Before
Before

Before

These
These

These

Pull
Pull

Pull

You Wont
You Wont

You Wont

Your
Your

Your

The
The

The

For Me
For Me

For Me

First Of All
First Of All

First Of All

Looking For
Looking For

Looking For

But
But

But

🔥 | Latest

Game of Thrones, Life, and Tumblr: shmemson: vernacular-manslaughter: octospider: Gwendoline Christie is the actress for Brienne of Tarth in Game of Thrones. She stands at 6 feet 3 inches tall and took swordfighting, horseriding, and stagefighting lessons for her part, as well as gaining 14 pounds of muscle, to accurately portray Brienne. (x) She was also terrified of cutting her hair because she’d spent her life believing it was one of the only things that would make people see her as feminine despite her height. In an interview with TV Guide she said: I struggled for a long time with [cutting] my hair, but then I’m grateful for the opportunity to realize that femininity doesn’t have to come from hair or any of those traditional female archetypes of appearance, So, that’s been exciting actually. I can’t speak with any kind of authority whatsoever because I’m just an actor and I only have my opinions, but I do think it’s really refreshing to have a woman depicted on a mainstream TV show that doesn’t obey typical aesthetics of females and the way they have been portrayed in the past. And I’m really excited to be portraying one of those women. And I hope that her popularity signals a greater expansion of people’s views about men and women and that gender types can be more flexible. She’s so so so so great. I think she’s just incredible.
Game of Thrones, Life, and Tumblr: shmemson:

vernacular-manslaughter:

octospider:

Gwendoline Christie is the actress for Brienne of Tarth in Game of Thrones. She stands at 6 feet 3 inches tall and took swordfighting, horseriding, and stagefighting lessons for her part, as well as gaining 14 pounds of muscle, to accurately portray Brienne. (x)

She was also terrified of cutting her hair because she’d spent her life believing it was one of the only things that would make people see her as feminine despite her height. In an interview with TV Guide she said:
I struggled for a long time with [cutting] my hair, but then I’m grateful for the opportunity to realize that femininity doesn’t have to come from hair or any of those traditional female archetypes of appearance, So, that’s been exciting actually. I can’t speak with any kind of authority whatsoever because I’m just an actor and I only have my opinions, but I do think it’s really refreshing to have a woman depicted on a mainstream TV show that doesn’t obey typical aesthetics of females and the way they have been portrayed in the past. And I’m really excited to be portraying one of those women. And I hope that her popularity signals a greater expansion of people’s views about men and women and that gender types can be more flexible.

She’s so so so so great. I think she’s just incredible.

shmemson: vernacular-manslaughter: octospider: Gwendoline Christie is the actress for Brienne of Tarth in Game of Thrones. She stands at ...

Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C awesomacious: A greatly written story
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 again
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and..
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own.
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the... I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height.
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face.
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "l'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed
 funny.C
awesomacious:

A greatly written story

awesomacious: A greatly written story

Apparently, Ass, and Crying: Anonymous 08/16/16(Tue)12:24:09 No.699763279 be fat >go to /fit/ and find a solution >main problem is i eat like a dumpster apparently things with loads of fiber is going to 211 KB JPG save my filthy soul "Fiber is digested slowly, leaving you feeling full longer, and helps with digestion" go out and buy two boxes of fiber-heavy breakfast bars the first day i have fiber bars for breakfast, lunch and a lot of snacks i dont shit that day next day i fiber myself up even more i dont shit that day either >fiber jesus is surely working his magic in my colon can feel the pounds dropping off because im not very hungry anymore i dont shit the third day >i dont shit the fourth day thefinaldaydawns.mp3 si have my morning coffee and feel my insides rumble in that familiar way the second i hit the toilet the weirdest fart in the world exits me it's whistling just a thin, continuous airstream of fart that smells like grandpapas coffin >no sound other than the whistling hiss suddenly stops the hole is plugged SOS >this shit is so solid it feels like i'm giving anal birth to Dwayne "The rock" Johnson >hang on to the shower curtain and pray the rock is shot out of my asshole at mach speed >my entire ass is covered in toilet water >now the fun begins a fart that could do more damage to thee ozone layer than aerosol ever did is shooting shit bullets out of me solid and prefectly round nuggets the smell is killing me blacking out the thuds of nuggets shooting around the bowl propelled by my insane fiber flatulence is giving me war flashbacks iwasntevenin'nam.jpeg my guts are yelling in german sounds like a moose in heat lives in my belly most of the shit isn't even digested at this point just forced out by all the gas that had been building up to my throat after an hour it finally seems to be over sim shivering and crying both legs collapse as i try to stand up >my stomach hitting the bathroom tiles forces one last trumpet gondorcallsforaid.rar shakily wipe my ass completely clean feniczoroark: larjmarge: itsperegrine: the-mighty-birdy: carolina-viking: th3laugh1ngt0mat0: carolina-viking: Holy fucking shit I CANT BREATHE I HAVE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE Pretty sure this has the most notes of any of my posts gondorcallsforaid.rar I’m in a ball on my bed with tears streaming down my face If I have to read this, so do you. This is funnier than it should be Omfg
Apparently, Ass, and Crying: Anonymous
 08/16/16(Tue)12:24:09 No.699763279
 be fat
 >go to /fit/ and find a
 solution
 >main problem is i eat like
 a dumpster
 apparently things with
 loads of fiber is going to
 211 KB JPG
 save my filthy soul
 "Fiber is digested slowly, leaving you
 feeling full longer, and helps with digestion"
 go out and buy two boxes of fiber-heavy
 breakfast bars
 the first day i have fiber bars for
 breakfast, lunch and a lot of snacks
 i dont shit that day
 next day i fiber myself up even more
 i dont shit that day either
 >fiber jesus is surely working his magic in
 my colon
 can feel the pounds dropping off because
 im not very hungry anymore
 i dont shit the third day
 >i dont shit the fourth day
 thefinaldaydawns.mp3
 si have my morning coffee and feel my
 insides rumble in that familiar way
 the second i hit the toilet the weirdest fart
 in the world exits me
 it's whistling
 just a thin, continuous airstream of fart
 that smells like grandpapas coffin
 >no sound other than the whistling hiss
 suddenly stops
 the hole is plugged
 SOS
 >this shit is so solid it feels like i'm giving
 anal birth to Dwayne "The rock" Johnson
 >hang on to the shower curtain and pray
 the rock is shot out of my asshole at
 mach speed
 >my entire ass is covered in toilet water
 >now the fun begins
 a fart that could do more damage to thee
 ozone layer than aerosol ever did is
 shooting shit bullets out of me
 solid and prefectly round nuggets
 the smell is killing me
 blacking out
 the thuds of nuggets shooting around the
 bowl propelled by my insane fiber
 flatulence is giving me war flashbacks
 iwasntevenin'nam.jpeg
 my guts are yelling in german
 sounds like a moose in heat lives in my
 belly
 most of the shit isn't even digested at this
 point
 just forced out by all the gas that had
 been building up to my throat
 after an hour it finally seems to be over
 sim shivering and crying
 both legs collapse as i try to stand up
 >my stomach hitting the bathroom tiles
 forces one last trumpet
 gondorcallsforaid.rar
 shakily wipe my ass
 completely clean
feniczoroark:

