Both
Both

Both

And
And

And

Approvation
Approvation

Approvation

point
point

point

looking away
 looking away

looking away

dollars
 dollars

dollars

of america
 of america

of america

yours
yours

yours

ons
ons

ons

matter
matter

matter

🔥 | Latest

Animals, Apparently, and Comfortable: did you know? When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky at an animal rescue in Mississippi. He soon left town to visit family, but when he finally returned, she danced on his arm, put her head on his shoulder, and hugged him with her wings. PHOTO: FACEBOOK, WILD AT HEART RES CUE DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM wingedpredators: birds-and-pizza: talons-mcbeak: did-you-kno: When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky at an animal rescue in Mississippi. When Doug was growing up, a great horned owl used to perch on the top of his family barn. His father saw the owl often, but he and the rest of his family rarely did. However, on the morning of his father’s death, the owl was spotted overlooking the farm house, where Pojeky’s father had passed away, before flying off into the woods. “For some reason when that bird was hugging me, all I could think of was my dad.” Source Source 2 no no no no no this owl is not a happy owl this owl is an injured, weak owl with a head injury this owl is not displaying appropriate owl behaviors and is ill-equipped for life as a wild owl. this owl should be trying to escape and/or murder this man because that is just what owls do, especially great horned owls apparently this owl got released which really alarmed me because either she made a miraculous recovery or she was completely not in any way ready for release and doesn’t have great chances of survival believe me, i wish owls were all cuddly sweethearts who gave hugs and appreciated our care but that is so very much not reality. even the sweetest owl i know - who is the light of my life and a joy to work with - likes to murder stuff and will hiss and threaten you if he doesn’t trust you or wants you to gtfo. and when i say “sweetest owl” basically i just mean that he’s bonded to his two main trainers and is comfortable with us but if you ask anyone else he’s a grouchy old man with sharp talons. because he’s an owl. he’s not a snuggly pet. and he’s a 14-year-old captive-bred barn owl who has lived with humans and been an education bird his whole life, not a wild great horned owl who is clearly injured and having a shitty week of being grabbed and handled by giant mammals. this great horned owl is not a happy owl and it certainly isn’t feeling any sort of gratitude. mostly she’s too sick/injured to have enough energy to defend herself or hold her wings up or keep her eyes open. when wild animals get released it’s nice to think that they are silently thanking us for saving them, but that’s what we don’t want. we want them to be ready for life in the wild, which means we want them to hate us and want to avoid humans forever, because that gives them the best chance of survival. the best thanks you can get from a rehabilitated wild animal is when they fly/run/swim the fuck away from you as soon as you open the cage and never look back. those are the successes. I can preach what @talons-mcbeak said This owl obviously is not aware of anything that is going on and is showing signs of a very very serious head injury (trust me, I’ve seen my fair share). You can see in the gif she attempted to bite him. She is just too weak and sick to be able to stop this person from manhandling her. This man is not handling this bird right at all, and wild great horned owls are never friendly. That owl should not be put into those positions or used to promote such a disgusting lie by a man who obviously doesn’t know what he’s doing. It is a wild animal not a domestic. Do not believe this bullshit story! This! This 100 times over! UGH. I keep seeing this owl picture and story passed around on Facebook, Tumblr, etc. with captions of ‘awwwww’ and ‘Cute!’ and so forth. No. It’s not ‘cute’. That owl is so unfit to be released and weak and probably in high states of stress. Anyone who knows the slightest thing about owl behaviour knows that this is not a ‘thankful’ or ‘happy animal’. Owls can’t even feel any love-related emotions to humans. Period. Please share the truth about this story. The above two comments say a lot. :/ Shame on that ‘rehabber’ for passing on such false information and for treating that poor injured owl in such a way.
Animals, Apparently, and Comfortable: did you know?
 When GiGi the horned owl sustained
 a near-fatal head injury, she was
 nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky
 at an animal rescue in Mississippi. He
 soon left town to visit family, but when
 he finally returned, she danced on his
 arm, put her head on his shoulder, and
 hugged him with her wings.
 PHOTO: FACEBOOK, WILD AT HEART RES CUE
 DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM
wingedpredators:
birds-and-pizza:

talons-mcbeak:

did-you-kno:

