MY BID FOR PRESIDENT by Titania Gethsemane McGrath After much soul-searching I have decided to run for President of the United States of America as an independent candidate I am disillusioned with those from the Democratic party who intend to run Elizabeth Warren is insufficiently ethnic Bernie Sanders is far too male I feel duty-bound to seize control of the White House by whatever means necessary in order to oust the fascist dictator Donald Trump Here are some of my key policies Compulsory veganism All livestock currently in captivity will be released Ohio will be cleared of its entire human population and the freed animals will be able to roam at will in the state Electoral reform Ballots will no longer be anonymous and all those who vote for a Republican candidate will be subject to criminal prosecution This will ensure that the bad people never get into power again USA to be renamed Following the lead of Philippine president Rodrigo Duterte who wishes to rename his country Maharlika I will be renaming the USA as Titanitania or the United States of Wokeness Ending racism All white couples will be forced to apply for a licence to reproduce If successful they will be subject to a one-baby limit There are a number of obstacles to overcome As a foreign national I need to find a way to abolish the so-called Constitution in order to be eligible for the presidency Alternatively I am happy to identify as having been born in inner city Detroit Secondly I have little experience of actual politics But I feel that there are transferable skills from my activism and slam poetry There have been many occasions when I have chained myself to butcher shops to protest their lack of vegan options I have smeared menstrual blood on libraries that continue to stock books by white males I have participated in naked SlutWalks to raise awareness about the sexual objectification of women In many ways I am a modern day Rosa Parks Except of course I never take public transport Finally there is the small matter of cost Most of my money is tied up in investments or the refurbishment of my favourite gazebo So your donations will be required Allahu akbar Believe women Wakanda forever Meme

allahu akbar

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found ON 2019-02-21 09:55:46 BY astrologymemes.com

source: reddit