Rapids
Rapids

Rapids

Spreaded
Spreaded

Spreaded

Directions
Directions

Directions

Directing
Directing

Directing

Hitted
Hitted

Hitted

hitting
hitting

hitting

self
self

self

potassium iodide
 potassium iodide

potassium iodide

stillness
 stillness

stillness

injured
 injured

injured

🔥 | Latest

direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

direct hit: YOUR TEAM (YOU) - Above average player xPwndxUxx Only plays Hanzo no matterMassive weeaboo, plays with Will yell at team for not NarutoBoi96 what the situation Japanese voices on Tries to play - Will adjust hero picks based enemy team composition the objective on picking heroes that suit their has a myanimelist profile that he regularly updates owns a large katana collection corners, cannot actually aim when nearing an objective breathes heavily over his open worships Seagull GamurPrincess is not actually a girl but a fat DankKush Only plays while high It's only a game man xD the sound of a bong rip xgmzmxt las exclusively Torbjorn builds turret and then afks behind it occasionally hitting it with his hammer is probably a bot -Only heals Genji and will fly to only voice communication is him even to her death Holds ult all game trying to get always ice walls teammates in PotG, uses it once to solo rez spawn -100% of playtime is on Mercy -constantly blocks your ults excessive use of emoticons with wall and then types "xD in chat THE OTHER TEAM DJProfessorK Hanguk Mauer Avid Jet Set Radio player has probably not touched the WoW raid leader -17 year old Korean on a near lethal dose of Adderall Takes it personally when you is physically nailed to the perfect callouts to his team has been playing FPS since he could sit up straight attack his healer objective, always has ult up the entire game ground since leaving spawn is literally unhittable objective time is the same as the locked into a PC bang until he total game time wins Blizzcon God USMCDad Blyat Former Quake and TF2 pro holds PhD in pure mathematics Navy Seal copypasta is the actual guy from the flexes between support and tank, always picks the most useful hero for the job with a speciality in geometry no difference in aim between 80% direct hit ratio Nowhere is safe, not even when he ults and is regularly shooting your spawn 100% charge -Огонь по готовности This is so true it hurts
direct hit: YOUR TEAM
 (YOU)
 - Above average player
 xPwndxUxx
 Only plays Hanzo no matterMassive weeaboo, plays with
 Will yell at team for not
 NarutoBoi96
 what the situation
 Japanese voices on
 Tries to play
 - Will adjust hero picks based
 enemy team composition
 the objective
 on picking heroes that suit their
 has a myanimelist profile
 that he regularly updates
 owns a large katana collection
 corners, cannot actually aim
 when nearing an objective
 breathes heavily over his open
 worships Seagull
 GamurPrincess
 is not actually a girl but a fat
 DankKush
 Only plays while high
 It's only a game man xD
 the sound of a bong rip
 xgmzmxt
 las exclusively Torbjorn
 builds turret and then afks
 behind it occasionally hitting it
 with his hammer
 is probably a bot
 -Only heals Genji and will fly to only voice communication is
 him even to her death
 Holds ult all game trying to get always ice walls teammates in
 PotG, uses it once to solo rez spawn
 -100% of playtime is on Mercy
 -constantly blocks your ults
 excessive use of emoticons with wall and then types "xD
 in chat
 THE OTHER TEAM
 DJProfessorK
 Hanguk
 Mauer
 Avid Jet Set Radio player
 has probably not touched the
 WoW raid leader
 -17 year old Korean on a
 near lethal dose of Adderall
 Takes it personally when you
 is physically nailed to the
 perfect callouts to his team
 has been playing FPS since he
 could sit up straight
 attack his healer
 objective, always has ult up
 the entire game
 ground since leaving spawn
 is literally unhittable
 objective time is the same as the locked into a PC bang until he
 total game time
 wins Blizzcon
 God
 USMCDad
 Blyat
 Former Quake and TF2 pro
 holds PhD in pure mathematics Navy Seal copypasta
 is the actual guy from the
 flexes between support
 and tank, always picks the
 most useful hero for the
 job
 with a speciality in geometry
 no difference in aim between
 80% direct hit ratio
 Nowhere is safe, not even
 when he ults and is regularly
 shooting
 your spawn
 100% charge
 -Огонь по готовности
This is so true it hurts

This is so true it hurts

direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix The professor told his class oneday: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair offwith the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, oneofyou will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph andthen add another para graph to the storyand send it back, also sending an other copy to me. The first person will then add athird paragraph, and soon back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must bewritten inthe e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary. THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question. (second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think aboutthan the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a holethrough his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he feltone last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace- ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocenceto become a woman?" she pondered wistfully. (Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor offthe coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. lrefuse tocontinuethis mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi literate adolescent. (Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing arethe literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" (Rebecca) Asshole. (Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F**K YOU YOU NEANDERTHAL!! (Gary) In your dreams, Ho. Go drink sometea. TEACHER) A+ I really liked this one. A+. I really liked this one.
direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix
 The professor told his class oneday: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair offwith the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, oneofyou will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph andthen add another para
 graph to the storyand send it back, also sending an
 other copy to me. The first person will then add athird
 paragraph, and soon back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must bewritten inthe e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."

