ask


                    
                    
                
Crapping
Crapping

Crapping

In Bed Like
In Bed Like

In Bed Like

When Your
When Your

When Your

Wallet
Wallet

Wallet

Hungryness
Hungryness

Hungryness

Rareness
Rareness

Rareness

awkwardly
 awkwardly

awkwardly

stillness
 stillness

stillness

through
through

through

exceptional
exceptional

exceptional

🔥 | Latest

Apple, God, and Google: oooo Sprint LTE @ 99% 8:54 AM Settings Emergency Chat Meltdown gave you my phone because l can't use or process speech right now, but l am still capable of text communication. My hearing and tactile senses are extremely sensitive in this state, so please refrain from touching me. Please keep calm, and proceed to the next screen that has a simple chat client through which we can communicate. Continue R...ht New Message Send @ 99% ooo Sprint LTE 9:02 AM Settings Emergency Chat Today 9:02 AM would you like to get out of here? Left yes please R...ht New Message Send the I'm O p qw r У u f jk d gh а S C b Z X 123 return space sweetandsavageautistic: thathumanwiththecatears: kuroba101: sweet-and-tender: lesbiandana: hello! I don’t know if anyone has already made a post about this before, but I just stumbled upon this app made specifically for when you’ve gone into a nonverbal anxiety attack!!! it was made by Jeroen De Busser who is an autistic computer science student. the app is really easy to use! all you do is open it and hand your phone to someone you need to communicate with during an attack but physically cannot, and it shows this cool little alert for the person to read, and then it takes them to an easy to use chat (that looks a lot like texting! except both of you are communicating using the same device).  the alert message is completely customizable and you can have it say whatever you need!  the app is called Emergency Chat and it’s available in the Apple Store and google play store.  I highly recommend it to anyone who might need it :) OH MY GOD?!?!?? BOOST That’s so bootiful! thank you so much for this because i never know what to do when i cant talk to people and they just start trying to ask me questions and its really hard to force myself to say i cant talk and stuff. im definately getting this right now WHAT?
Apple, God, and Google: oooo Sprint LTE
 @ 99%
 8:54 AM
 Settings
 Emergency Chat
 Meltdown
 gave you my phone because l
 can't use or process speech
 right now, but l am still capable
 of text communication. My
 hearing and tactile senses are
 extremely sensitive in this state,
 so please refrain from touching
 me. Please keep calm, and
 proceed to the next screen that
 has a simple chat client through
 which we can communicate.
 Continue
 R...ht New Message
 Send

 @ 99%
 ooo Sprint LTE
 9:02 AM
 Settings
 Emergency Chat
 Today 9:02 AM
 would you like to get out of here?
 Left
 yes please
 R...ht New Message
 Send
 the
 I'm
 O p
 qw
 r
 У
 u
 f
 jk
 d
 gh
 а
 S
 C
 b
 Z
 X
 123
 return
 space
sweetandsavageautistic:

thathumanwiththecatears:

kuroba101:

sweet-and-tender:

lesbiandana:

hello! I don’t know if anyone has already made a post about this before, but I just stumbled upon this app made specifically for when you’ve gone into a nonverbal anxiety attack!!!
it was made by Jeroen De Busser who is an autistic computer science student.
the app is really easy to use! all you do is open it and hand your phone to someone you need to communicate with during an attack but physically cannot, and it shows this cool little alert for the person to read, and then it takes them to an easy to use chat (that looks a lot like texting! except both of you are communicating using the same device). 
the alert message is completely customizable and you can have it say whatever you need! 
the app is called Emergency Chat and it’s available in the Apple Store and google play store. 
I highly recommend it to anyone who might need it :)

OH MY GOD?!?!?? BOOST

That’s so bootiful!

thank you so much for this because i never know what to do when i cant talk to people and they just start trying to ask me questions and its really hard to force myself to say i cant talk and stuff. im definately getting this right now


WHAT?

sweetandsavageautistic: thathumanwiththecatears: kuroba101: sweet-and-tender: lesbiandana: hello! I don’t know if anyone has already ma...