When GiGi the horned owl sustained 
a near-fatal head injury, she was 
nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky 
at an animal rescue in Mississippi.
When Doug was growing up, a great horned owl used to perch on the top of his family barn. His father saw the owl often, but he and the rest of his family rarely did. However, on the morning of his father’s death, the owl was spotted overlooking the farm house, where Pojeky’s father had passed away, before flying off into the woods.
“For some reason when that bird was hugging me, all I could think of was my dad.”
Source Source 2

no no no no no
this owl is not a happy owl
this owl is an injured, weak owl with a head injury
this owl is not displaying appropriate owl behaviors and is ill-equipped for life as a wild owl. this owl should be trying to escape and/or murder this man because that is just what owls do, especially great horned owls
apparently this owl got released which really alarmed me because either she made a miraculous recovery or she was completely not in any way ready for release and doesn’t have great chances of survival
believe me, i wish owls were all cuddly sweethearts who gave hugs and appreciated our care but that is so very much not reality. even the sweetest owl i know - who is the light of my life and a joy to work with - likes to murder stuff and will hiss and threaten you if he doesn’t trust you or wants you to gtfo. and when i say “sweetest owl” basically i just mean that he’s bonded to his two main trainers and is comfortable with us but if you ask anyone else he’s a grouchy old man with sharp talons. because he’s an owl. he’s not a snuggly pet. and he’s a 14-year-old captive-bred barn owl who has lived with humans and been an education bird his whole life, not a wild great horned owl who is clearly injured and having a shitty week of being grabbed and handled by giant mammals. this great horned owl is not a happy owl and it certainly isn’t feeling any sort of gratitude. mostly she’s too sick/injured to have enough energy to defend herself or hold her wings up or keep her eyes open.
when wild animals get released it’s nice to think that they are silently thanking us for saving them, but that’s what we don’t want. we want them to be ready for life in the wild, which means we want them to hate us and want to avoid humans forever, because that gives them the best chance of survival. the best thanks you can get from a rehabilitated wild animal is when they fly/run/swim the fuck away from you as soon as you open the cage and never look back. those are the successes.

I can preach what @talons-mcbeak said

This owl obviously is not aware of anything that is going on and is showing signs of a very very serious head injury (trust me, I’ve seen my fair share). You can see in the gif she attempted to bite him. She is just too weak and sick to be able to stop this person from manhandling her.

This man is not handling this bird right at all, and wild great horned owls are never friendly. 
That owl should not be put into those positions or used to promote such a disgusting lie by a man who obviously doesn’t know what he’s doing.

It is a wild animal not a domestic. Do not believe this bullshit story!


This!
This 100 times over!
UGH.
I keep seeing this owl picture and story passed around on Facebook, Tumblr, etc. with captions of ‘awwwww’ and ‘Cute!’ and so forth.
No.
It’s not ‘cute’. 
That owl is so unfit to be released and weak and probably in high states of stress. Anyone who knows the slightest thing about owl behaviour knows that this is not a ‘thankful’ or ‘happy animal’. Owls can’t even feel any love-related emotions to humans. Period.
Please share the truth about this story. The above two comments say a lot. :/
Shame on that ‘rehabber’ for passing on such false information and for treating that poor injured owl in such a way.

wingedpredators: birds-and-pizza: talons-mcbeak: did-you-kno: When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nurs...

Children, Food, and Iphone: Keiko @LawyerGirIMiami Having kids without being both financially and mentally prepared to raise them, is child abuse. Tats Nkonzo @TatsNkonzo 9 Unpouplan opinion: Having babies edition 09:43 3/11/19 Twitter for iPhone 4,927 Retweets 11.2K Likes invincible-selfxmade-punk: gabarsomali: thejaystar13: gabarsomali: So only the rich can have kids? The is literally eugenicism but okay Everyone commenting on this says it’s Eugenics , but what the post said was financially prepared, not rich. As in if you’ve factored a child into your life and made the appropriate financial and life sacrifices it’s okay. Some poor people take better care of their children than wealthier people because they were willing and ready to put aside whatever it took to raise their child no matter what hardship they themselves will face, this actually incorporates both the mental and financial aspects of being ready to have a child. Whether you’re rich or poor, if you haven’t made a plan or set aside funds for your child it’s unfair to the child. Even if your preparation is making sure you’re on welfare, gathering food stamps and stocking up on free supplies, it’s enough to raise a child, just make sure you’ve prepared and are ready to do anything for that child. that’s a really good point, thank you for explaining! The dumbest thing I’ve ever been told when trying to explain why I didn’t want kids was this:“If you wait until you’re ready, you’ll never have them. Sometimes you just have to do it anyway.”No. Literally no I do not.
Children, Food, and Iphone: Keiko
 @LawyerGirIMiami
 Having kids without being both
 financially and mentally prepared to
 raise them, is child abuse.
 Tats Nkonzo @TatsNkonzo
 9 Unpouplan opinion: Having babies
 edition
 09:43 3/11/19 Twitter for iPhone
 4,927 Retweets 11.2K Likes
invincible-selfxmade-punk:

gabarsomali:

thejaystar13:


gabarsomali:

So only the rich can have kids? The is literally eugenicism but okay 

Everyone commenting on this says it’s Eugenics , but what the post said was financially prepared, not rich. As in if you’ve factored a child into your life and made the appropriate financial and life sacrifices it’s okay. Some poor people take  better care of their children than wealthier people because they were willing and ready to put aside whatever it took to raise their child no matter what hardship they themselves will face, this actually incorporates both the mental and financial aspects of being ready to have a child. Whether you’re rich or poor, if you haven’t made a plan or set aside funds for your child it’s unfair to the child. Even if your preparation is making sure you’re on welfare, gathering food stamps and stocking up on free supplies,  it’s enough to raise a child, just make sure you’ve prepared and are ready to do anything for that child.


that’s a really good point, thank you for explaining!

The dumbest thing I’ve ever been told when trying to explain why I didn’t want kids was this:“If you wait until you’re ready, you’ll never have them.  Sometimes you just have to do it anyway.”No.  Literally no I do not.

invincible-selfxmade-punk: gabarsomali: thejaystar13: gabarsomali: So only the rich can have kids? The is literally eugenicism but okay...

Bad, Jesus, and Lol: Today jesus you are rough on pants 331 A get angry with them that have to wear them. 700 AM holy hell, there are better ways to deal with that than to mas- sacre them. Most of us just, stay with me here... Take them off poor things did nothing to you. 740 AM The First step is admitting vou have a problem though. so it sounds like you've accepted your role in this and are ready for the next step. 744 AM Absolutely ready for the next step. Just not sure what that is lol 749 AM we've got to get you out of them and to an environment where you can't hurt them anymore. we in the industry call this place, 'South, I've been there, and you wouldn't believe it. there is not a single pant in sight. the good news is Im an expert at finding this mysterious place. I can guide you out of those pants and in to something far less appropriate 756 AM Sounds like an excellent next step 804 AM I think we need to rehearse before we take any drastic steps I'm going to need to see what I'm getting myself into. 811 AM Rehearsal is a must 812 AM Rehearsals start Monday Anytime that works for you. I do make house calls, but it's going to cost you extra 816 AM Oh darn. Not sure I can afford extra and leave a nice tip В19 АМ Don't worry about the tip, we can work something out а21 AN Oh perfect! 822 AM for my records I'm going to need you to fill out these forms. Full name: Proffered Contact: requested Appointment time Location 824 AM reason for visit 824 AM 9:45pm .I've been naughty.. 8:25 AM ille Oh forgot one. 826 AM Ok I've got you booked in for Monday I will be out of the office this weekend but just in case things get bad and you need to talk, ill keep my phone on me. looking forvward to touching bases with you and getting you out of those pants. 834 A Sounds great. Thanks so much for all the help and support 8:35 AM +pes meesnge She had 5 photos with ripped jeans
Bad, Jesus, and Lol: Today
 jesus you are rough on pants
 331 A
 get angry with them that
 have to wear them.
 700 AM
 holy hell, there are better ways
 to deal with that than to mas-
 sacre them. Most of us just, stay
 with me here... Take them off
 poor things did nothing to you.
 740 AM
 The First step is admitting vou
 have a problem though. so it
 sounds like you've accepted your
 role in this and are ready for the
 next step.
 744 AM
 Absolutely ready for the
 next step. Just not sure
 what that is lol
 749 AM
 we've got to get you out of them
 and to an environment where
 you can't hurt them anymore.
 we in the industry call this place,
 'South, I've been there, and you
 wouldn't believe it. there is not
 a single pant in sight. the good
 news is Im an expert at finding
 this mysterious place. I can guide
 you out of those pants and in to
 something far less appropriate
 756 AM
 Sounds like an excellent
 next step
 804 AM
 I think we need to rehearse
 before we take any drastic steps
 I'm going to need to see what I'm
 getting myself into.
 811 AM
 Rehearsal is a must
 812 AM
 Rehearsals start Monday Anytime
 that works for you. I do make
 house calls, but it's going to cost
 you extra
 816 AM
 Oh darn. Not sure I can
 afford extra and leave a
 nice tip
 В19 АМ
 Don't worry about the tip, we can
 work something out
 а21 AN
 Oh perfect!
 822 AM
 for my records I'm going to need
 you to fill out these forms.
 Full name:
 Proffered Contact:
 requested Appointment
 time
 Location
 824 AM
 reason for visit
 824 AM
 9:45pm
 .I've been naughty..
 8:25 AM
 ille
 Oh forgot one.
 826 AM
 Ok I've got you booked in for
 Monday I will be out of the office
 this weekend but just in case
 things get bad and you need
 to talk, ill keep my phone on
 me. looking forvward to touching
 bases with you and getting you
 out of those pants.
 834 A
 Sounds great. Thanks so
 much for all the help and
 support
 8:35 AM
 +pes meesnge
She had 5 photos with ripped jeans