 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary.
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the question.

 (second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think aboutthan the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. "Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a holethrough
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.

 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he feltone last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace-
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocenceto become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully.

 (Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 entire planet.
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor offthe coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.

 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. lrefuse tocontinuethis mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi literate adolescent.
 (Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing arethe
 literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"

 (Rebecca)
 Asshole.
 (Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F**K YOU YOU NEANDERTHAL!!
 (Gary)
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink sometea.
 TEACHER)
 A+ I really liked this one.
A+. I really liked this one.

A+. I really liked this one.

direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day:Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of (second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far.." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace- ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel, Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully (Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the entire With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Arsehole. (Gary) B'tch. F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI! Gary) In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. (TEACHER) A+ I really liked this one. I wish I had a teacher like him
direct hit: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day:Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 (second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. "Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far.." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace-
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel, Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 (Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 entire
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Arsehole.
 (Gary)
 B'tch.
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI!
 Gary)
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 (TEACHER)
 A+
 I really liked this one.
I wish I had a teacher like him

I wish I had a teacher like him

direct hit: RIOT FEST AND CARNIVAL E2CHICAGO, ) ILLINOIS DOUGLAS PARK 11-13 019 RIOTFEST.ORG R TICKETFLY.COM FRIDAY, SEPTEMB R 11 NO DOUBT FAITH NO MORE MOTORHEAD ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTS TT M ALKALINE TRIO COHEED AND CAMBRIA FLOGGING MOLLY SLIGHTLY STOOPID THRICE DIRTY HEADS ANTHRAX EAGLES OF DEATH METAL AGAINST ME! BAYSIDE MEST ATREYU LEE SCRATCH PERRY THE EXPENDABLES LIVING COLOUR FISHBONE DEATH MARIACHI EL BRONX EVERY TIME IDIE REAL FRIENDS 88 FINGERS LOUIE MUSTARD PLUG INTO IT OVERIT POST MALONE WITH FKI CHEF SPECIAL BARB WIRE DOLLS THE COATHANGERS PRAYERS SPEEDY ORTIZ WHITE MYSTERY GROUND UP SKINNY LISTER DIRTY FENCES ALEX WILEY HEEMS PSALM ONE DREAMERS FAULKNER ELLZAPOPPINCRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 12 RANCID PERFORMING AND OUT COME THE WOLVES BILLY IDOL TAKING BACK SUNDAY SYSTEM OF A DOWN IGGY POP DRIVE LIKE JEHU MERLE HAGGARD ALEXISONFIRE THE ACADEMY IS... PERORMING ALMOS THE LAWRENCE ARMS ECHO& THE BUNNYMEN BOOTSY COLLINS RUBBER BAND THE DAMNED PENNYWISE DESAPARECIDOS THE JOY FORMIDABLE THE DEAD MILKMEN THE THURSTON MOORE BAND FIDLAR MILLENCOLIN AMERICAN NIGHTMARE SWERVEDRIVER GWAR