?
 Write a comment...
 GIF
And the huns swarm.. 👀

And the huns swarm.. 👀