She had 5 photos with ripped jeans

Fashion, Feminism, and Fucking: GOOD MORNING A WOMAN A CREWMAN duckbunny: quirkquartz: socialistexan: jazzchordravepiano: wetwareproblem: amayakumiko: thetrekkiehasthephonebox: spocks–cock: Christopher: A woman? Kirk: A crewman. OH LOOK AT THAT THE 1960S AND SHE’S IN COMMAND GOLD FUCKERS. She’s not in Medical blue, a caretaking, feminine role.   Those in Gold were either OFFICERS, NAVIGATORS, PILOTS, TACTICAL OFFICERS, or WEAPONS SPECIALISTS.   This is the Kirk everyone likes to forget. Y’all, if you care about feminism, then you ought to care about the history and context of the miniskirt. The 60s were an era of rebellion against the 50s, and the skirts were part of it. They were literally cutting edge fashion, and a statement that women made against the more housewifey style of skirt from the decade before. It was Grace Lee Whitney herself who suggested to Roddenberry that they wear them, and Nichelle Nichols has said she never had a problem with them. They are a product of their time yes, but the women chose to wear them because of the context of that time.  Also some men in Starfleet ware miniskirts and dresses: And some of the women wear pants: They’re given the power of choice, regardless of gender or sex. Shit ‘-’ None of this even clicked to me - Thats fucking glorious :D Picard in that dress is so good. Look at him! He looks formal and serious and dignified! He looks like he’s captain of his ship and he’s got some important business to do. And he’s in a dress and tights. And it’s not a joke. It’s not a joke about a man in a dress! It’s just, you know, a man who is wearing a dress, and that’s normal and appropriate. It’s part of the uniform. It fits him. It’s totally unremarkable and that is so rare and I’m so happy.
Fashion, Feminism, and Fucking: GOOD MORNING

 A WOMAN
 A CREWMAN
duckbunny:

quirkquartz:


socialistexan:

jazzchordravepiano:

wetwareproblem:

amayakumiko:

thetrekkiehasthephonebox:

spocks–cock:

Christopher: A woman? Kirk: A crewman.

OH LOOK AT THAT THE 1960S

AND SHE’S IN COMMAND GOLD FUCKERS.
She’s not in Medical blue, a caretaking, feminine role.  
Those in Gold were either OFFICERS, NAVIGATORS, PILOTS, TACTICAL OFFICERS, or WEAPONS SPECIALISTS.  

This is the Kirk everyone likes to forget.

Y’all, if you care about feminism, then you ought to care about the history and context of the miniskirt. The 60s were an era of rebellion against the 50s, and the skirts were part of it. They were literally cutting edge fashion, and a statement that women made against the more housewifey style of skirt from the decade before. It was Grace Lee Whitney herself who suggested to Roddenberry that they wear them, and Nichelle Nichols has said she never had a problem with them. They are a product of their time yes, but the women chose to wear them because of the context of that time. 

Also some men in Starfleet ware miniskirts and dresses:
And some of the women wear pants:
They’re given the power of choice, regardless of gender or sex. 