LIFETIME JOYCE MANOR CIV THE MOVIELIFE STEVE IGNORANT AND PARANOID VISIONS THE DEAR HUNTER THE ATARISATS EXT ours MODERN LIFE IS WAR PERFORMING WITNESS FIT FOR RIVALS FLATFOOT 56 TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET CHON COUNTERPUNCH DIRECT HIT! SLEEP ONIT THE BROKEDOWNS MEAT WAVE ELWAY INDIAN HANDCRAFTS PEARS CLOWNS DIE SELLOUTZ HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA MAYDAY PARADE BABES IN TOYLAND SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 13 MODEST MOUSE THE PRODIGY SNOOP DOGG PERFORMING DOGCYSTYLE DAMIAN JR.GONG MARLEY TENACIOUS D RODRIGOY GABRIELA L7 STEPHEN "RAGGA" MARLEY KONGOS CYPRESS HILL YELAWOLF THE AIRBORNE TOXIC EVENT MANCHESTER ORCHESTRA DE LA SOUL ANDREW MCMAHON IN THE WILDERNESS NEW POLITICS JIMMY CLIFF ANDREW W.K LESS THAN JAKE MORGAN HERITAGE DOOMTREE HUM TARRUS RILEY THE DWARVES CUTS&PUSSY TOMMY STINSON KEVIN DEVINE JO MERSA ALVVAYS THE WHITE BUFFALO BLACK-AM-I SKIP MARLEY KNUCKLE PUCK JAZZ CARTIER HAVE MERCY SUPERHEAVEN FOXING BEACH SLANG CAYETANA BLIS NORTHERN FACES SOUVENIRS SKATING POLLY SIGNALS MIDWEST MODERN CHEMISTRY TASHA THE AMAZON FOXTROTT TWIN RIVER INDIAN SCHOOL THE MUNICIPAL DRAINAGE PROJECT HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE RIOT FEST 2013 LIMITED TICKETS AVAILABLE 107 lost fm System of a Down headlines @Riot_fest tomorrow at 8:45pm. Get tix now: http:-bit.ly-1M1ZatS RIOTFEST systemofadown
direct hit: RIOT FEST
 AND CARNIVAL
 E2CHICAGO,
 ) ILLINOIS
 DOUGLAS PARK
 11-13
 019
 RIOTFEST.ORG R TICKETFLY.COM
 FRIDAY, SEPTEMB R 11
 NO DOUBT FAITH NO MORE MOTORHEAD ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTS TT M
 ALKALINE TRIO
 COHEED AND CAMBRIA FLOGGING MOLLY SLIGHTLY STOOPID THRICE DIRTY HEADS ANTHRAX
 EAGLES OF DEATH METAL AGAINST ME! BAYSIDE MEST ATREYU LEE SCRATCH PERRY THE EXPENDABLES
 LIVING COLOUR FISHBONE DEATH MARIACHI EL BRONX EVERY TIME IDIE REAL FRIENDS 88 FINGERS LOUIE
 MUSTARD PLUG INTO IT OVERIT POST MALONE WITH FKI CHEF SPECIAL BARB WIRE DOLLS
 THE COATHANGERS PRAYERS SPEEDY ORTIZ WHITE MYSTERY GROUND UP SKINNY LISTER
 DIRTY FENCES ALEX WILEY HEEMS PSALM ONE DREAMERS FAULKNER ELLZAPOPPINCRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 12
 RANCID PERFORMING AND OUT COME THE WOLVES BILLY IDOL TAKING BACK SUNDAY
 SYSTEM OF A DOWN
 IGGY POP
 DRIVE LIKE JEHU MERLE HAGGARD ALEXISONFIRE THE ACADEMY IS... PERORMING ALMOS
 THE LAWRENCE ARMS ECHO& THE BUNNYMEN BOOTSY COLLINS RUBBER BAND THE DAMNED PENNYWISE
 DESAPARECIDOS THE JOY FORMIDABLE THE DEAD MILKMEN
 THE THURSTON MOORE BAND FIDLAR MILLENCOLIN AMERICAN NIGHTMARE SWERVEDRIVER GWAR LIFETIME JOYCE MANOR
 CIV THE MOVIELIFE STEVE IGNORANT AND PARANOID VISIONS THE DEAR HUNTER THE ATARISATS EXT ours
 MODERN LIFE IS WAR PERFORMING WITNESS FIT FOR RIVALS FLATFOOT 56 TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET CHON COUNTERPUNCH
 DIRECT HIT! SLEEP ONIT THE BROKEDOWNS MEAT WAVE ELWAY INDIAN HANDCRAFTS PEARS CLOWNS
 DIE SELLOUTZ HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA MAYDAY PARADE BABES IN TOYLAND
 SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 13
 MODEST MOUSE THE PRODIGY SNOOP DOGG PERFORMING DOGCYSTYLE DAMIAN JR.GONG MARLEY TENACIOUS D
 RODRIGOY GABRIELA L7 STEPHEN "RAGGA" MARLEY KONGOS CYPRESS HILL YELAWOLF
 THE AIRBORNE TOXIC EVENT MANCHESTER ORCHESTRA DE LA SOUL ANDREW MCMAHON IN THE WILDERNESS NEW POLITICS
 JIMMY CLIFF ANDREW W.K LESS THAN JAKE MORGAN HERITAGE DOOMTREE HUM TARRUS RILEY
 THE DWARVES CUTS&PUSSY TOMMY STINSON KEVIN DEVINE JO MERSA ALVVAYS THE WHITE BUFFALO BLACK-AM-I
 SKIP MARLEY KNUCKLE PUCK JAZZ CARTIER HAVE MERCY SUPERHEAVEN FOXING BEACH SLANG CAYETANA BLIS
 NORTHERN FACES SOUVENIRS SKATING POLLY SIGNALS MIDWEST MODERN CHEMISTRY TASHA THE AMAZON FOXTROTT
 TWIN RIVER INDIAN SCHOOL THE MUNICIPAL DRAINAGE PROJECT HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 RIOT FEST 2013
 LIMITED
 TICKETS
 AVAILABLE
 107
 lost fm
System of a Down headlines @Riot_fest tomorrow at 8:45pm. Get tix now: http:-bit.ly-1M1ZatS RIOTFEST systemofadown