Too Much, Tumblr, and Blog: fiyahacts fiyaharts: i just want to see diana swinging an absolutely HUGE sword with her huge muscles is that too much to ask forcommission info!!
Too Much, Tumblr, and Blog: fiyahacts
fiyaharts:

i just want to see diana swinging an absolutely HUGE sword with her huge muscles is that too much to ask forcommission info!!

fiyaharts: i just want to see diana swinging an absolutely HUGE sword with her huge muscles is that too much to ask forcommission info!!

Creepy, Drinking, and Facts: R 43% 20:41 Sean 4 days ago HOW YOU DOIBIPHY Hey Sean! X 3 days ago Hey yourself You know it was only last week said to my pal;'if a girl opened with a Friends quote I'd probably just marry her Oh shit, I better buy a dress! ORMAGIE COM GIPHY Should probably go out once or twice first. Just to keep everyone's parents happy Meh, fuck em Alright I like your attitude Good job really if we're getting married Tell me things What things would you like? I have much wisdom Top 5 facts about Sean Fact 1.I'm up at 5am so I must be rude and ask to continue this in the morrow if that's ok Request granted. But i want a further 5 facts 2 days ago Alright you ready? Born ready 11 have been in a coma for 2 days 2. I once played an astronaut in a Universal Studios show 3. I'll make you hate me via puns 4.I coach football. 5. I can make you laugh out loud wherever you are with one simple joke You go Excellent facts! Can you prove number 5 please? Oh shit I meant I have experienced a 2 day coma. Not the last 2 days Yes can. Why do flamingoes only lift one leg up when they stand? 1. I've never broken a bone 2. Even though I'm a strong independent woman. spiders and creepy crawlies in my house freak me tf out 3. Got 4 sisters and an army of nieces and nephews 4. My wit makes people either hate me or fall madly in love with me 5. I'm an excellent drinking buddy Go on.... Yes i gathered thats what you meant about the coma hahah If they lifted both up they'd fall Over Ok that was pretty funny Considering proved my number 5,l'd like you to do the same Deal. Name the place and time Yesterday He got me there!
Creepy, Drinking, and Facts: R 43% 20:41
 Sean
 4 days ago
 HOW YOU DOIBIPHY
 Hey Sean! X
 3 days ago
 Hey yourself
 You know it was only last week
 said to my pal;'if a girl opened
 with a Friends quote I'd probably
 just marry her
 Oh shit, I better buy a dress!
 ORMAGIE COM
 GIPHY
 Should probably go out once or
 twice first. Just to keep
 everyone's parents happy
 Meh, fuck em
 Alright I like your attitude
 Good job really if we're getting
 married
 Tell me things
 What things would you like? I
 have much wisdom
 Top 5 facts about Sean
 Fact 1.I'm up at 5am so I must
 be rude and ask to continue this
 in the morrow if that's ok
 Request granted. But i want a
 further 5 facts
 2 days ago
 Alright you ready?
 Born ready
 11 have been in a coma for 2
 days
 2. I once played an astronaut in a
 Universal Studios show
 3. I'll make you hate me via puns
 4.I coach football.
 5. I can make you laugh out loud
 wherever you are with one simple
 joke
 You go
 Excellent facts! Can you prove
 number 5 please?
 Oh shit I meant I have
 experienced a 2 day coma. Not
 the last 2 days
 Yes can. Why do flamingoes
 only lift one leg up when they
 stand?
 1. I've never broken a bone
 2. Even though I'm a strong
 independent woman. spiders
 and creepy crawlies in my house
 freak me tf out
 3. Got 4 sisters and an army of
 nieces and nephews
 4. My wit makes people either
 hate me or fall madly in love with
 me
 5. I'm an excellent drinking buddy
 Go on....
 Yes i gathered thats what you
 meant about the coma hahah
 If they lifted both up they'd fall
 Over
 Ok that was pretty funny
 Considering proved my number
 5,l'd like you to do the same
 Deal. Name the place and time
 Yesterday
He got me there!

He got me there!