larjmarge:
itsperegrine:

the-mighty-birdy:


carolina-viking:

th3laugh1ngt0mat0:

carolina-viking:

Holy fucking shit I CANT BREATHE

I HAVE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE


Pretty sure this has the most notes of any of my posts

gondorcallsforaid.rar


I’m in a ball on my bed with tears streaming down my face 

If I have to read this, so do you.


This is funnier than it should be

Omfg

feniczoroark: larjmarge: itsperegrine: the-mighty-birdy: carolina-viking: th3laugh1ngt0mat0: carolina-viking: Holy fucking shit I CAN...

Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C awesomacious: A greatly written story
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 again
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and..
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own.
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the... I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height.
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face.
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "l'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed
 funny.C
awesomacious:

A greatly written story

awesomacious: A greatly written story

America, Ass, and Bad: Kodak Jack @thatgirlljackie Follow When you just gave birth but you have an exam tomorrow the-lady-of-lothlorien: patron-saint-of-smart-asses: curvella: supesean: dillonstpepper: leah-black: o———-w———-o: blackqueerblog: This really a strong ass picture. Black women are super heroes! I love everything about this, but might I ask. Why the FUCK is schooling so bad in America that a woman who just gave birth has to prepare for an exam tomorrow? @the American education system, bitch I remember getting ready to fight a teacher because he kicked out a single mother who’s babysitter fell through. The baby wasn’t even crying. I got his ass fired. I remember my friend taking her exam while her water was breaking, because her professor wouldn’t allow her to take the exam at a later date. you know, maybe we shouldnt glorify this shit and start working on making it so that women can have fucking kids and not get fucked over by the system. i was gonna say….this made me kinda sad lmao she should be resting. this isn’t “strong” it’s a sign of a failed system For anyone reading this: you have rights as a parenting/pregnant student under Title IX. You can reschedule in the event of a birth, among many other things. You can learn more at pregnantoncampus.org Reblogging for any of my followers that might need this
America, Ass, and Bad: Kodak Jack
 @thatgirlljackie
 Follow
 When you just gave birth but you have an
 exam tomorrow
the-lady-of-lothlorien:
patron-saint-of-smart-asses:

curvella:

supesean:

dillonstpepper:

leah-black:


o———-w———-o:

blackqueerblog:

This really a strong ass picture. Black women are super heroes!

I love everything about this, but might I ask. Why the FUCK is schooling so bad in America that a woman who just gave birth has to prepare for an exam tomorrow? @the American education system, bitch


I remember getting ready to fight a teacher because he kicked out a single mother who’s babysitter fell through. The baby wasn’t even crying. I got his ass fired.


I remember my friend taking her exam while her water was breaking, because her professor wouldn’t allow her to take the exam at a later date.  

you know, maybe we shouldnt glorify this shit and start working on making it so that women can have fucking kids and not get fucked over by the system.

i was gonna say….this made me kinda sad lmao she should be resting. this isn’t “strong” it’s a sign of a failed system


For anyone reading this: you have rights as a parenting/pregnant student under Title IX. You can reschedule in the event of a birth, among many other things. You can learn more at pregnantoncampus.org


Reblogging for any of my followers that might need this

the-lady-of-lothlorien: patron-saint-of-smart-asses: curvella: supesean: dillonstpepper: leah-black: o———-w———-o: blackqueerblog: Th...

Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C A greatly written story
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 again
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and..
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own.
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the... I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height.
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face.
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "l'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed
 funny.C
A greatly written story

A greatly written story