System of a Down headlines @Riot_fest tomorrow at 8:45pm. Get tix now: http:-bit.ly-1M1ZatS RIOTFEST systemofadown

direct hit: RIOT FEST AND CARNIVAL n Scenic DOUGLAS PARK BCHICAGO ILLINOIS 11-13 01 RIOTFEST.ORG の TICKETFLY.COM OR FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 11 NO DOUBT FAITH NO MORE MOTÖRHEAD ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTSSRUTTACOMPTON RX ALKALINE TRIO COHEED ANDCAMBRIA FLOGGING MOLLY SLIGHTLY STOOPID THRICE DIRTY HEADS ANTHRAX EAGLES OF DEATH METAL AGAINST ME! BAYSIDE MEST ATREYU LEE SCRATCH PERRY THE EXPENDABLES LIVING COLOUR FISHBONE DEATH MARIACHIEL BRONX CIV EVERY TIME I DIE REAL FRIENDS 88 FINGERS LOUIE MUSTARD PLUG INTO IT. OVER IT. POST MALONE WITH FKI CHEFSPECIAL MARMOZETS BARB WIRE DOLLS THE COATHANGERS PRAYERS SPEEDY ORTIZ WHITE MYSTERY MAIN ATTRAKIONZ GROUND UP SKINNY LISTER ALEX WILEY HEEMS PSALM ONE DREAMERS FAULKNER HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 12 SYSTEM OF A DOWN IGGY POP RANCID PERFORMING AND OUT COME THE WOLVES BILLY IDOL TAKING BACK SUNDAY OST HERE THE LAWRENCE ARMS ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN BOOTSY COLLINS RUBBER BAND THE DAMNED PENNYWISE THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA MAYDAY PARADE BABES IN TOYLAND DESAPARECIDOS THE JOY FORMIDABLE THE DEAD MILKMEN FIDLAR MILLENCOLIN AMERICAN NIGHTMARE SWERVEDRIVER GWAR LIFETIME JOYCE MANOR RODRIGO Y GABRIELA DRIVE LIKE JEHU MERLE HAGGARD ALEXISONFIRE THE ACADEMY IS... PERFORMI THE MOVIELIFE STEVE IGNORANT AND PARANOID VISIONS THE DEAR HUNTER THE ATARIS RATRE2x MODERN LIFE IS WAR PERFORMING WITNESS FIT FOR RIVALS FLATFOOT 56 TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET CHON COUNTERPUNCH DIRECT HIT! DIRTY FENCES SLEEP ON IT THE BROKEDOWNS MEAT WAVE ELWAY INDIAN HANDCRAFTS PEARS GATEWAY DRUGS CLOWNS DIE SELLOUTZ THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 13 MODEST MOUSE THE PRODIGY SNOOP DOGG PERFORMING DOGCYSTYLu DAMIAN "JR. GONG" MARLEY TENACIOUS D L7 STEPHEN "RAGGA" MARLEY KONGOS CYPRESS HILL YELAWOLF THE AIRBORNE TOXIC EVENT MANCHESTER ORCHESTRA DE LA SOUL ANDREW MCMAHON IN THE WILDERNESS NEW POLITICS JIMMY CLIFF NDREW W.K. LESS THAN JAKE THE THURSTON MOORE BAND MORGAN HERITAGE DOOMTREE HUM TARRUS RILEY THE DWARVES0 CUTS& PUSSY TOMMY STINSON KEVIN DEVINE JO MERSA ALVVAYS THE WHITE BUFFALO BLACK-AM- SKIP MARLEY KNUCKLE PUCK JAZZ CARTIER HAVE MERCY SUPERHEAVEN FOXING BEACH SLANG CAYETANA BLIS NORTHERN TWIN RIVER INDIANSCHOOL THEMUNICIPAL DRAINAGE PROJECT HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE ES SOUVENIRS SKATING POLLY SIGNALS MIDWEST MODERN CHEMISTRY TASHA THE AMAZON FOXTROTT SINGLE & MULTI-DAY TICKETS RIOT FEST 2 NOW AVAILABLE! 10! en, 'ennent-V rdia 9傘ー1REx-cound lyR-a., @READER ie moRT田 SIONGBOW REX-GOLIATH Autrst System Of A Down​ is headlining @RiotFest in Chicago on 9-12. Single day tickets on sale now: http:-goo.gl-UACuxQ systemofadown