Dad, Driving, and Girls: N ll 97% 09:01 X r/AskReddit u/vaultmaira12h Garbagemen of reddit, what's the most memorable thing you've found in the trash? Discussion 10.5k 1.7k Share Award BEST COMMENTS 7h My dad was doing some work at a mall and noticed e... JigglyPumpkin 3 PS3. Their kid must have dummied the CatV jack, becaus... NotShannon 11h MemeDeli 11h A corpse that turned out to be a Halloween prop. It scared... billbapapa 10h My friend works at the recycling and garbage Center. He s... deanjarois 5 5h Not a garbage man, but my dad was before I was born. He's found old fishing lures, a Bulova watch, but most importantly... girl's garbage route, My dad was the driver who had this one and every time the girl would hear the truck she'd get all the last minute garbage from the house and take it out so she could get a good look at all the garbage men. And she was interested in my dad. She even scheduled her radiography classes AROUND trash collection day, just so she'd be home. When my dad noticed the trend, he'd often switch roles with one of the guys on the back of the truck so he could take the girl's last minute garbage from her and toss it in. This went on for months. One day, the girl's father locked her out of the house and said he wouldn't let her back in until she gave her phone number to one of the garbage men. Coincidentally this was one day my dad was driving. She took the trash up to the guy on the back and she asked him, "Hey, is your driver seeing anyone?" The guy yelled to my dad "Hey Keith, are you seeing anyone?!?!" And this is how my dad found his most valuable treasure, my mom, in the garbage. They've been happily married for almost 26 years. Reply 8.7k 88 more replies On Ask Reddit
Dad, Driving, and Girls: N
 ll 97%
 09:01
 X
 r/AskReddit
 u/vaultmaira12h
 Garbagemen of reddit, what's the most
 memorable thing you've found in the trash?
 Discussion
 10.5k
 1.7k
 Share
 Award
 BEST COMMENTS
 7h My dad was doing some work at a mall and noticed e...
 JigglyPumpkin 3
 PS3. Their kid must have dummied the CatV jack, becaus...
 NotShannon
 11h
 MemeDeli 11h A corpse that turned out to be a Halloween prop. It scared...
 billbapapa 10h
 My friend works at the recycling and garbage Center. He s...
 deanjarois 5 5h
 Not a garbage man, but my dad was before I was born.
 He's found old fishing lures, a Bulova watch, but
 most importantly...
 girl's garbage route,
 My dad was the driver who had this one
 and every time the girl would hear the truck she'd get all the last
 minute garbage from the house and take it out so she could get
 a good look at all the garbage men. And she was interested in
 my dad. She even scheduled her radiography classes AROUND
 trash collection day, just so she'd be home. When my dad noticed
 the trend, he'd often switch roles with one of the guys on the
 back of the truck so he could take the girl's last minute garbage
 from her and toss it in. This went on for months. One day, the
 girl's father locked her out of the house and said he wouldn't
 let her back in until she gave her phone number to one of the
 garbage men. Coincidentally this was one day my dad was
 driving. She took the trash up to the guy on the back and she
 asked him, "Hey, is your driver seeing anyone?"
 The guy yelled to my dad "Hey Keith, are you seeing anyone?!?!"
 And this is how my dad found his most valuable treasure,
 my mom, in the garbage. They've been happily married
 for almost 26 years.
 Reply
 8.7k
 88 more replies
On Ask Reddit

On Ask Reddit

Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures u/Oceanundertow Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago Get startled by phone ringing It's one of my players Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?" Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a favor?" OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot." Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my laptop at the office so I can't play them." NaniTheFuck.mp3 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?" Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler." Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure." Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker." Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon." Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!" I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?" Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises) I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and says he'll see me on game night. Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable for once. I should have thanked him I am the dumb dumb mister. positive-memes:Bed time stories
Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures
 u/Oceanundertow
 Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago
 Get startled by phone ringing
 It's one of my players
 Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?"
 Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a
 favor?"
 OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif
 Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot."
 Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick
 story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the
 recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my
 laptop at the office so I can't play them."
 NaniTheFuck.mp3
 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?"
 Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC
 acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess
 Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler."
 Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure."
 Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to
 her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker."
 Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon."
 Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!"
 I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg
 Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS
 ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went
 deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?"
 Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises)
 I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story
 over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she
 eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and
 says he'll see me on game night.
 Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable
 for once. I should have thanked him
 I am the dumb dumb mister.
positive-memes:Bed time stories

positive-memes:Bed time stories

Fucking, God, and Internet: mandatalks: locatescape: ask-link-the-hylian-champion: theinfiknight: memeseverdie: bidfox: rnother-hen: neener-nina: deltadragoon: vikinglibertarian: zombie-alpaca-sex-tarp: bestrooftalkever: coolstoryrob: meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerlin: serionsly: voyagevisuelle: This a Moonmelon, scientifically knows as asidus. This fruit grows in some parts of Japan, and is known for its vibrant blue color. What you probably don’t know about this fruit is that it can switch flavors after you eat it. Everything sour will taste sweet, everything salty will taste bitter, and it gives water a strong orange-like taste. It’s also very expensive…costing about ¥16000 JPY (which is about 200 dollars). or you know this could be photoshopped but idk you tell me this is alexandrias melon (wow) it never grows seeds but it can still produce other melons (its magic) it is grown deep in the jungles of peru and can prevent you from aging well into the hundreds it is known by the natives there as k’uhul ajaw cacao shi-jiiy. its really strange how all of these pictures look exactly the same because everything on the internet is true This is the Peppermeloni. (seriously gosh just look at that sexy mother fucker) Its scientific name is Tumblrous Pepperonus. The only known specimen is in a pot in David Karps treasure dungeon. It is a tradition that a single slice is given to every tumblr blog that reaches 500,000 followers. It has the remarkable property of being as healthy as watermelon but tasting like cheesy pepperoni pizza. This planet is really just so amazing guys wow. Patrickmelon The taste of this melon will always surprise you. I’m fucking done with this site This is the evermelon. If you cut this watermelon a certain way you will find that it has seemingly regenerated. You can do this an infinite number of times and will have a neverending supply of melon. OH GOD I haven’t seen this post in YEARS and THAT is the fucking additon to it!? ALRIGHT THATS IT ITS TIME TO STOP Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Ravenmelon and I’m ebony black  (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips, and a lot of people tell me I look like watermelons (AN: if u don’t know what dat is get da hell out of here!). Nothing will ever be better than the last one HASHBFJGJDHRJFKFKRJ That last one took me out at the god damn kneecaps- Someone wrote a really interesting article about why people believe these sorts of things so easily.
Fucking, God, and Internet: mandatalks:

locatescape:

ask-link-the-hylian-champion:


theinfiknight:


memeseverdie:

bidfox:

rnother-hen:

neener-nina:

deltadragoon:

vikinglibertarian:

zombie-alpaca-sex-tarp:

bestrooftalkever:

coolstoryrob:

meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerlin:

serionsly:

voyagevisuelle:

This a Moonmelon, scientifically knows as asidus. This fruit grows in some parts of Japan, and is known for its vibrant blue color. What you probably don’t know about this fruit is that it can switch flavors after you eat it. Everything sour will taste sweet, everything salty will taste bitter, and it gives water a strong orange-like taste. It’s also very expensive…costing about ¥16000 JPY (which is about 200 dollars).

or you know this could be photoshopped

but idk
you tell me


this is alexandrias melon (wow)
it never grows seeds but it can still produce other melons (its magic)
it is grown deep in the jungles of peru and can prevent you from aging well into the hundreds
it is known by the natives there as k’uhul ajaw cacao shi-jiiy.
its really strange how all of these pictures look exactly the same because everything on the internet is true


This is the Peppermeloni. (seriously gosh just look at that sexy mother fucker) Its scientific name is Tumblrous Pepperonus.
The only known specimen is in a pot in David Karps treasure dungeon. It is a tradition that a single slice is given to every tumblr blog that reaches 500,000 followers.
It has the remarkable property of being as healthy as watermelon but tasting like cheesy pepperoni pizza.
This planet is really just so amazing guys wow.


Patrickmelon
The taste of this melon will always surprise you.

I’m fucking done with this site


This is the evermelon.
If you cut this watermelon a certain way you will find that it has seemingly regenerated. You can do this an infinite number of times and will have a neverending supply of melon.



OH GOD I haven’t seen this post in YEARS and THAT is the fucking additon to it!?

ALRIGHT THATS IT ITS TIME TO STOP


Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Ravenmelon and I’m ebony black  (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips, and a lot of people tell me I look like watermelons (AN: if u don’t know what dat is get da hell out of here!).


Nothing will ever be better than the last one 


HASHBFJGJDHRJFKFKRJ


That last one took me out at the god damn kneecaps-



Someone wrote a really interesting article about why people believe these sorts of things so easily.

mandatalks: locatescape: ask-link-the-hylian-champion: theinfiknight: memeseverdie: bidfox: rnother-hen: neener-nina: deltadragoon...