Shit ‘-’ None of this even clicked to me - Thats fucking glorious :D


Picard in that dress is so good. Look at him! He looks formal and serious and dignified! He looks like he’s captain of his ship and he’s got some important business to do. And he’s in a dress and tights. And it’s not a joke. It’s not a joke about a man in a dress! It’s just, you know, a man who is wearing a dress, and that’s normal and appropriate. It’s part of the uniform. It fits him. It’s totally unremarkable and that is so rare and I’m so happy.

duckbunny: quirkquartz: socialistexan: jazzchordravepiano: wetwareproblem: amayakumiko: thetrekkiehasthephonebox: spocks–cock: Chri...

Family, Iphone, and Tumblr: FOX FOX 5 DC 5 @fox5dc THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 10:33 AM May 28, 2019 from Washington, DC Twitter Web Client 15.6K Likes 2.6K Retweets Abbi Brown @AbbiSigns To be clear: a disabled child having to use a makeshift walker built out of cheap DIY materials instead of an appropriate walking aid designed and fitted by qualified medical professionals is not awesome. It's a travesty FOX @fox5dc May 28 5 FOX 5 DС THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 8:49 AM May 29, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 28.5K Likes 8.5K Retweets ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. Kill the Rich
Family, Iphone, and Tumblr: FOX
 FOX 5 DC
 5
 @fox5dc
 THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old
 Logan Moore needs a walker to get
 around but his family didn't know if
 insurance would cover for one, so his
 local Home Depot found parts to
 make it themselves.
 MORE:
 bit.ly/2YTichw
 10:33 AM May 28, 2019 from Washington, DC Twitter
 Web Client
 15.6K Likes
 2.6K Retweets

 Abbi Brown
 @AbbiSigns
 To be clear: a disabled child having to
 use a makeshift walker built out of
 cheap DIY materials instead of an
 appropriate walking aid designed and
 fitted by qualified medical
 professionals is not awesome. It's a
 travesty
 FOX
 @fox5dc May 28
 5 FOX 5 DС
 THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs
 a walker to get around but his family didn't know if
 insurance would cover for one, so his local Home
 Depot found parts to make it themselves.
 MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw
 8:49 AM May 29, 2019 Twitter for iPhone
 28.5K Likes
 8.5K Retweets
ladydiscomfortlover:
godloveyell:

thatpettyblackgirl:

Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown


And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. 
Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. 


Kill the Rich

ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should b...

Apparently, Drinking, and Gif: Sam Cristoforetti Follow @AstroSamantha "There's coffee in that nebula"... ehm, I mean... in that #Dragon RETWEETS FAVORITES 7,490 9,213 pepoluan: sourcedumal: tockthewatchdog: prokopetz: lilium-m: rainbowbarnacle: devilishkurumi: European Space Agency astronaut Samantha Cristoforetti, the first Italian woman in space, took a moment to celebrate Captain Janeway at around 250 miles above Earth. (CNET) (twitter) i bet someone else has already posted this by now but i thought it was really cool bc now we officially have had a cosplay selfie in space lmao also apparently this marks the first time a star trek uniform’s actually been worn in space i heard??? which is also awesome She did it again today! Also, in the picture she’s drinking coffee brewed with an espresso machine specifically engineered to work on the International Space Station - the ISSpresso (made in Italy!). The most amusing thing about this is that, at current launch prices, it costs in the neighbourhood of $4000 per pound to send stuff to the International Space Station. Eyeballing that uniform’s weight at about two pounds, this means that before Ms. Cristoforetti could take cosplay selfies on the ISS, she first had to propose to her nation’s space agency, with a straight face, that they should approve an extra eight grand to send that uniform up there with her in the first place - and that they agreed that this was, in fact, an appropriate use of their funding. Neeeeeeeerds. MY PEOPLE  This is awesome. I love Nerds in Space. All praise to Ms. Cristoforetti for making the dream come true.
Apparently, Drinking, and Gif: Sam Cristoforetti
 Follow
 @AstroSamantha
 "There's coffee in that nebula"... ehm, I
 mean... in that #Dragon
 RETWEETS
 FAVORITES
 7,490
 9,213
pepoluan:
sourcedumal:

tockthewatchdog:

prokopetz:

lilium-m:

rainbowbarnacle:

devilishkurumi:

European Space Agency astronaut Samantha Cristoforetti, the first 
Italian woman in space, took a moment to celebrate Captain Janeway at 
around 250 miles above Earth. (CNET) (twitter)
i bet someone else has already posted this by now but i thought it was really cool bc now we officially have had a cosplay selfie in space lmao
also apparently this marks the first time a star trek uniform’s actually been worn in space i heard??? which is also awesome



She did it again today! Also, in the picture she’s drinking coffee brewed with an espresso machine specifically engineered to work on the International Space Station - the ISSpresso (made in Italy!).