direct hit: RIOT FEST
 AND CARNIVAL
 n Scenic
 DOUGLAS PARK
 BCHICAGO
 ILLINOIS
 11-13
 01
 RIOTFEST.ORG
 の TICKETFLY.COM
 OR
 FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 11
 NO DOUBT FAITH NO MORE MOTÖRHEAD ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTSSRUTTACOMPTON RX ALKALINE TRIO
 COHEED ANDCAMBRIA FLOGGING MOLLY SLIGHTLY STOOPID THRICE DIRTY HEADS ANTHRAX
 EAGLES OF DEATH METAL AGAINST ME! BAYSIDE MEST ATREYU LEE SCRATCH PERRY THE EXPENDABLES
 LIVING COLOUR FISHBONE DEATH MARIACHIEL BRONX CIV EVERY TIME I DIE REAL FRIENDS 88 FINGERS LOUIE
 MUSTARD PLUG INTO IT. OVER IT. POST MALONE WITH FKI CHEFSPECIAL MARMOZETS BARB WIRE DOLLS
 THE COATHANGERS PRAYERS SPEEDY ORTIZ WHITE MYSTERY MAIN ATTRAKIONZ GROUND UP SKINNY LISTER
 ALEX WILEY HEEMS PSALM ONE DREAMERS FAULKNER HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 12
 SYSTEM OF A DOWN IGGY POP RANCID PERFORMING AND OUT COME THE WOLVES BILLY IDOL TAKING BACK SUNDAY
 OST HERE
 THE LAWRENCE ARMS ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN BOOTSY COLLINS RUBBER BAND THE DAMNED PENNYWISE
 THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA MAYDAY PARADE BABES IN TOYLAND DESAPARECIDOS THE JOY FORMIDABLE
 THE DEAD MILKMEN FIDLAR MILLENCOLIN AMERICAN NIGHTMARE SWERVEDRIVER GWAR LIFETIME JOYCE MANOR
 RODRIGO Y GABRIELA
 DRIVE LIKE JEHU
 MERLE HAGGARD
 ALEXISONFIRE
 THE ACADEMY IS... PERFORMI
 THE MOVIELIFE STEVE IGNORANT AND PARANOID VISIONS THE DEAR HUNTER THE ATARIS
 RATRE2x
 MODERN LIFE IS WAR PERFORMING WITNESS FIT FOR RIVALS FLATFOOT 56 TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET CHON COUNTERPUNCH
 DIRECT HIT! DIRTY FENCES SLEEP ON IT THE BROKEDOWNS MEAT WAVE ELWAY INDIAN HANDCRAFTS PEARS
 GATEWAY DRUGS CLOWNS DIE SELLOUTZ THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 13
 MODEST MOUSE THE PRODIGY SNOOP DOGG PERFORMING DOGCYSTYLu DAMIAN "JR. GONG" MARLEY TENACIOUS D
 L7 STEPHEN "RAGGA" MARLEY KONGOS CYPRESS HILL YELAWOLF THE AIRBORNE TOXIC EVENT
 MANCHESTER ORCHESTRA DE LA SOUL ANDREW MCMAHON IN THE WILDERNESS NEW POLITICS JIMMY CLIFF
 NDREW W.K. LESS THAN JAKE THE THURSTON MOORE BAND MORGAN HERITAGE DOOMTREE HUM TARRUS RILEY
 THE DWARVES0 CUTS& PUSSY TOMMY STINSON KEVIN DEVINE JO MERSA ALVVAYS THE WHITE BUFFALO BLACK-AM-
 SKIP MARLEY KNUCKLE PUCK JAZZ CARTIER HAVE MERCY SUPERHEAVEN FOXING BEACH SLANG CAYETANA BLIS
 NORTHERN
 TWIN RIVER INDIANSCHOOL THEMUNICIPAL DRAINAGE PROJECT HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 ES SOUVENIRS SKATING POLLY SIGNALS MIDWEST MODERN CHEMISTRY TASHA THE AMAZON FOXTROTT
 SINGLE &
 MULTI-DAY
 TICKETS
 RIOT FEST 2
 NOW
 AVAILABLE!
 10!
 en, 'ennent-V rdia 9傘ー1REx-cound
 lyR-a., @READER ie moRT田
 SIONGBOW REX-GOLIATH
 Autrst
System Of A Down​ is headlining @RiotFest in Chicago on 9-12. Single day tickets on sale now: http:-goo.gl-UACuxQ systemofadown

System Of A Down​ is headlining @RiotFest in Chicago on 9-12. Single day tickets on sale now: http:-goo.gl-UACuxQ systemofadown

direct hit: RIOT FEST DENVER,/ COLORADO COMPLEX RIOTFEST.ORG OR TICKETFLY.CO AND RODEO FRIDAY AUGUST 28 SYSTEM OF A DOWN IGGY POP ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTSPESPORMINC STRANCHT OUTTA COMPTORMX MOTÖRHEAD COHEED AND CAMBRIA CYPRESS HILL THE AIRBORNE TOXICEVENT ANTHRAX DEATH GRIPS TESTAMENT GWAR THE BLACK LIPS AMERICAN NIGHTMARE THE GET UP KIDS DOOMTREE 88 FINGERS LOUIE BENJAMIN BOOKER CHEF'SPECIAL SPEEDY ORTIZ CAYETANA PRAYERS THE HOTELIER DREAMERS MAIN ATTRAKIONZ INPUT &BROKEN INDIAN SCHOOL THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE SATURDAY. AUCUST 29 MODEST MOUS PIXIES RUN DMC RANCID PERFORMING. AND OUTCOME THE wOLVES DRIVE LIKE JEHU KONGOS ALKALINE TRIO THRICE COLD WAR KIDS IRATION THE DAMNED EAGLES OF DEATH METAL THE MIGHTY MIGHTY BOSSTONES DESAPARECIDOS THE DEAD MILKMEN THE VANDALS LESS THAN JAKE THE JOY FORMIDABLE CLOUD CULT BAYSIDE SWERVEDRIVER JOYCE MANOR THE BUNNY GANG FIT FOR RIVALS DIRECT HIT! BROADWAY CALLS NORTHERN FACES MEAT WAVE GATEWAY DRUGS SOUVENIRS PEARS SLEEP ON IT THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION-HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE SUNDAY, AUGUST 30 THE PRODIGY SNOOP DOGG PERFORMING DOGGYSTYLE TENACIOUS D FLOGGING MOLLY L7 EXPLOSIONS IN THE SKY BOOTSY COLLINS, RUBBER BAND YELAWOLF BABES IN TOYLAND GZA PERFORMING LIQUID SWORDS DE LA SOUL THE LAWRENCE ARMS NADA SURF REVEREND HORTON HEAT ANDREW:W.K. MILLENCOLIN,乙SECONDS OFF! THE WHITE BUFFALO POST MALONE WITH FKL AZZ CARTIER TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET PUP BEACH SLANG THE MOTH & THE FLAME ELWAY WHITE MYSTERY SKATING POLLY ROZWELL KID FAULKNER DAYE JACK THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE SODA JERK PRESENTS oa UBER Westword System Of A Down is headlining @riot_fest in Denver on 8-28. Single day tickets on sale now at riotfest.org-denver-tickets systemofadown riotfest
direct hit: RIOT FEST
 DENVER,/
 COLORADO
 COMPLEX
 RIOTFEST.ORG OR TICKETFLY.CO
 AND RODEO
 FRIDAY AUGUST 28
 SYSTEM OF A DOWN IGGY POP ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTSPESPORMINC STRANCHT OUTTA COMPTORMX MOTÖRHEAD
 COHEED AND CAMBRIA CYPRESS HILL THE AIRBORNE TOXICEVENT ANTHRAX DEATH GRIPS
 TESTAMENT GWAR THE BLACK LIPS AMERICAN NIGHTMARE THE GET UP KIDS DOOMTREE
 88 FINGERS LOUIE BENJAMIN BOOKER CHEF'SPECIAL SPEEDY ORTIZ CAYETANA
 PRAYERS THE HOTELIER DREAMERS MAIN ATTRAKIONZ INPUT &BROKEN
 INDIAN SCHOOL THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 SATURDAY. AUCUST 29
 MODEST MOUS PIXIES RUN DMC RANCID PERFORMING. AND OUTCOME THE wOLVES
 DRIVE LIKE JEHU KONGOS ALKALINE TRIO THRICE COLD WAR KIDS IRATION THE DAMNED
 EAGLES OF DEATH METAL THE MIGHTY MIGHTY BOSSTONES DESAPARECIDOS
 THE DEAD MILKMEN THE VANDALS LESS THAN JAKE THE JOY FORMIDABLE CLOUD CULT
 BAYSIDE SWERVEDRIVER JOYCE MANOR THE BUNNY GANG FIT FOR RIVALS DIRECT HIT!
 BROADWAY CALLS NORTHERN FACES MEAT WAVE GATEWAY DRUGS SOUVENIRS
 PEARS SLEEP ON IT THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION-HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 SUNDAY, AUGUST 30
 THE PRODIGY SNOOP DOGG PERFORMING DOGGYSTYLE TENACIOUS D FLOGGING MOLLY
 L7 EXPLOSIONS IN THE SKY BOOTSY COLLINS, RUBBER BAND YELAWOLF
 BABES IN TOYLAND GZA PERFORMING LIQUID SWORDS DE LA SOUL THE LAWRENCE ARMS
 NADA SURF REVEREND HORTON HEAT ANDREW:W.K. MILLENCOLIN,乙SECONDS OFF!
 THE WHITE BUFFALO POST MALONE WITH FKL AZZ CARTIER TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET PUP
 BEACH SLANG THE MOTH & THE FLAME ELWAY WHITE MYSTERY SKATING POLLY ROZWELL KID
 FAULKNER DAYE JACK THE ROCK-AFIRE EXPLOSION HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW REVUE
 SODA JERK
 PRESENTS
 oa UBER
 Westword
System Of A Down is headlining @riot_fest in Denver on 8-28. Single day tickets on sale now at riotfest.org-denver-tickets systemofadown riotfest

System Of A Down is headlining @riot_fest in Denver on 8-28. Single day tickets on sale now at riotfest.org-denver-tickets systemofadown...

direct hit: DCARNIVA 11-13 RIOTFEST.ORG OR TICKETFLY.COM LAS PARK 2015 NODOUBT SYSTEM OF A DOWN MODEST MOUSE FAITH NO MORE THEPRODIGY IGGY POP SNOOP DOGG DAMIAN "JR. GONG" MARLEY MOTORHEAD RANCID TENACIOUSD BILLY IDOL ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTS ALKALINE TRIO COHEED AND CAMBRIA TAKING BACK SUNDAY RODRIGO Y GABRIELA DRIVE LIKE JEHU MERLE HAGGARD FLOGGING MOLLY SLIGHTLY STOOPID L7 ALEXISONFIRE THRICE DIRTY HEADS STEPHEN "RAGGA" MARLEY THE ACADEMY IS.... THE LAWRENCE ARMS KONGOS CYPRESS HILL ANTRHAX ECHO& THE BUNNYMEN BOOTSY COLLINS RUBBER BAND THE DAMNED YELAWOLF PENNYWISE THE AIRBORNE TOXIC EVENT MANCHESTER ORCHESTRA EAGLES OF DEATH METAL THE DEVIL WEARSPRADA DELASOUL ANDREW MCMAHON IN THE WILDERNESS MAYDAY PARADE NEW POLITICS JIMMY CLIFF AGAINST ME! BABES IN TOYLAND OK GO BAYSIDE MEST ANDREW W.K. DESAPARECIDOS THE JOY FORMIDABLE THE DEAD MILKMEN ATREYU FIDLAR MILLENCOLIN AMERICAN NIGHTMARE SWERVEDRIVER LEE SCRATCH PERRY GWAR LESS THAN JAKE THE EXPENDABLES LIVING COLOUR THE THURSTON MOORE BAND MORGAN HERITAGE LIFETIME FISHBONE DEATH DOOMTREE HUM-TARRUS RILEY MARIACHI EL BRONX CIV JOYCE MANOR EVERY TIME I DIE THE MOVIELIFE THE DWARVES TOMMY STINSON STEVEIGNORANT&PARANOID VISIONS REAL FRIENDS THE DEAR HUNTER KEVIN DEVINE 88 FINGERS LOUIE MUSTARD PLUG THE ATARIS JO MERSA INTO IT.OVERIT. ALVVAYS THE WHITE BUFFALO BLACK-AM-I SKIP MARLEY KNUCKLE PUCK POST MALONE WITH FKI JAZZ CARTIER CHEFSPECIAL MARMOZETS MODERN LIFE IS WAR FIT FOR RIVALS BARB WIRE DOLLS THE COATHANGERS FLATFOOT 56 TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET PRAYERS CHON COUNTERPUNCH HAVE HERCY SPEEDY ORTIZ SUPERHEAVEN WHITE MYSTERY FOXING DIRECT HIT! MAIN ATTRAKIONZ GROUND UP SKINNY LISTER BEACH SLANG CAYETANA ALEX WILEY HEEMS DIRTY FENCES BLIS SLEEP ONIT THE BROKEDOWNS MEAT WAVE PSALH ONE NORTHERN FACES DREAMERS SOUVENIRS ELWAY INDIAN HANDCRAFTS -SKATING POLLY SIGNALS MIDWEST MODERN CHEMISTRY FAULKNER PEARS GATEWAY DRUGS TASHA THE AHAZON FOXTROTT TWIN RIVER CLOWNS INDIAN SCHOOL DIE SELLOUTZ THE MUNICIPAL DRAINAGE PROJECT SystemOfADown will be headlining @riotfest in Chicago this September. Tickets on sale now at systemofadown.com.
direct hit: DCARNIVA
 11-13
 RIOTFEST.ORG OR TICKETFLY.COM
 LAS PARK
 2015
 NODOUBT SYSTEM OF A DOWN MODEST MOUSE FAITH NO MORE THEPRODIGY IGGY POP SNOOP DOGG
 DAMIAN "JR. GONG" MARLEY MOTORHEAD RANCID TENACIOUSD BILLY IDOL
 ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTS ALKALINE TRIO COHEED AND CAMBRIA TAKING BACK SUNDAY
 RODRIGO Y GABRIELA DRIVE LIKE JEHU MERLE HAGGARD FLOGGING MOLLY
 SLIGHTLY STOOPID L7 ALEXISONFIRE THRICE DIRTY HEADS STEPHEN "RAGGA" MARLEY
 THE ACADEMY IS.... THE LAWRENCE ARMS KONGOS CYPRESS HILL ANTRHAX
 ECHO& THE BUNNYMEN BOOTSY COLLINS RUBBER BAND THE DAMNED YELAWOLF PENNYWISE
 THE AIRBORNE TOXIC EVENT MANCHESTER ORCHESTRA EAGLES OF DEATH METAL THE DEVIL WEARSPRADA DELASOUL
 ANDREW MCMAHON IN THE WILDERNESS MAYDAY PARADE NEW POLITICS JIMMY CLIFF AGAINST ME!
 BABES IN TOYLAND OK GO BAYSIDE MEST ANDREW W.K. DESAPARECIDOS
 THE JOY FORMIDABLE THE DEAD MILKMEN ATREYU FIDLAR MILLENCOLIN AMERICAN NIGHTMARE
 SWERVEDRIVER LEE SCRATCH PERRY GWAR LESS THAN JAKE THE EXPENDABLES
 LIVING COLOUR THE THURSTON MOORE BAND MORGAN HERITAGE LIFETIME
 FISHBONE DEATH DOOMTREE HUM-TARRUS RILEY MARIACHI EL BRONX
 CIV JOYCE MANOR EVERY TIME I DIE THE MOVIELIFE THE DWARVES TOMMY STINSON
 STEVEIGNORANT&PARANOID VISIONS
 REAL FRIENDS
 THE DEAR HUNTER
 KEVIN DEVINE
 88 FINGERS LOUIE
 MUSTARD PLUG THE ATARIS JO MERSA INTO IT.OVERIT. ALVVAYS THE WHITE BUFFALO BLACK-AM-I
 SKIP MARLEY KNUCKLE PUCK POST MALONE WITH FKI JAZZ CARTIER CHEFSPECIAL MARMOZETS
 MODERN LIFE IS WAR FIT FOR RIVALS BARB WIRE DOLLS THE COATHANGERS FLATFOOT 56 TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET
 PRAYERS CHON COUNTERPUNCH HAVE HERCY SPEEDY ORTIZ SUPERHEAVEN WHITE MYSTERY FOXING DIRECT HIT!
 MAIN ATTRAKIONZ GROUND UP SKINNY LISTER BEACH SLANG CAYETANA ALEX WILEY HEEMS DIRTY FENCES
 BLIS SLEEP ONIT THE BROKEDOWNS MEAT WAVE PSALH ONE NORTHERN FACES DREAMERS SOUVENIRS ELWAY
 INDIAN HANDCRAFTS -SKATING POLLY SIGNALS MIDWEST MODERN CHEMISTRY FAULKNER PEARS
 GATEWAY DRUGS TASHA THE AHAZON FOXTROTT TWIN RIVER CLOWNS INDIAN SCHOOL
 DIE SELLOUTZ THE MUNICIPAL DRAINAGE PROJECT
SystemOfADown will be headlining @riotfest in Chicago this September. Tickets on sale now at systemofadown.com.

SystemOfADown will be headlining @riotfest in Chicago this September. Tickets on sale now at systemofadown.com.

direct hit: OT FEST END ROD AUGUS DENVER, COLORADO NATIONAL WESTERN COMPLEX 2015 RIOTFEST.ORG OR TICKETFLY.COM SYSTEM OFADOWN MODEST MOUSE THE PRODIGY PIXIES SNOOP DOGG IGGY POP TENACIOUS D ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTS RUN DMC RANCID MOTORHEAD. FLOGGING MOLLY COHEED ANDCAMBRIA DRIVELIKE JEHU L7 EXPLOSIONSIN THESKY KONGOS CYPRESS HILL ALKALINE TRIO THRICE COLD WAR KIDS THE AIRBORNE TOXICEVENT ANTHRAX IRATION BOOTSY COLLINS' RUBBER BAND YELAWOLF BABES IN TOYLAND DEATH GRIPS THE DAMNED EAGLESOF DEATH METAL THEMIGHTY MIGHTY BOSSTONES GZA OK GO DE LA SOUL TESTAMENT DESAPARECIDOS THE DEAD MILKMEN NADA SURF THE LAWRENCE ARMS REVEREND HORTON HEAT ANDREW W.K. GWAR THE BLACK LIPS THE GET UP KIDS AMERICAN NIGHTMARE BAYSIDE SWERVEDRIVER MILLENCOLIN THE VANDALS LESS THAN JAKE THE JOY FORMIDABLE DOOMTREE CLOUD CULT 7 SECONDS. OFF! BENJAMIN BOOKER JOYCEMANOR 88 FINGERSLOUIE THEWHITE BUFFALO POSTMALONEWITHFKI JAZZ CARTIER TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET THE BUNNY GANG SPEEDY ORTIZ PUP BEACH SLANG CHEF SPECIAL THE HOTELIER PRAYERS FIT FOR RIVALS DIRECT HIT! THE MOTH & THE FLAME ELWAY MAIN ATTRAKIONZ CAYETANA BROADWAY CALLS WHITE MYSTERY SKATING POLLY SOUVENIRS NORTHERN FACES DREAMERS PEARS MEAT WAVE ROZWELL KID SLEEP ON IT INPUT&BROKEN FAULKNER GATEWAY DRUGS DAYE JACK INDIAN SCHOOL SystemOfADown will be headlining @riotfest in Denver, Colorado this August. Tickets on sale now at systemofadown.com.
direct hit: OT
 FEST
 END ROD
 AUGUS
 DENVER,
 COLORADO
 NATIONAL WESTERN
 COMPLEX
 2015
 RIOTFEST.ORG OR TICKETFLY.COM
 SYSTEM OFADOWN MODEST MOUSE THE PRODIGY PIXIES SNOOP DOGG IGGY POP
 TENACIOUS D ICE CUBE&SPECIAL GUESTS RUN DMC RANCID MOTORHEAD.
 FLOGGING MOLLY COHEED ANDCAMBRIA DRIVELIKE JEHU L7 EXPLOSIONSIN THESKY
 KONGOS CYPRESS HILL ALKALINE TRIO THRICE COLD WAR KIDS THE AIRBORNE TOXICEVENT
 ANTHRAX IRATION BOOTSY COLLINS' RUBBER BAND YELAWOLF BABES IN TOYLAND
 DEATH GRIPS THE DAMNED EAGLESOF DEATH METAL THEMIGHTY MIGHTY BOSSTONES GZA
 OK GO DE LA SOUL TESTAMENT DESAPARECIDOS THE DEAD MILKMEN NADA SURF
 THE LAWRENCE ARMS REVEREND HORTON HEAT ANDREW W.K. GWAR THE BLACK LIPS
 THE GET UP KIDS AMERICAN NIGHTMARE BAYSIDE SWERVEDRIVER MILLENCOLIN
 THE VANDALS LESS THAN JAKE THE JOY FORMIDABLE DOOMTREE CLOUD CULT 7 SECONDS.
 OFF! BENJAMIN BOOKER JOYCEMANOR 88 FINGERSLOUIE THEWHITE BUFFALO POSTMALONEWITHFKI
 JAZZ CARTIER TEENAGE BOTTLEROCKET THE BUNNY GANG SPEEDY ORTIZ PUP BEACH SLANG
 CHEF SPECIAL THE HOTELIER PRAYERS FIT FOR RIVALS DIRECT HIT! THE MOTH & THE FLAME ELWAY
 MAIN ATTRAKIONZ CAYETANA BROADWAY CALLS WHITE MYSTERY SKATING POLLY
 SOUVENIRS NORTHERN FACES DREAMERS PEARS MEAT WAVE ROZWELL KID SLEEP ON IT
 INPUT&BROKEN FAULKNER GATEWAY DRUGS DAYE JACK INDIAN SCHOOL
SystemOfADown will be headlining @riotfest in Denver, Colorado this August. Tickets on sale now at systemofadown.com.

SystemOfADown will be headlining @riotfest in Denver, Colorado this August. Tickets on sale now at systemofadown.com.