The most amusing thing about this is that, at current launch prices, it costs in the neighbourhood of $4000 per pound to send stuff to the International Space Station. Eyeballing that uniform’s weight at about two pounds, this means that before Ms. Cristoforetti could take cosplay selfies on the ISS, she first had to propose to her nation’s space agency, with a straight face, that they should approve an extra eight grand to send that uniform up there with her in the first place - and that they agreed that this was, in fact, an appropriate use of their funding.
Neeeeeeeerds.

MY PEOPLE 

This is awesome.

I love Nerds in Space.
All praise to Ms. Cristoforetti for making the dream come true.

pepoluan: sourcedumal: tockthewatchdog: prokopetz: lilium-m: rainbowbarnacle: devilishkurumi: European Space Agency astronaut Samantha...

Birthday, Jail, and Happy Birthday: My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Birthday
Birthday, Jail, and Happy Birthday: My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Birthday

My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Bir...

Birthday, Jail, and Happy Birthday: My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Birthday
Birthday, Jail, and Happy Birthday: My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Birthday

My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Bir...

Birthday, Jail, and Happy Birthday: AP My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Birthday
Birthday, Jail, and Happy Birthday: AP
My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Birthday

My boyfriend’s friend recently got out of jail, and today is his birthday. Of course, this is the only appropriate way to wish him Happy Bir...

Head, Hungry, and Lazy: The "I'm Not Angry" Mark Usage: When you need to be brief, but you're not angry Example We need to talk The Sinceriod Usage When you want to break out of your cycnical shell and be truly honest with someone. Example: Oh, wow, Thank you, This sweater is just what I wanted Sarcastises Usage The opposite of the sinceriod. Use when you want to be sarcastic, but in a way that's totally different and better from whatever system you're using now. Example: Oh, wow. Thank you. This sweater is just what I wanted. Hemi-Demi-Semi Colon Usage: If you don't know when it's appropriate to use a semi-colon, and you're too lazy to learn, you can use this in place of commas, semi-colons, and periods. Pretty much wherever you feel like it Eхample: Now I can act superior and avoid learning anything I'm a stain on humanity Andorpersand Usage: One simple symbol for "and/or" Example: Some people hate the very existence of the phrase "and/or, " but these people are uptight &o stupid Mockwotation Marks Usage: For quoting something that someone didn't say, but totally would say with the way they're being right now. The written equivalent of doing an impression of someone by saying "Look at me, I'm so-and-so" and wiggling your hands by your head, and speaking in a high-pitched voice. I'm Stacey. I'm going to complain about being hungry but not offer any suggestions of my own, said Stacey. Collegelf Superellipsis Usage: For an extreme dramatic pause. When you want the reader to wait a good 20 seconds before reading the next part of the sentence. Maybe even imagine the lights flickering and some thunder crashing. Example: He paused, cautiously, as he approached the superellipsis. On the other side he found... more words! Collegelm Morgan Freemark Usage: Reminds readers that they can read words in any voice they want, so maybe they should read these words in Morgan Freeman's voice. Example: And so, Kevin took this big swig of vodka and straight-up ran head-first into the wall you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks
Head, Hungry, and Lazy: The "I'm Not Angry" Mark
 Usage:
 When you need to be brief,
 but you're not angry
 Example
 We need to talk
 The Sinceriod
 Usage
 When you want to break out of your
 cycnical shell and be truly honest
 with someone.
 Example:
 Oh, wow, Thank you, This sweater
 is just what I wanted
 Sarcastises
 Usage
 The opposite of the sinceriod. Use when
 you want to be sarcastic, but in a way
 that's totally different and better from
 whatever system you're using now.
 Example:
 Oh, wow. Thank you. This sweater is
 just what I wanted.
 Hemi-Demi-Semi Colon
 Usage:
 If you don't know when it's appropriate to use a
 semi-colon, and you're too lazy to learn, you can use
 this in place of commas, semi-colons, and periods.
 Pretty much wherever you feel like it
 Eхample:
 Now I can act superior and avoid learning anything
 I'm a stain on humanity
 Andorpersand
 Usage:
 One simple symbol for "and/or"
 Example:
 Some people hate the very
 existence of the phrase "and/or, "
 but these people are uptight &o
 stupid
 Mockwotation Marks
 Usage:
 For quoting something that someone
 didn't say, but totally would say with the
 way they're being right now. The written
 equivalent of doing an impression of
 someone by saying "Look at me, I'm
 so-and-so" and wiggling your hands by
 your head, and speaking in a high-pitched
 voice.
 I'm Stacey. I'm going to complain about
 being hungry but not offer any suggestions
 of my own, said Stacey.
 Collegelf
 Superellipsis
 Usage:
 For an extreme dramatic pause. When you want the reader to
 wait a good 20 seconds before reading the next part of the
 sentence. Maybe even imagine the lights flickering and some
 thunder crashing.
 Example:
 He paused, cautiously, as he approached the superellipsis. On
 the other side he found... more words!
 Collegelm
 Morgan Freemark
 Usage:
 Reminds readers that they can read words in
 any voice they want, so maybe they should
 read these words in Morgan Freeman's voice.
 Example:
 And so, Kevin took this big swig of vodka
 and straight-up ran head-first into the wall
 you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com
lolzandtrollz:

New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

Birthday, Comfortable, and Confidence: reddit-tales What has been your worst "nice guy" experience? So, possibly one of the coolest things I've ever seen. I mean you know how you hear the "women want him, men want to *be* him" stuff in old movies? Well I'm a man and by *god* I wanted to be this guy. Anyway! I'm having dinner with my girlfriend at the time, and behind us are a couple on a not going well. Guy was being I rather inappropriate comments, the girl doesn't look at all comfortable. The girl finishes her appetiser really quickly my guess is she wanted to get it over with. Guy proceeds to comment on it and says "well, least I know you can swallow right?" Loudly Girl goes red and tells him that isn't appropriate, he literally waves his hand in a "shoo" type motion and says "oh calm down I was going to find out in a few hours anyway" I missed her exact re as she moved to a hushed tone, but it was fairly obvious what was being said-fuck no, fuck off, fuck this. He responded with "sweetheart I picked lost the colour in her face and said nothing. No. No. Fuck no. I'm one of those "get involved" type of people and there is no way I'm sitting here watching this go down. I get up. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I'm 23, fighting fit and happy to put that motherfucker through a wall. I may have had a slight temper in my youth. But anyway. I was halfway out of my chair when a hand came down on my shoulder and I look up to this mid-50s but super fit guy who says "Easy. I've got this one son". Absolute, total confidence in his voice.. so seeing as my current plan amounted to "stab him in the neck" and I'm already thinking maybe that's not the best idea, I sit down. He walks over, grabs a nearby chair, flips it around and sits down with the couple. Then.. he pulls out his police ID and puts it on the table. Now the guy doesn't have any colour in his face Cop: "So, I'm quietly celebrating my daughters birthday with my family when I distinctly hear you threaten this young lady, would you care to explain yourself?" Guy: "I, ah, well, um, you see. Cop: "That's what I thought. Now see, we take a *very* dim view of that kind of thing, so right now I'm deciding if I want to have some of my buddies come pick you up" Guy: "oh no well that..." Cop: "But that would disrupt everyone's dinner, so how about you hand me your ID, me, the dn't want yhe staff here and settle your bill., the full bill now, this young lady shouldn't go hungry on account of your poor behaviour. Or we can go with the first option, I'll leave it up to you. Guy: "No no! That's perfectly fine!" 1*hands over ID, gets up and walks very quickly in the direction of the counter Cop: while writing down the guys details 1* "Sorry about that miss, I hope I'm not intruding it just seemed like you could use some help. Oh and don't worry, if you want to pursue this further I'll have some of the boys pick him up on his way home, we can definitely take this further. Girl: "No, thank you so much, I wanted to run out 30 minutes ago but he drove me here". Cop: *shifts from hardarse cop to comforting father figure in about half a second* "Well I'm here with my daughter, she's about your age, perhaps you'd like to finish your meal with us? We can run you home afterwards if you'd like, unless you'd prefer to call someone else?" Girl: "Oh.. that would be really nice.. thankyou so much! *guy returns, so does the hardarse cop* Guy: "Uh so, I've paid the bill, if I could have back.". my Cop: "There you go. now I have your details right here so I *highly* recommend you don't go near or contact this young lady ever again. Guy: "Yes yes of course, I'm so sorry!" The quy pretty much fled the restaurant, the qirl went and sat with the cop and his family and by the time we left they were still sitting around talking and laughing about random crap. It was hands down the best way I have ever seen anybody handle any situation, ever. That cop is my hero. malicemanaged Dude. I hope that man has a great rest of his life. Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT
Birthday, Comfortable, and Confidence: reddit-tales
 What has been your worst
 "nice guy" experience?
 So, possibly one of the coolest things I've
 ever seen. I mean you know how you hear the
 "women want him, men want to *be* him"
 stuff in old movies? Well I'm a man and by
 *god* I wanted to be this guy. Anyway!
 I'm having dinner with my girlfriend at
 the time, and behind us are a couple on a
 not going well. Guy was being
 I
 rather
 inappropriate comments, the girl doesn't
 look at all comfortable.
 The girl finishes her appetiser really quickly
 my guess is she wanted to get it over with.
 Guy proceeds to comment on it and says
 "well, least I know you can swallow right?"
 Loudly
 Girl goes red and tells him that isn't
 appropriate, he literally waves his hand in
 a "shoo" type motion and says "oh calm
 down I was going to find out in a few hours
 anyway"
 I missed her exact re
 as she moved to a
 hushed tone, but it was fairly obvious what
 was being said-fuck no, fuck off, fuck this.
 He responded with "sweetheart I picked
 lost the
 colour in her face and said nothing.
 No. No. Fuck no. I'm one of those "get
 involved" type of people and there is no way
 I'm sitting here watching this go down. I get
 up. I don't know what I'm going to do, but
 I'm 23, fighting fit and happy to put that
 motherfucker through a wall. I may have had
 a slight temper in my youth. But anyway.
 I was halfway out of my chair when a hand
 came down on my shoulder and I look up
 to this mid-50s but super fit guy who says
 "Easy. I've got this one son". Absolute, total
 confidence in his voice.. so seeing as my
 current plan amounted to "stab him in the
 neck" and I'm already thinking maybe that's
 not the best idea, I sit down.
 He walks over, grabs a nearby chair, flips it
 around and sits down with the couple. Then..
 he pulls out his police ID and puts it on the
 table. Now the guy doesn't have any colour in
 his face
 Cop: "So, I'm quietly celebrating my
 daughters birthday with my family when I
 distinctly hear you threaten this young lady,
 would you care to explain yourself?"
 Guy: "I, ah, well, um, you see.
 Cop: "That's what I thought. Now see, we
 take a *very* dim view of that kind of thing,
 so right now I'm deciding if I want to have
 some of my buddies come pick you up"
 Guy: "oh no well that..."
 Cop: "But that would disrupt everyone's
 dinner, so how about you hand me your ID,
 me, the dn't want yhe staff here and
 settle your bill., the full bill now, this young
 lady shouldn't go hungry on account of your
 poor behaviour. Or we can go with the first
 option, I'll leave it up to you.
 Guy: "No no! That's perfectly fine!" 1*hands
 over ID, gets up and walks very quickly in the
 direction of the counter
 Cop: while writing down the guys details
 1* "Sorry about that miss, I hope I'm not
 intruding it just seemed like you could use
 some help. Oh and don't worry, if you want
 to pursue this further I'll have some of the
 boys pick him up on his way home, we can
 definitely take this further.
 Girl: "No, thank you so much, I wanted to run
 out 30 minutes ago but he drove me here".
 Cop: *shifts from hardarse cop to
 comforting father figure in about half a
 second* "Well I'm here with my daughter,
 she's about your age, perhaps you'd like to
 finish your meal with us? We can run you
 home afterwards if you'd like, unless you'd
 prefer to call someone else?"
 Girl: "Oh.. that would be really nice.. thankyou
 so much!
 *guy returns, so does the hardarse cop*
 Guy: "Uh so, I've paid the bill, if I could have
 back.".
 my
 Cop: "There you go. now I have your details
 right here so I *highly* recommend you
 don't go near or contact this young lady ever
 again.
 Guy: "Yes yes of course, I'm so sorry!"
 The quy pretty much fled the restaurant, the
 qirl went and sat with the cop and his family
 and by the time we left they were still sitting
 around talking and laughing about random
 crap.
 It was hands down the best way I have ever
 seen anybody handle any situation, ever. That
 cop is my hero.
 malicemanaged
 Dude. I hope that man has a great rest of his
 life.
Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT

Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT